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Are You Catering to the King or Being True to Yourself?

Are You Catering to the King or Being True to Yourself?

Last updated on: September 12, 2025 at 5:24 am by Tom Rapsas

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Are You Catering to the King or Being True to Yourself? 2025-09-12T05:24:19-06:00 Tom Rapsas

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The parable of the Minister and the Monk, a story of two paths. Image generated by Gemini.

The Parable of the Minister and the Monk.

The following story originated in ancient Greece. It is often credited to Diogenes, a cynic philosopher who lived between 400 and 300 BC. In recent years, a newer version of the story is making the rounds. I heard about it from the life critic Bob Lefsetz and find it oddly compelling. I’ve paraphrased it here:

Two close boyhood friends go their separate ways and lose touch with one another.

Many years later, they meet on the road. One has become a rich and powerful minister to the king, the other a humble monk.

As they chat and catch up, the minister begins to feel bad for his friend the monk. While he is dressed in fine silk robes, the monk is wearing tattered clothes and is carrying a begging bowl. Seeking to help him, the minister says:

“You know, if you could learn to cater to the king you wouldn’t have to live on rice and beans.”

To which the monk replies:

“If you could learn to live on rice and beans you wouldn’t have to cater to the king.”

Two different people. Two different sets of values.

The minister values security, influence, and material comfort. He sees the monk’s life as one of hardship and wants to “save” him from it. He believes that a comfortable life is better and that success is measured by your ability to provide for yourself and gain power and influence.

The monk values freedom, simplicity, and independence. He sees the minister’s life as a form of servitude, a life where your actions are dictated by the need to please another. He sees the minister as being “trapped” by his wealth and position, believing true freedom lies not in accumulating more, but in needing less.

Who do you identify with, the minister or the monk?

Personally, I’m on team monk. Though there are many in our society who have made a different choice. And admittedly, while I’m a fan of the monk mindset, that doesn’t mean I live a monastic life. I’m somewhere in the middle, and maybe you are, too. I prefer comfort over excess in the place I live, the car I drive, and the clothes I wear. I value my spiritual well-being and peace-of mind over material possessions. But the question that really matters is:

Are you being true to yourself?

In his post on the minister and the monk, Lefsetz made an important point: “You’re as powerful as anyone, as long as you’re true to yourself.” And maybe that’s where true power resides—not with a king or a politician or a celebrity, but within yourself.

Being true to yourself means living in alignment with your core values and beliefs. You act, speak, and think in ways that are consistent with who you genuinely are. You don’t conform to external pressures or expectations that don’t represent how you really feel and who you really are.

Consider the following questions which may illuminate who you are and where you stand:

Are you self-aware? Do you have a deep understanding of your own emotions, strengths, weaknesses, and desires? Do you know what makes you happy? Do you know what you stand for?
Are you authentic? Do your actions and words genuinely reflect your inner self? Or do you pretend to be someone you’re not, hiding your opinions and interests to please others?
Do you possess integrity? Do you live by a personal code of ethics and values? Do you make choices based on what you believe is right, not what is convenient or expected? Do you stand up for your beliefs?
Do you accept your flaws and imperfections? Do you understand you’re a work in progress and treat yourself with kindness and compassion? Do you believe that each day is a fresh chance to get it right?

The parable of the minister and a monk is more than just a story of two different lives. It’s a mirror reflecting the choices we all face. Do we walk our own path and live the life we believe in? Or a path and life that others expect of us? It all comes down to being true to yourself—whatever that truth might be and wherever it might take you.

Careers, Workplace and Religion

Parables

being true to yourself

Bob Lefsetz

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