Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
New Visions
11 Traits of a Person with Character: How Many Do You Have?

11 Traits of a Person with Character: How Many Do You Have?

Last updated on: September 30, 2023 at 9:09 am by Tom Rapsas

0 Comments

11 Traits of a Person with Character: How Many Do You Have? 2023-09-30T09:09:05-06:00 Tom Rapsas

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Rachel McDermott via Unsplash

Who fills the void when leaders don’t lead, when those in positions of power and responsibility seem more interested in their own narrow self-interests than the greater good? You and me, of course. It may be our time to step up and display the moral and emotional qualities, such as honesty, kindness, and empathy, that are features of people of character.

Why is character important? Because it sets the tone for those around us, whether they be your co-workers, your children, grandchildren, or extended family. What you do and how you act rubs off on others, in positive or negative ways. It’s a choice. Do you lead by example? Can you engage in civil discourse with others even when they don’t share your point of view?

In The Road to Character, David Brooks defines what makes a person of character. It starts with having a certain set of universal traits that include a code of ethics, an inner knowing of what is fair and just. These values have nothing to do with your political affiliation, your social or economic status or your religion. They have everything to do with what makes you tick.

Scanning Brooks’ book, I compiled a list of the attributes that help define a person of character and put them into an 11-point list.

11 Traits of People with Character (According to David Brooks)

They possess an inner cohesion.
They are calm, settled, and rooted.
They are not blown off course by storms.
They don’t crumble in adversity.
Their minds are consistent and their hearts are dependable.
They answer softly when challenged. They are silent when unfairly criticized, restrained when others try to provoke them.
They get things done. They recognize what needs doing and they do it.
They make you feel funnier and smarter when you speak with them.
They move through different social classes not even aware they are doing so.
You’ve never heard them boast, you’ve never seen them self-righteous or doggedly certain.
They aren’t dropping little hints about their own distinctiveness and accomplishments.

Brooks also tells us about the flip side of character, pointing out that those who lack it “never develop inner constancy, the integrity that can withstand popular disapproval or a serious blow. They find themselves doing things that other people approve of, whether these things are right or not. They foolishly judge other people by their abilities, not by their worth.”

Those with character have followed a different path.

Brooks points out that the person with character has a different set of priorities. They have surrendered “the climb to success” and instead have decided to “deepen the soul” (choosing character over career). They have learned to suppress the ego, or in Brooks’s words “quit the self,” and they find it is better to give than to receive.

People with character are humble. They are open to the idea that they don’t know everything—and are open to finding answers from anyone at any time. This is important: When you think you know everything, you stop learning, and growing, as a person. Here’s more from Brooks on the value of humility and how the humble person compares to the ego-driven know-it-all:

The humble person is soothing and gracious, while the self-promoting person is fragile and jarring. Humility is freedom from the need to prove you are superior all the time, but egotism is a ravenous hunger in a small space—self-concerned, competitive and distinction-hungry. Humility is infused with emotions like companionship, love and gratitude.

The act of being humble may require some effort on our part, especially in a world where boasting and self-congratulation seem baked into our culture, as evidenced everywhere from Washington, DC, to the NFL. That means we need to become “strong in the weak places” by magnifying what is best in ourselves and suppressing what is unpleasant, including any hints of arrogance or pretentiousness.

Brooks also reminds us that we are not alone in our efforts to be men and women of character. While we must lean heavily on our inner resources, we also can look outside ourselves for help. It is “never a solitary struggle.” In his words:

No person can achieve self-mastery on his or her own. We all need assistance from the outside—from family, friends, role models, rules, traditions, institutions, and, for believers, from God.

It is an on-going process, one that starts at home and extends to the relationships at our workplace and in our community. It involves striving to improve ourselves each day by emulating those we respect and strengthening our moral core. We can be helped by reading the wise words of others or engaging in a regular spiritual practice, at home or through a religious institution. We do whatever it takes to live a life that is an example for others.

This story will be included in the book version of Wake Up Call, a compilation of my top stories from 2013-2023. It will be released January 1, 2024, via Wildhouse Publishing.

Character

David Brooks

Humility

Previous Post

April 12, 2023

What’s the Secret of the Happiest People in the World?

Next Post

April 27, 2023 The Guy from Jersey Who Found the Secret to Life

Recent Comments

0 | Leave a Comment

"How?"

Craig

The Amazing World of Non-Speakers: Are ..."

"WoW Trey! This is a fabulous article just chock full of great insights and wisdom! ..."

I_Am_SheilaING

What a Guy Who Interviewed 500+ ..."

"I participate in a blog which reads theological works one chapter at a time before ..."

glen smith

The Amazing World of Non-Speakers: Are ..."

"this stuff has been disproven for a very long time. You can believe what you ..."

A fish with no hands

The Amazing World of Non-Speakers: Are ..."

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category 50+ Spirituality 60 Second Inspiration Activism Adversity Afterlife agape aging Aliens Angels Angels and aliens anger animism Astrology Atheists Attention Attitude Authenticity Awareness Awe Ayahuasca Balance Beginnings Being Present Belief Bhagavad Gita Bible birth of Jesus Blessings Bliss Bono Breathing Buddha Buddhism Calling cats Centered Centering Prayer Chakras Change Character Character and Aging Christ consciousness Christianity Christmas Church Civility commencement speeches commitments compassion Connecting with God Consciousness Contemplation Contemplative Prayer Contentment Conversations with God Coping Coping mechanisms Corinthians Coronavirus Covid creativity Daily practice Dalai Lama David Brooks David Frenette Death Deathbed visions Decisions determinism Discernment disconnecting Donald Shimoda Dreaming of the Dead dreams Drinking Easter Eastern religion Eckhart Tolle ego Elders Emerson Engagement Enlightenment everyday magic Evil Spirits Expectations experience Faith fate Fatima Fear Feel Finding God Fitness Fulfillment Gandhi Gary Zukav Generosity Giving Gnostic gospels Gnostics God God's will Golden Rule Good & Evil Gospel of Thomas Gospels Grace Gratitude Grief Growing Older Guardian Angels gumption Gurus Halloween Happiness health health and happiness Heaven Helping others High Strangeness Hinduism Holiday Season honesty Honor Hope Humility impostor syndrome inner music Inner Work Insights insomnia Inspiration Inspirational intuition Investing Jeff Bridges Jesus Jesus Christ John Templeton joy joy of life Justin Bieber Kaballah Kabbalah Karma Kindness koans Law of Attraction Life Life after Death Life and death Life Balance Life Hacks Life Lessons Life Path Life Philosophy Life Plan life purpose Life Rules Life Tips Life's Big Questions Lindsay Lohan Listening Living Intentionally Loneliness Love Magic Mark Twain Marriage Meaning of Life Meditation mentor Mentors Mid-Life Crisis Mindful Mindfulness Money Monks Multiverse Mysterious World mystical experience Mysticism Mystics Mythology Napoleon Hill Near Death Experience (NDE) New Thought New Year New Year's resolutions Noise Oprah out-of-body experience Parables Peace of mind philosophy Plant Intelligence Pope Francis Positive Thinking Prayer prayers for the spiritual Preachers Premonitions presence Prophecies Prophecy Prophets Psalms Purpose Purpose of Life quietude Quotes Ralph Waldo Emerson Ralph Waldo Trine Reconnect Recovery reincarnation Relaxation Religion resolutions Resurrection Ritual Rituals Rules to Live By sadness Sam Harris Sandy Second Act Seeking self Self Mastery self-help self-improvement Seneca sermon sex shamans Sickness Silence Silence of God sleep small voice Smiling Social Activism solitude Soul Soul and Spirit Soul Awakening Spiritual Awakening spiritual beliefs spiritual guidance spiritual journey spiritual living spiritual path Spiritual philosophy Spiritual Practice Spirituality Spirituality and work Spooky Spirituality Stillness stoicism stoics Storytelling Stress Relief Success Suffering Suicide Surrender tao Thanks Thanksgiving the afterlife the bardo the Bible the Blues The Election the Kingdom the secret the self The Soul Thomas Keating Thomas Merton Thomas Moore Time Tony Robbins tradition UFOs Uncategorized Universe Values visualization Voice of God Wake Up Call Wake Up Call book Walls Walt Whitman Well-being Winter Blues Wisdom words to live by Work work/life balance worry Yogananda Zen

Select a Month October 2026 September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 May 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 July 2012 April 2012 March 2012 January 2012 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 December 2009 November 2009

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What did King Nebuchadnezzar order everyone to worship?

Select your answer to see how you score.

The sun His crown A lion A golden statue

Books by This Author Books by Wake Up Call

See All Titles »