Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Victorious Living

Home
Family, Parenting and Religion
Are My Emotions Lying to Me?

Are My Emotions Lying to Me?

Last updated on: December 25, 2019 at 5:00 am by Victorious Living

Are My Emotions Lying to Me? 2019-10-25T11:57:05-04:00 Victorious Living

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Emotions are complicated. In our modern culture we really aren’t sure what to do with them. We are both afraid of them and addicted to them. We ignore them or we worship them.

Our feelings are an important tool for vibrant living. They are important for our relationships. But how do we know if what we are feeling is right? How do we know if our emotions are telling us the truth?

Feel

First and foremost, our feelings are always valid. In that sense, they are always true. We often try to shut down our emotions because we think what we feel is wrong. And that is not really the way it works.

How you feel is not the part that is wrong. Emotions are one aspect of the truth. They are always true. They cannot help but be true. In so far as they are appropriately applied.

Our feelings are an alarm clock alerting us to our values. They let us know that something that matters to us is at stake. And that is always a good thing.

Where we go wrong is in allowing our emotions more than they are responsible for. Our emotions, in a strange sort of way, cannot lie to us because they are neutral. Your alarm clock is just telling you to wake up in the morning. It is not telling you what kind of day you ought to have.

Think

The deceit comes not from our emotions themselves but from our reaction to the emotion.

When we feel anger, we automatically start thinking something negative is happening. That we need to fight. But that is not always the case. Anger, like all emotions, is alerting us to a value. It does not tell you if the value is being attacked, ignored, or exposed in a scary-vulnerable sort of way.

When we think the traditional positive/negative emotions necessitate corresponding positive/negative reactions from us, we are deceiving ourselves. It is not our emotion that lies to us; it is our discernment. Our self-awareness lets us down. Our perspective is what falls short.

The fault is not in the feeling but in the way we process the feeling. Our emotions are a part of the truth, but not the whole truth. When we try to ask our emotions to tell us how to think and what to do, we are surrendering to them more authority than they can handle.

Act

So what happens is we act in a way that may be contradictory to our character. We do something that is not in alignment with the very values the emotions are trying to alert us of because we are trying to justify or silence the emotions rather than move on to addressing the value they represent.

How many times have you asked yourself, why did I do that?!

Our lack of clarity and our lack of truth does not happen because our emotions are imperfect. It happens because we do not know the proper way to utilize our emotions.

Your emotions do not lie to you. They invite you to make decisions. They are a tool that can help reveal your values. What value is the emotion alerting you of? Why? What should you do in response? These are a matter of thought and perspective. A matter of self-awareness, discernment, and wisdom. It is in those arenas we let ourselves down.

Previous Post

December 23, 2019

Pa Rum Pum Pum Pum

Next Post

December 27, 2019 The Day After Christmas

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Choices Conflict Resolution Culture Change Emotions Failure Faith Fear Freedom V Growth Healthy Communication Hope Identity Influence Leadership Learn Mistakes Mood Curve Ownership Perspective Power Relationships Self-Awareness Self-Governance Systems Thinking Three Things You Control Transformational Leadership Trust Truth Uncategorized Values Vision

Select a Month January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

How many chapters are in the book of Genesis?

Select your answer to see how you score.

40 50 66 45

Books by This Author Books by Victorious Living

See All Titles »