Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Victorious Living

Home
Family, Parenting and Religion
How To Learn From Your Mistakes

How To Learn From Your Mistakes

Last updated on: September 8, 2019 at 11:33 pm by Victorious Living

How To Learn From Your Mistakes 2019-09-08T23:33:59-04:00 Victorious Living

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

It happens everyday. We mess up. We make mistakes. Imperfect people make imperfect choices. We live in flawed communities with faulty relationships, all in the midst of a culture striving to be better. Part of the striving includes inevitable failure. But how do we make sure we fail forward?

Believe it or not, every situation, season and setting are an opportunity to learn. Pain is a faithful teacher. Like a kid falling off a bike, scraped knees can either be the evidence of learning or of giving up.

Opportunity

The first step is to truly believe that mistakes are opportunities. We have to be more committed to growing than we are afraid of suffering. A lot of us are looking for reasons to justify our hurt, peering around every corner for the inevitable foot to fall.

We look at others and imagine it came easy for them. We imagine they roll out of bed looking like that or earning that much money or capable of that much wisdom. There are certainly gifts that set us up, but nobody is successful (by any definition of the term) without having learned from mistakes.

The way we approach mistakes will determine how we leave them. A healthy perspective about breaking some eggs to make some omelets will go a long way.

Ownership

Our brain is very good at protecting itself. As soon as a mistake is made, we start to look for someone to blame. Our finger extends and starts to wave outward. There are patterns of thinking and behavior we have developed and the brain’s natural tendency is to reinforce what it knows.

We develop a victim mentality that does not take ownership or responsibility for ourselves. Even if things are not truly our fault, we have to be on the lookout for our agency and its role in the mistake. The only way we can change for the better is to recognize that we have some ownership, some influence, some responsibility in what is happening.

Identity

On the other extreme, we learn from challenges by separating what we are doing from who we are. Taking ownership for our mistakes is not the same thing as letting our mistakes define us.

Every decision is not a microcosm of who you are. It is a part of who you are. A part that can be changed and redeemed. We’ve got to learn to separate the part from the whole if we want any chance of learning.

Why?

The best tool for learning is having an intentional vision of where we are going. It helps us see where and why we are falling short, helps motivate us past our fear of rejection, and it gives us a reason to strive, to be better, to learn.

If we are creating something, we are better suited to learn from our mistakes and continue on the journey, the quest toward the purpose. In the absence of vision, we just don’t want to make a mistake. The fear of imperfection is the inevitable stop-gap vision we humans adopt. And it isn’t the best. It doesn’t motivate.

Our mistakes are part of the journey. They are the terrain of experiences on the map guiding us towards our purpose. Sometimes we need to zoom out and see the whole map and where we are on the journey, appreciate the cause and effect, and make the most our of the opportunity of today.

Previous Post

September 28, 2018

3 Reasons You Aren’t Changing Your Behavior (Even When You Want To)

Next Post

October 3, 2018 Everyone is a Leader

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Choices Conflict Resolution Culture Change Emotions Failure Faith Fear Freedom V Growth Healthy Communication Hope Identity Influence Leadership Learn Mistakes Mood Curve Ownership Perspective Power Relationships Self-Awareness Self-Governance Systems Thinking Three Things You Control Transformational Leadership Trust Truth Uncategorized Values Vision

Select a Month January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What does Paul say happens when we are baptized into Christ Jesus?

Select your answer to see how you score.

We are saved We receive the Holy Spirit We are baptized into his death We become children of God

Books by This Author Books by Victorious Living

See All Titles »