There Will Be No Male and Female Bathrooms in Heaven (and no Marriage, Either)

Last updated on: April 29, 2016 at 10:09 am by Kyle Roberts

There Will Be No Male and Female Bathrooms in Heaven (and no Marriage, Either) 2016-04-29T10:09:18-05:00 Kyle Roberts

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Dear Jesus:

“There were seven brothers; the first married and, when he died, left no children; and the second married the widow and died, leaving no children; and the third likewise; none of the seven left children. Last of all the woman herself died. In the resurrection whose wife will she be? For the seven had married her.” (Mark 12:20-22)

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In this passage, some Sadducees (who didn’t believe in an afterlife/resurrection) try to corner Jesus with a complicated question about marriage. They pose a hypothetical scenario to Jesus; this scenario has its basis in an Old Testament law (a social/legal policy) that Moses established, know as “Levirate marriage”

The basic policy is this: If a man’s brother dies, and if his brother was married, that man is expected (even required) to marry his brother’s widow. This is designed to protect the widow, who would otherwise be thrust out on her own to fend for themselves—often without a way to make a decent wage. But it was also designed to protect the child of the deceased—and to secure the legacy of the deceased brother by ensuring for him an heir.

Jesus responded by affirming his belief in a bodily resurrection (siding with the Pharisees). But he also pointed out that after the resurrection, things will be different. Resurrected bodies are transformed and relationships are different. There is no more marriage after the resurrection. While the resurrection means that some things remain the same (we will have bodies) everything will also be different enough that the “rules” that governed everyday life and religious practices before (i.e. he law of Moses) no longer will apply in the same way.

Now for the egalitarian insight:

In the ancient Near Eastern (and Jewish) context, women were considered property of their husbands and, prior to marriage, of their fathers. (This is one reason why so-called “biblical marriage” is not something we should hold up today as the ideal for our own marriages).

So Jesus says that, after resurrection, there is no marriage or giving in marriage. The patriarchal system and the protections it may have afforded the vulnerable (in the context in which it may have been necessary) is defunct, redundant, unnecessary.

Jesus might even be suggesting that, after resurrection, sex difference disappears altogether.

He says, “For when they rise from the dead, they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven.” (v. 25)

But the implication quickly follows from this: If the picture of resurrection is what the kingdom is like, and if we’re supposed to pray for the kingdom to come on earth as it is in heaven, why do so many Christians continue to perpetuate an oppressively patriarchal system (under the name, “complementarianism”) and anxiety-driven binary views of sex/gender difference?

The exegesis police may arrest me for this, but let’s take it even further: Just as there will be no marriage in heaven (since we’ll be like the angels), there will be no male and female bathrooms, either.

But if there will be no male and female bathrooms in heaven, why are we so worried about policing them now?

Why do we so aggressively hold on to the past, present, and fading order of things, rather than aspire toward the new, which is on its way? Why bind ourselves anxiously to the law, when freedom and grace is better?

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