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Shadow Projection: Finding Our Hidden Life in Others

Shadow Projection: Finding Our Hidden Life in Others

Last updated on: September 13, 2024 at 8:26 am by Dr. Mike Simmons

Shadow Projection: Finding Our Hidden Life in Others 2024-09-13T08:26:35-07:00 Dr. Mike Simmons

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“No matter how hard you fight the darkness, every light casts a shadow, and the closer you get to the light, the darker that shadow becomes.” – Plato

What is Psychological Projection?

Shadow consists of our discarded, unwanted, or hidden parts/qualities that do not align with our conscious identity–it is all that we are that we wish we weren’t. Projections occur when we unconsciously place our hidden life onto other people and situations. This usually happens through the stories, messages, and judgments we tell ourselves about them. The content of our projections is essentially ours, but we cannot yet claim it, so we experience it first out “there.” Like many Jungian concepts, the term ‘projection’ gets a bad rap. So, allow me to offer clarity.

Projections Can Be Positive or Negative.

We project, at some level, in an attempt to distance ourselves from the parts of our personality that do not align with our conscious (ego) identity. Projections can be either negative or positive. Negative projections consist of personal qualities, which are generally seen as unwanted and/or socially undesirable. Conversely, positive projections tend to consist of unconscious qualities or gifts that feel too good, too powerful, or even too godlike to consider as our own.

Negative Projection Example

Imagine you feel you cannot take up space in conversation. You likely learned in your early years that doing so was selfish, inconsiderate, and even got you in trouble, or worse. Because of this, you unconsciously tossed your voice, opinions, and confidence into shadow. Then, as an adult you encounter a coworker who talks a lot, and has no problem taking up space. You may start burning with irritation, judging them, and even avoiding this person altogether. Yes, this coworker may be objectively insufferable, or maybe they’re more complex than the story you’ve formulated. Either way, the energy charge you feel around them leaves you activated, irritated, and caught in a rumination loop.

Positive Projection Example

On the other hand, suppose you have an undeveloped gift and passion for public speaking. When you encounter a person who has thoroughly mastered this gift, you may find yourself magnetically drawn to them. They are human of course, but they seem godlike, and you feel mysteriously divine in their presence. One explanation is you are unconsciously seeing in them your “inner gold” that is too luminous and weighty for you to see in yourself. You long to be in their presence, to feel their acceptance and receive their approval. You may even change plans or manipulate a given situation in order to be in their proximity and catch some of that gold.

‘Hooked’ by a Partial Truth in Others

“Everything that is unconscious in ourselves we discover in our neighbor, and we treat him accordingly.” – Carl G. Jung

We don’t randomly project onto just anyone. There is always a ‘hook’ in them that reaches into our unconscious and pulls out our hidden self (watch/listen to This Jungian Life podcast episode, Projection: When the Dart Lands for more!). For example, a truly inconsiderate person may become a screen upon which we can send our own unconscious capacity for rude, self-centered, or presumptuous behavior. The more we see ourselves as one-sidedly kind, accommodating, and thoughtful, the more we detach from our opposite capacity for rudeness, selfishness, and inconsideration. To the extent we are unaware of our shadowed qualities and capacities, the more we disown them in ourselves and only experience them in others.

Projections Serve as Rearview Mirrors

“When we look in a rearview mirror we see what is behind us, but in our actual experience we are looking at something in front of us.” – Jason E. Smith (Jungian Analyst) via Digital Jung Podcast

“It’s me, Hi, I’m the problem, it’s me […] I’ll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror. It must be exhausting […]” – Taylor Swift, Anti-Hero

Mirrors enable us to see ourselves. Projections, like mirrors, help us see what is out of sight, hidden from our line of sight. Projections aren’t inherently bad, but functional. Mirrors help us see what is often too close, hidden in plain sight. Think about it. No one has ever seen their own face without encountering it in a projection, or reflection!

I often have clients report feeling guilty for projecting or judging others, especially if they have internalized Christian codes of moral purity. But in shadow work, we invite the projections, feel the bodily reactions they elicit, and bring them to speech. Projections often feel like judgments, so acknowledging them might trigger a corrective voice such as, “Judge not lest you be judged.” Freud called this the Superego. For many raised in Evangelicalism (or the Common Christian Myth), this is synonymous with the voice of God. Fear of hell and the anxiety of divine disappointment are frequently sufficient deterrents from deeper engagement with projections.

In an attempt to align with what is deemed morally correct, individuals split further from their shadow. They suppress their judgments further down, which only results in more intense projections, further soul-splitting, and relational isolation. Attempting to rid themselves of impurity, the opposite forms in their unconscious. Life narrows until they are fenced in to a small plot of infertile, inner-terrain that defends itself from all forms of life.

Questions to Consider for Engaging Shadow Projections

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your neighbor, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your neighbor’s eye.” – Jesus, Matthew 7:3-5 NIV

How are you reacting/responding to your projections?

What we encounter and react to in others can be an invitation to deeper reflection and self awareness. In fact, the goal isn’t to stop projecting but to utilize our projections to own back our hidden life. Just as a movie screen is a tool by which we watch a feature film, our projections enable us to see and engage our inner drama. We can’t stretch the roll of the film out and understand the plot, themes, or characters. We need the screen in order to truly understand the story. So, neither ignore or fixate on the speck of sawdust in your neighbor’s eye, but let it lead you to greater clarity within.

Where in your life are you acting?

The word hypocrite comes from the Greek, which refers to the mask an actor would wear on stage. These masks were always ornate and highly accentuated. This enabled the actor to clearly display the role or character they were embodying. Psychologically, Jung would call this a persona. A persona is neither good nor bad. It enables us to meet our external world, and it both reveals a small part of us, and functions to conceal the rest. If we over-identify with a persona, the face we show the world becomes fixed, ridged, and inflexible.

For example, if we over-identify with being nice and accommodating, the opposite (perhaps the potential to be mean and selfish) will expand and become less accessible to us. Then, what we deny in ourselves, we encounter in others, and treat them accordingly. Eventually, it becomes nearly impossible to see ourselves clearly. Next time you have a significant reaction to a quality or trait in someone else, ask: What in me and I seeing in them? Where is this quality present in my hidden life?

Would you rather be good or whole? (Read previous article: I’d Rather Be Whole Than Good: Healing the Ego-Shadow Split)

Shadow work is fundamentally about sacrificing our desire to be good for the sake of being whole. Goodness is one-sided, wholeness is bivalent. Goodness is aimed at perfection, while wholeness orients toward relationship and connection. What is good is typically cultural prescribed, but wholeness arrises from with each individual. Wholeness requires transgression of the collective definition of good, especially if it is colonizing the indigenous humanity within you. So, lean into your projections, feel them in your body, and bring them into your therapy session, your meditation or prayer time. Most of all get comfortable with the gift projection, judgements, and strong reactions to others. They are a gift for greater wholeness and will form you into a healing presence in the world!

Want to Engage Further?

1:1 Shadow Work: Want to do some inner work around your projections? Want to own back the parts of yourself you’ve placed onto others? Or perhaps you carry others’ projections. We can work on that too! I offer Virtual 1 on 1 Shadow Work for this work. The cost is $75/1 hour session. You can email me directly at [email protected] to schedule or get more info.
Jung’s Map of the Soul Workshop (via Zoom):
1. Friday October 11th, 9-11am PDT | $50 | Read More Details
2. Workshop Registration Form

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