The Proper Way Of A Woman

Last updated on: October 12, 2021 at 11:55 am by Chidimma Okafor

The Proper Way Of A Woman 2021-10-12T11:55:12+01:00 Chidimma Okafor

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According to biblical principles of the old and new testament, women are best placed under authority, ‘reliable authority’. The beauty of a woman does not only lie in her physical appearance but also in the kind of spirit and mind that she has. Women are feelers. They are emotional beings that relate to life majorly from their emotions and how they feel. They may not always have the ability to adopt a pragmatic approach towards things, hence, a woman is more prone to take drastic and sporadic measures on impulse or in the heat of a moment. These traits can also be found in some men who are not yet whole and stable within themselves. Either way, a woman’s creative energy is best managed and harnessed under authority..

Submission is a comfortable position for a woman to naturally and spontaneously assume when the male figures in her life are reliable. Every woman has her own dose of wisdom, knowledge and insight, therefore, before they can easily submit, they like being assured that the judgment of the supposed authority is sound and responsible. When a woman is not submitted to any authority, precisely a male covering, she tends to be erratic in her decision making process. Also, when a man fails to assume the place of reliable authority in a woman’s life, he will allow himself to be led by her which is totally out of place.

“So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate.” – Genesis 3:6

If Adam was in the right position of authority in which God had placed him, he would not have taken the fruit from Eve. Moreso, if Eve had assumed total submission to the authority of Adam over her, she will have excused herself from the serpent and go inquire from Adam, what she should do. So you see, both of them were not in their right positions. Man is always the covering of a woman and as such should be reliable in delivering his duties of protection, providence and guidance. Remember, it was not Eve that God gave the instruction to, He gave it to Adam because Adam represented and stood in for both of them.

“And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, “You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.” – Genesis 2: 16 – 17

You see.. but when the serpent came to Eve, he knew why He came to Eve. He knew that if he gets Eve, he has gotten Adam. He also knows how the mind of a woman works, a woman who has not submitted to any authority.

“Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden?” And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.” But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die.” – Genesis 3: 1-3

A modern day woman, especially one who is well educated will feel suppressed by these assertions of scripture. In the first letter of St.Paul to Timothy, he said that he suffers not a woman to teach, not to usurp authority over the man but to be in silence. Does this mean that all the women preachers of today are in the wrong? I do not think so. What I believe is that the demeanor of a woman who is submitted to authority is different from that of the woman who is not. The silence being commanded here is a way of beautifying our presence making it profound, graceful and comely. A person of few but carefully selected and well spoken words earns more respect and regard than a talkative. Any woman who knows how to submit to reliable authority is beautifying herself. How comely, graceful and fitly set? You might wonder why some women act and behave like men, being loud, robust, gregarious and masculine. What a sad manner of composure to behold?

Some women are naturally as hard and rough as rock whereas some became that way as a result of life experiences. Maybe they had no male covering at all, be it in the form of a father, brother, husband, uncle or religious leader. The men in their lives hurt them, abandoned them and were not there for them so in order to survive and protect themselves and their loved ones from anymore harm, they became tough and masculine. Men need to assume the place of authority that God gave to them in the garden of Eden, to provide, protect and to guide so that women can trust them enough to fall back and submit to their authority. Also, naturally masculine women should learn and ask God to give them the grace to be trusting enough to submit to reliable authority. That they learn to let go of being in control or in charge.

“Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening” – 1 Peter 3:3-6

Sarah called Abraham ‘Lord’ not because it was required of her but because Abraham made it easy for her to submit. He honored her, he loved her, he provided for her, he guided her and presented himself as a reliable man by his sound judgment and faith in God. She saw a lord in him first before she began to call him ‘Lord’. It is required of men to honor and respect the women in their lives, so as to make it easy for us to trust and submit. As regards comely speech best referred to as that of a woman:

“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” – Proverbs 25:11.

If you study the words of scripture, you will notice that anytime comely speech is talked about, it is described in the form of precious metals, stones and jewelry. Things women use to beautify themselves. If you look closer, in the book of Proverbs, you will realize that hidden in the words is the revelation that a woman is the embodiment of divine wisdom. How else is divine wisdom made known if not gently and when called for? Wisdom is being referred to as a feminine spirit that was with God from the time of creation even up till now.

“For whoso findeth me findeth life and shall obtain favour of the Lord” – Proverbs 8:35

“Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth favour of the Lord” – Proverbs 18:22

A woman is first a wife before the man finds her and makes her his own. In other words, you as a woman is first a wife, that is how your God ordained spouse can be able to recognize you as one and then claim you as his own. There is so much connection between the woman and the spirit of wisdom. Here is another example:

“For wisdom is better than rubies and all the things that may be desired are not to be compared to it” – Proverbs 8:11

“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies” – Proverbs 31:10

All through these verses, you will notice that wisdom and women are presented as something of immeasurable value that is not easy to be found by just anyone but a man who has been favored of God. So wisdom is a great blessing and a woman is also a great blessing. May God help us, both men and women, to walk in the full stature of the manhood and womanhood He has called us to walk in, in Jesus name, amen.

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