Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
Progressive Christian
Reflections One Year Post Retirement: Out of the Christian Bubble

Reflections One Year Post Retirement: Out of the Christian Bubble

Last updated on: March 13, 2018 at 10:01 am by Christy Thomas

Reflections One Year Post Retirement: Out of the Christian Bubble 2018-03-13T10:01:05-05:00 Christy Thomas

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

As I walked through those doors, I saw my Christian bubble becoming thinner, far more permeable to the words and ideas of others, and less attractive to me.

Note: this is the first of a three part post. Part Two: Into the Sapphire Bubble is here. Part Three, From the Personal to the Public, the UMC Disaster, is here.

On December 29, 2013, I said “goodbye” to the very much beloved congregation in Krum, TX, where I had served since 2006. Tears flowed freely–and I still miss them greatly.

But I had sensed a strong leading of the Spirit of God to enter into early retirement and devote more of my time to the other call, that of the writing life.

With awkward suddenness, a life that had been full of ministry and meetings, study and sermon prep, pastoral care and conference responsibilities, gardening and neighborhood friends became . . . still, and nearly blank.

I moved to an apartment in downtown Denton. I disposed of 2/3 of my possessions. I started taking long walks and began to relearn how to breathe and find my own rhythms again, long buried under other important and urgent matters.

While waiting, while recovering from a level of exhaustion so deep I had been unaware of its constant drain on me, I resolved to walk through doors that might open for me and explore all possibilities.

An invitation to be the keynote speaker at the Denton Democratic Party fundraiser helped me into the world of politics. A growing acquaintance with the moving force behind the eventually successful vote to ban fracking within Denton City limits gave me a taste of civic affairs. Time to attend and write about the Thin Line Film Festival and the giant springtime Jazz Festival opened my eyes to the arts community here.

I found my circle of friends expanding, and discovered that my long-time religion column in the Denton Record-Chronicle made me a minor celebrity, with many wanting to meet me and be in conversation with me.

Promised airplane tickets from my children materialized and gave me several weeks both in London, England and in New York City, reveling in family love and cultural opportunities.

Another friend and I drove to Fort Collins, CO, and enjoyed the hospitality of a great friend there as well as opportunities to hike in Rocky Mountain National Forest.

Yet one more friend, hearing that I wanted to spend some time with my brother in Southern California, offered me the upstairs of her lovely condo for as long as I wanted it. She just happened to live about four miles from my brother’s house, in close proximity to long hiking trails and just 20 minutes from the beach.

During those weeks in California, my brother and I entered into the process of my becoming a kidney donor for him, again walking into unfamiliar medical territory of tests and delays and decisions out of my hands and control.

As I walked through those doors, I saw my Christian bubble becoming thinner, far more permeable to the words and ideas of others, and less attractive to me.

What finally popped the bubble, however, was a decision, spurred mostly by deep curiosity, to join an online dating service.

Yeah. I did it. And it was NOT E-harmony or Christian Mingle. Nope. Went for the wider world and joined Match.

I had been a singles pastor in the early 2000’s, about the time that online dating was becoming a greater force in connecting people, and church a less likely place to meet potential mates. I cared deeply about my singles then, and now . . . as I was unexpectedly single again, I wanted to know the world they faced.

I met some wonderful people–and certainly had interactions with those who were not so wonderful. Made some intriguing friends, and learned much about the essentially uncomfortable online world of the older single female and the far more pleasurable online world for the older single males. The latter are in great demand; the former, not so much, especially former clergywomen with multiple advanced degrees.

Late summer, however, one of those older singles males sent me an email, wanting to start a conversation. I looked at his online profile and knew I would never have contacted him had I seen it first. But I had made a decision that I would be polite and respond to all emails.

I agreed to meet him, mostly out of courtesy, but nearly canceled it an hour before we were to meet. Little in his profile seemed like a fit–he was too much older, very conservative politically, with a south Philadelphia accent (think: Click and Clack, of Car Talk) and with an income gap too wide to be breached.

He was outside the demographic I had decided would be right for me. He was outside my financial comfort zone. He was outside my auditory experience zone. As for religion: Polish/Jewish heritage, reared Roman Catholic, never read the Bible, shaped only by occasional Eucharistic practice, so very much outside my experience zone.

We are now into our fourth month of delightfully dating each other.

Part Two: Into the Sapphire Bubble

Part Three: From the Personal to the Public, the UMC disaster

The United Methodist Church

traditional vs progressive Christianity

UMC

Previous Post

December 17, 2014

Denton Mystery Worship Eleven: Reflections on The Messiah and Methodism

Next Post

December 19, 2014 Part Two: Into the Sapphire Bubble

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category " obedience abortion accommodation accountability administration adolescence Advent advice an ordinary death anxiety apology apportionments Ash Wednesday ask thoughtfulpastor baptism betrayal Bible bondage calling certainty change character charity children Christianity Christmas church church as garden clergy clergy credentials closure comfort compassion competition compromise Confirmation conservation conservative conspiracy theories consumer conversion coronavirua corruption courage covenant cultural context death Deconstruction discipleship discord divorce doctrine doing good drugs dysfunctional Easter Easter; Resurrection education election entertainment envy escape evaluation evil exclusive church exercise faith faithfulness family fasting fear feast featured film review finances first world problem food forgiveness fundamentalist garden gay marriage General Conference generosity giving thanks GLBT glory good government grace guilt habit happy harmony hateful acts healing health health care heaven hell hello/goodbye heresy hidden agenda holiness homelessness homosexuality humility hymn hypocrisy Imago Dei In training inclusive church indulgence injustice innocents insurance intolerance itinerancy joy Justice kindness Kingdom of Heave kingdom of heaven language laughter laundry lawsuit leadership Lent LGBTQ liberal life Little Things Matter longform meandering thoughts memories mercy metaphor metrics miracle misfortunes morality Mormon Muslim mystery worship natural disasters New Category Name nutrients older adults oppression pain Paleo paperwork partnered pastor peace pension pharmaceutical placebo politics poverty prayer privilege public schools questions quiet racism rain reason reconciliation religion repentance requirements rescue respect rest resurrection retirement Sabbath sacrament sacred salvation same-sex marriage sanctuary schism schooling science SCOTUS secrecy separation of church and state sexism sexuality short cuts silence sin sleep soil spiritual journey stillness suffering surgery sustainable church teacher technology thank you theology therapy thinking tolerance TOS trust truth Uncategorized welcome Why Easter? wisdom women worship

Select a Month October 2026 September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 May 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 December 2025 October 2025 September 2025 July 2025 June 2025 March 2025 February 2025 December 2024 November 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 April 2024 March 2024 January 2024 December 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 October 2022 September 2022 July 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 October 2021 July 2021 June 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 January 2020 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 July 2007 March 2007

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz