Reflections on a Ballroom Floor: What I Learned from Dance Class

Last updated on: November 11, 2015 at 2:03 am by Dean

Reflections on a Ballroom Floor: What I Learned from Dance Class 2015-11-11T02:03:40-05:00 Dean

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Slow. Slow. Quick-quick.

This formulation sticks in my head more than anything I’ve learned in the weeks of ballroom dance lessons my wife signed us up for. That’s good, since these four steps are the cornerstone of the dances we’ve studied.

We’ve learned to foxtrot. We’ve learned to waltz. We learned the meringue. All of which are easier than you’d think.

We’ve also learned the triple-time jitterbug, a dance no sane person would ever dance voluntarily since after about four minutes it begins to feel like a forced march in wartime.

Slipping around the gymnasium floor beneath the buzz of fluorescent lights provides lots of time to think. The inescapable conclusion I’ve come to is that ballroom dance is a unique symbol of the home we all long for, especially as it emphasizes order, union and transcendence.

ORDER

Our teachers are cool people in their 70’s. They make the class. Former competitive dancers, their skill and age make them seem like people from another world. In some ways they are. They’ve lived through a great change.

The last fifty years, at least, of American life have been times of increasing social disorder. The guidelines society once provided on how to live, what it meant to be a man or a woman, how to be moral, these have all been ripped up, thrown out, and replaced with a hodgepodge of feel-good platitudes and subjective pieties.

The sexual revolution, perhaps especially as it manifested itself in no-fault divorce, has led to chaos in the lives of millions. Changes in technology and the economy have added to the general social disarray.

Ballroom dance is a souvenir of a time before the collapse. We associate it with a more structured and pleasant era. But, there is more than mere association afoot. Structure is the essence of ballroom. The ordered nature of the movements is married in time to the ordered structure of the music, and the result is something that can’t but order the souls involved. In this sense, the dance makes the dancer.

UNION

The dance orders not just the souls and bodies of the individual dancers, but their relation to one another. Everybody knows the man leads, and ballroom gets a bad rap for this. All these formal, partnered dances, we’re told, reflect the patriarchal past all good people are now ashamed of. The woman in these dances, we are to believe, is a mere accessory, some passive thing whose job is to stay out the man’s way. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Though she is responding to her male partner’s lead, she is an equally necessary part of the dance. Without her, the whole thing would fall apart just as much as it would without him.

By dividing roles, the dance opens the door to union. When the roles are clear and both people are fulfilling them, the dance rolls on smoothly. Partners glide, separate, turn and come together and never miss a beat. The metaphor for the larger scope of the relations between the sexes is obvious. The result of living out our roles in the dance is an experience of moving in unity with another person that is rare in our chaotic culture.

TRANSCENDENCE

When the music plays and the man steps forward and the woman steps back, a kind of mystery is revealed. Like all mysteries, this one is hard to put into words. All I can do is describe the conditions under which it sometimes appears.

Moving smoothly in connection with another lifts you up in the presence of music, the most transcendent of all art forms. With a little practice and discipline, the dance leads to a fleeting moment of self-forgetting when everything is all speed, and togetherness and beauty.

Like all moments when we move out of ourselves enough to glimpse a different reality, one where we are more at home, this one doesn’t last. But, it may come again. In the meantime, you can chase it. All you have to do is submit yourself to the order, conform yourself to the structure, pay careful attention to your partner, and put your best foot forward.

_____________________________________________

Thank you for reading this post. If you found it valuable, please share it on social media using one of the buttons below. You may also want to support my work by leaving a tip in the tip jar on the main page or by supporting me on Patreon.

An Approximate Home

Community

Family

Previous Post

November 4, 2015

Don't Be Afraid to Have Standards: Dating Advice for Young Women

Next Post

November 13, 2015 Stop Playing it Safe: Dating Advice for Young Men

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category An Approximate Home Character Community Faith Family masculinity Memory Parenting Place Podcast Resources and Reviews Reviews Simplicity Society The Economics of Home Building Uncategorized

Select a Month September 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 March 2015 February 2015 December 2014 October 2014 September 2014 July 2014

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What does Jesus say will set you free?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Money The truth Fame Power