{"id":718,"date":"2018-03-30T01:08:01","date_gmt":"2018-03-30T05:08:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/admin.patheos.com\/blogs\/themuslimhippie\/?p=718"},"modified":"2018-03-30T01:08:01","modified_gmt":"2018-03-30T05:08:01","slug":"bipolar-strong","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/themuslimhippie\/2018\/03\/30\/bipolar-strong\/","title":{"rendered":"Bipolar Strong"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>

<\/p>\n

WORLD BIPOLAR DAY<\/p>\n

I had my first bipolar breakdown in the classroom where I was teaching in College Park, Maryland. I knew something was wrong, when I found myself screaming at the top of my lungs in the classroom again. I saw the tiny faces of my students staring back at me, full of bewilderment, and I was crushed. I\u2019d done it again. I decided to change the subject and get myself together. We started discussing with their parents did for a living. That calmed me down. \u201cI can do this\u201d, I thought. One girl said her father was a psychiatrist, and I almost leapt over the desks. I ran to her and asked for his business card. I made up an excuse and I knew she didn\u2019t believe me. Yet I continued with the discussion. I called him the next day for an emergency appointment. This was the beginning of my work with the doctor. I was his patient until 3 months ago.<\/p>\n

When I made the appointment, he initially diagnosed me with ADHD and anxiety. That is how my symptoms presented to him. About\u00a0six months later<\/span>,\u00a0I was diagnosed with bipolar 1. I\u2019d had a manic episode. I\u2019d mowed my lawn six different times\u00a0in one day<\/span> and I\u2019d stayed up for a few days in a row. I remember my next-door neighbor asked me why I was mowing my lawn so often, and if I wanted to let my lawn grow back before I mowed it again. I felt sad and ashamed that she could see that I was so sick. She also asked me about my tattoos. I was relieved that she didn\u2019t ask me about my cutting scars. I hid a lot back then. I wasn\u2019t open like I am now. For me, living with bipolar means taking my medicine, going to the doctors, going to bed early, eating healthy, walking and a host of other self-care items. I must take care of myself if I want to stay healthy. Sometimes I have episodes and breakdowns but in general, I am much better than I have been in the past thankfully. I am grateful for that.<\/p>\n<\/body><\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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