Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

The Dude Abides

Home
Progressive Christian
GODSTUFF: Rapture Practice!

GODSTUFF: Rapture Practice!

Last updated on: March 10, 2015 at 10:03 am by Cathleen Falsani

GODSTUFF: Rapture Practice! 2015-03-10T10:03:23-07:00 Cathleen Falsani

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

EDITOR’S NOTE: In the event that Christian radio evangelist Harold Camping is correct and the Rapture does indeed occur on Saturday (May 21), please ignore the following. Except for the section marked “Tribulation Check List.”

On your drive to Costco this weekend to restock your cache of toilet paper, hummus and Diet Snapple, if you see a car with a bumper sticker that reads, “In case of Rapture, this vehicle will be unmanned,” give it a wide berth.

Just in case.

Back in 2009, Camping (who will turn 90 in July if he doesn’t meet Jesus in the sky this weekend), announced that, after years of Bible study and complicated mathematical figuring, he had determined that the Rapture will take place on May 21, 2011 followed by the end of the world (aka Apocalypse/Doomsday) on October 21.

Now that the date is nearly upon us, Camping’s prediction is gaining traction in some quarters. Some of Camping’s followers have quit their jobs (and their churches), sold their homes and given away their worldly possessions. The final countdown has begun and they’re ready to go.

The “Rapture” is an event many Christians believe is described in 1 Thessalonians 4, where St. Paul writes, “And the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.”

For millennia, Christians have debated when, where and how that event will take place. There are many competing schools of thought, some saying the Rapture will occur before a period of “tribulation” on the earth, marked by violence, natural catastrophes, plagues and general

horribleness. In this view, Jesus will scoop up the faithful and take them to heaven before the holy, um, stuff hits the fan down below.

Others say the Rapture will take place in the middle of the seven-year Tribulation. Still others believe it will come at the end of the Tribulation, or at some other point in time, or that those

“raptured” don’t go to heaven, but instead to a designated spot on earth.

Generally speaking, though, trying to guess the actual date of the Rapture is considered a theological faux pas: Another verse in 1 Thessalonians says Jesus will return for his faithful “like a thief in the night.” In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus himself seems to put the kibosh on predictions of his return, saying, “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”

Still, that hasn’t stopped Camping and other likeminded folks throughout the ages from trying to figure it out.

This isn’t the first time Camping has prognosticated about what is commonly called in Christian circles the “End Times.” In 1992, Camping published a book called “1994?” in which he predicted the end of the world as we know it would arrive in September 1994. When it didn’t —

awkward! — Camping said he’d made a mistake in his mathematical computations. (I hate when that happens.)

Camping and his crew believe that when the Rapture happens, 200 million people will be “caught up” — about 3 percent of the world’s population. The other 97 percent of humanity will be left to fend for themselves amidst trials and tribulations heretofore unimagined, until Oct. 21, when the final curtain falls.

More than 23,000 people have joined a Facebook group that’s promoting cheery soirees for May 22 — a kind of spiritual equivalent of pre-Apocalyptic alternative proms for those not invited to the dance.

“Turn that frown upside down,” the “Post Rapture Party” group urges its members. “Here’s an invitation to the party of all parties. Why? Because on the Day After Judgment Day we’ll finally have the world to ourselves without those wackadoodle Fundies in our faces. Let’s party!!”

If you are reading this on Sunday and the neighborhood seems strangely quiet, you’ve probably been left behind. Here are a few helpful hints to consider before heading to your post-Rapture picnic.

Tribulation Check List:

1) Now is the time to settle on a definitive “desert island” play list of your favorite albums.

2) Rent a copy of the movie, “A Thief in the Night.”

3) Buy sunscreen (SPF 50 or greater.)

4) Hoard bottled water.

5) Download “War and Peace” to your e-reader, load the latest edition of “Angry Birds” on your iPhone, and grab the family Bible. (You’re going to have some time to kill.)

6) Cancel your subscriptions to The Economist and The New Yorker. (You still won’t have enough time to read them through before the next issue arrives, and they’ll just keep piling up, making you feel guilty.)

7) Redeem your Frequent Flyer miles.

8) Update iTunes.

9) Seek shelter (preferably in a remote cave.)

10) Change your Facebook status to “left behind.”

This column was originally published via the Religion News Service.

Religion News Service

Previous Post

May 12, 2011

GODSTUFF: "Thor" and discovering God(s) in Marvel(ous) places

Next Post

May 20, 2011 Book News: GG gives an inside peek at Belieber! (a work in progress)

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category A little happy ARCHIVED COLUMNS BECOMING FAMILY BelieberNess BREAKING NEWS! Disquiet Time DJ JEFF'S SPINTASMS falsani FILM from OCRegister From Sojo.net God Nods GODSTUFF I Take Requests incubatespirit LURKING IN THE NARTHEX On My Nightstand ONEMOMS Polling the Room PONTIFEXCELLENT Thru My Eyes TWO CENTS Uncategorized Upcoming Events VASCO VASCO'S HEART

Select a Month January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 July 2014 May 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 April 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 March 2004 February 2004 January 2004 December 2003 October 2003 March 2003 December 2002 October 2002 January 2001

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What does Paul say is the wages of sin?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Death Separation from God Hell Punishment