Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
New Visions
Being with Jackson

Being with Jackson

Last updated on: July 11, 2021 at 6:45 am by Karl J. Forehand

Being with Jackson 2021-07-11T06:45:23-06:00 Karl J. Forehand

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Jackson and Papa

This my grandson, Jackson Bennett Holmes. I used to call him J.B., but now we call him Jack. It reminds me that there is this new thing going on where grandparents name themselves. For instance, our names are Mimi and Papa even though I dreamed about being called, “Grandpa.” Whatever happened to that and why didn’t I get consulted on this thing?

Anyway, Jackson is staying over for a day or so and last night I got to sit with him on the porch. Mimi really does all the work when the grandkids come over. I have good intentions, but she loses sleep over the grandkids coming over and she’s ultimately in charge — I’m just glad they post a picture of me on Facebook or Instagram with the grandkids like I actually did something to help.

But occasionally, I get to do a little project with the grandkids like gardening or building something with modeling clay, or in the case of Jackson, sitting and listening to music. It’s kind of our thing. He likes the band Tuba Skinny the best, but he will listen to about anything soulful or modern folk. He especially likes the horns*.* Sometimes, we both kind of just doze off until other people in the house feel like we need to do something.

Jackson has some developmental challenges. I won’t go into all of them, but most kids his age would be starting to perform. We would be asking them to say something or show off the latest thing they’ve learned. We can’t help ourselves, but the vibe is different with Jack. We are mostly content just to be together. I don’t know if he feels as strongly about it as I do, but he seems to be in agreement.

Yesterday, while my daughter and Mimi went to the store, we just sat on the front porch and watched birds flutter around and listened to the rain. Winston the Wonder Dog hid under our chair – because it’s raining and there was a little thunder!.

Whether it is Jackson or Mimi, it is a great relief for me to exist without people having requirements of me and without me have expectations of them. One of my new practices is Centering Prayer, where I enter a kind of inner stillness and sit with the Divine without having any expectations or agenda. It is tremendously helpful, and it releases me from demanding or expecting from the other, even if that other entity is God.

I don’t really know how to explain the exchange of energy that happens when we stop using things and people to meet our expectations and we simply allow ourselves to “Be with…” whatever exists in our presence. In the Bible, God expresses “I am,” which means “I exist.” The fact that we and other things and beings exists is not only factual, it’s important. Existing together is not a copout for some kind of action — it’s the one thing that can make a huge difference in our self-care and spiritual lives.

So, Jackson and I weren’t wasting time on the porch last night. The trendy term is “making space” for each other. I don’t know if he understands this intellectually, but he seems to get it intuitively.

There were times this past week, when we visited friends in Florida, that we stopped talking and doing and just looked out at the seashore together or watched a ghost crab venturing out to find food.

Some people call it being and becoming because these moments when we can allow ourselves to be where we are (presence) and be who we are (authenticity) actually help us grow and progress forward in this journey we are on. Sometimes doing is just a performance based on what we already know — Being teaches us so much more!

I hope you will investigate some of these things in my new book, Being: A Journey Toward Presence and Authenticity and I hope you have someone like Jackson to be with on a stormy night. If you don’t have a person consider being with nature and all that that entails. Even Winston the Wonder Dog feeds my soul occasionally.

Be where you are, be who you are,

Karl Forehand

Order Being: A Journey Toward Presence and Authentic

Karl Forehand is a former pastor, podcaster, and award-winning author. His books include Apparent Faith: What Fatherhood Taught Me About the Father’s Heart and The Tea Shop. He is the creator of The Desert Sanctuary podcast. He is married to his wife Laura of 32 years and has one dog named Winston. His three children are grown and are beginning to multiply!

**Support us on Patreon * The Desert Sanctuary Website**

Previous Post

July 10, 2021

Being with My Past

Next Post

July 24, 2021 "You're Still Cool"

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Abuse Addiction Advent adventure Alpha Male Animals Answers Attachment Attitude authenticity Authenticty Authentiicity Awareness being Bible Black Community BLM body awarenss book Books Bravery Bullying Bypassing Certainty Certianty Chamge change children Christianity Christmas Church Comfort community Compaasion Compassion Complementarian Complementarianism Conditioning Consciousness Contemplation Control Conversation Converstations Covid-19 Creation Darkness Death Debate deconstruction demons depression desert Devil Disciples discussion Divine dreams Easter Eclipse Empathy Essence evolution evolve faith fatherhood Fear fiction Flood Focus Focusing Focussing Future Genesis Goals God Gratitude grief growth Guns Hate healing Health Heart Hell Holiday Hypnosis ignorance Improvement infallible Inner Child Integrity Intuition Jesus Jezebel Journey King LGBTQ+ Love MAGA Marriage meditation Men Mercy Message metaphysical Mindfulness Misogyny Mourning Music Mystic mystical Narcissism Nationalism Nature New Year Novel Nutrition Organization other Pain Pandemic parenting Pastors Patriarchy Patriotism Personal Growth Plan Poet poets Police politics Power practice praise Prayer presence pro-life Problem Solving Progress prolife Prophet prophets Purity Culture Purpose Queer Questions Racism Rape Rapture reconstruction Recovery Religion Resolutions Restoration Resurrection Retribution Reviews Root Cause Sanctuary Satan SBC Scripture Seeking Self-Care Self-esteem Seminary Sex Shadow shame social justice social media solitude Spirits Spirituality stillness Story Survivor Thanksgiving Theologians Theology Tradition Trauma travel Trump Uncategorized Unchurching Universe Violence Vision Voice Volunteer Vulnerability War Women Word worship Writing

Select a Month September 2026 August 2026 June 2026 May 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Who received the Ten Commandments from God?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Abraham Joshua Aaron Moses

Books by This Author Books by The Desert Sanctuary

See All Titles »