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2021-11-02T11:27:42-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
The Importance of Positive Reinforcement in Your Relationship
Last updated on: November 2, 2021 at 11:27 am By Terry Gaspard
During our couples counseling sessions, Kylie, 48, complains about Justin’s, 50, lack of love and attention. She feels like they are roommates and that he rarely gives her praise for being a loving and supportive wife. Likewise, Justin, feels neglected by Kylie at times because she “shuts down” when she feels annoyed or hurt. This creates a vicious cycle of withdrawal and frustration. When this happens, neither one of them is getting their needs met. Kylie puts it like this:... Read more
2021-06-19T16:58:44-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
6 Signs of an Emotionally Healthy Relationship
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:58 pm By Terry Gaspard
Caitlin, an outgoing teacher, 35, came to my office for counseling recently and discussed her tendency to pick unsuitable partners. She says, “I always tend to go for men who are emotionally distant. I think it’s because I fear getting hurt and so it allows me to protect myself. I’ve been hurt too many times and I’m wary of exposing myself to emotional pain.” Many people waste time with partners who are not a good match for them. This trend... Read more
2021-06-19T16:50:46-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
How to Deal with Baggage from Former Relationships
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:50 pm By Terry Gaspard
Many of my clients who come to my office for marriage counseling complain that baggage from former relationships weighs them down and that they are easily triggered by their partner’s behaviors. As a result, they unknowingly sabotage their marriage. For instance, Amy, 38, and John, 40, have been married for ten years but their union is often rocky because Amy has difficulty dealing with conflict and threatens to leave when they disagree. In their breakthrough book, Conscious Loving, Dr.’s Gay... Read more
2021-06-19T16:59:37-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
Self-compassion Can Help Couples Communicate Effectively
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:59 pm By Terry Gaspard
Carolyn, 42, sits across from her husband, Henry, 45, in my office, as they discuss their challenges with candor and empathy. Since Henry was laid off from his job as a restaurant manager, during the COVID-19 pandemic, they have struggled with finances while raising three children on one salary. As we discuss ways to manage stress and reduce their spending, Carolyn expresses concern for Henry’s well-being. Carolyn put it like this: “Henry is a wonderful father and husband and has... Read more
2021-06-19T16:51:42-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
5 Questions to Ask Potential Marital Partners
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:51 pm By Terry Gaspard
Who we choose to marry is one of the most important and costliest decisions a person will make, yet it’s not uncommon for lovers to make errors in judgment. Why does this happen? One reason is that most of us aren’t raised with a healthy template of marriage to follow. We also lack self-awareness and may be afraid of ending up alone. Taking a closer look at a potential partners’ beliefs, values, and expectations will set you up for a... Read more
2021-06-19T16:57:30-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
5 Tips for to Help Your Children Become Resilient After Divorce
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:57 pm By Terry Gaspard
Many studies show that being raised in a high-conflict divorced family can cause children to have low self-esteem and feelings of unworthiness. It can leave him or her with the ultimate feeling of rejection. Many kids internalize the breakup of their families and feel it’s their fault. Children soak up everything they see, feel, and hear. Parents may believe they are giving their children all the love they need, but they send a conflicting message when they fail to reconcile their own relationships with their former partners.... Read more
2021-05-02T14:17:28-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
A Mother’s Day Message for Divorced Moms of Daughters
Last updated on: May 2, 2021 at 2:17 pm By Terry Gaspard
While boundaries are important in any relationship, they are especially critical for mothers and daughters after the breakup of a family. Since I was raised by a mother who gave birth to four daughters and struggled with boundary issues, this topic has always interested me. As a therapist, I’ve also noticed that if women are unaware of transmitting a narrative of betrayal and abandonment to their daughters after divorce, a legacy of negativity and mistrust can be passed on. As... Read more
2021-06-19T16:54:46-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
6 Tips for Improving Communication and Creating Loving Intimacy
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:54 pm By Terry Gaspard
During our couples counseling sessions, Kyla and Kevin discuss their difficulties communicating their needs productively. It seems like they have the same arguments over and over again and they are often left feeling frustrated. Ongoing bickering and miscommunication is a common theme in many of my couples counseling sessions and I often research the topic to help couples reconnect. In a recent article for The Gottman Institute’s website, psychotherapist Nicole Schiener, looks at the roots and repercussions of communication issues... Read more
2021-06-19T16:54:09-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
7 Ways to Ignite Sexual Passion with Your Partner
Last updated on: June 19, 2021 at 4:54 pm By Terry Gaspard
The most common complaint of couples that I work with today is that they have fallen out of love and that the passion has dwindled between them. However, falling out of love usually does not occur overnight. Likewise, relationship repair takes time and effort on the part of both partners and includes rekindling sexual intimacy and emotional attunement. Fortunately, here are many ways for couples to fall back in love and ending a habit of criticizing each other is a... Read more
2021-04-11T22:38:43-04:00
Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.
Seeing Boundaries In A New Light
Last updated on: April 11, 2021 at 10:38 pm By Terry Gaspard
After years of seeing and helping patients with boundary issues, I began researching the topic to gain clarity and information. Many of my clients need assistance in setting clearer boundaries in relationships. They complain that they often give too much to others, feel depleted, and have trouble saying “no” to others. For example, Nina, 50, a client of mine (fictitious name) often spends endless hours running errands for her mother, Susan, age 75. Even if she has her own work... Read more
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