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December 2017

December 11, 2017

Santa Claus and the Broken Gift

I never knew how I'd broach the truth about Santa to my daughter, Rosie....

December 10, 2017

Comfort and Joy in Downtown Steubenville

I was recently informed by a disgruntled reader that I "literally threw the entire...

December 07, 2017

Meet the Advent-o-Saurs!

I don't know exactly whose idea it was to come up with an Adventosaurus. My friend...

December 03, 2017

How the Grinch Stole David Bowie

It was bound to happen at some time or other. I'm sorry that it happened...

November 2017

November 23, 2017

Notes For An Elegant Thanksgiving

Gobble Gobble, everyone! It's time to talk turkey with some entertaining tips from the Marchioness...

November 13, 2017

Fast Food Virtues

I never in a million years thought I'd be defending the Slumgullion-in-chief. I defended...

November 09, 2017

Mrs. Pezzulo and Ramona

My daughter has been on a Beverly Cleary bender, lately. Don't get me wrong, I...

November 08, 2017

What’s For Dinner? Volume Three

I did it. I finally did it. I successfully made and ate stew. We almost...

October 2017

October 31, 2017

Halloween Rundown 2017

Halloween is over at last, leaving us all sad until next year. Time to...

October 30, 2017

Last-Minute Halloween Advice From Steel Magnificat

It's All Hallow's Eve Eve! The most wonderful time of the year! I am so...

October 26, 2017

An Accidental Cosplay

I was having a terrible day. It all started with an advertising circular that...

October 26, 2017

Swinging for Chastity

When I was a teenager, in that strange homeschool group where we kept ourselves pure from the...

October 22, 2017

Ten Further Church Buzzwords That Ought to Be Banned

A priest by the name of Father Alexander Lucie-Smith, with whom I'm not familiar, recently...

September 2017

September 20, 2017

Rebecca Bratten Weiss Drops the Mic

As has been widely reported, my dear friend Rebecca Bratten Weiss was recently dismissed from...

September 12, 2017

A Library for the Friendship Room

I went down to The Friendship Room with Rose, to drop off our widow's...

August 2017

August 17, 2017

How Will We Preserve History Without Confederate Statues?

I have compiled a brief and non-exhaustive list of ways in which the United States...

August 12, 2017

They Seemed Like Mountains

It's odd, sometimes, how little things bring a series of memories back. Rose...

July 2017

July 22, 2017

Deacon Jim’s Blunder: The Actual Definition of “Orthophobia”

Our old friend Deacon Jim is at it again. Jim Russell, a persistent man whom...

July 15, 2017

When Is It Okay to Tell a Woman She’s in Great Shape?

We're going to answer an age-old question which has been all over the news lately:...

July 11, 2017

Watty Piper’s Mechanical Dystopia: Looking Back At “The Little Engine That Could”

There are stories that only improve with age. And then there's Watty Piper's 1930 fable,...

July 09, 2017

How To Write A Listicle

It seems like nothing gets published these days unless it's in listicle format. In...

July 06, 2017

The Firework People

There was an enormous explosion up the street. "That one's got to be illegal," I...

July 04, 2017

The Infamous Fourth of July Backyard Extravaganza

I'm pretty famous for telling horrendous stories about my childhood on the Planet Charismatic. How...

June 2017

June 30, 2017

Some Say Peter

There are saints who seem like strangers to me, and Peter and Paul go into...

June 26, 2017

Notes from Notre Dame (Part Three)

I woke up on Saturday morning and stuffed an overpriced Kind bar in my mouth. Then...

June 25, 2017

Notes from Notre Dame (Part Two)

(Yes, I am aware that this image is of the wrong Notre Dame.) I woke...

June 22, 2017

Notes from Notre Dame (Part One)

Somehow, Patheos sent a hack like me to the Trying To Say God Conference at the...

June 17, 2017

What’s For Dinner? Part Two

"What's for Dinner?" is a shameless aping of Simcha Fisher's "What's for Supper?" I...

June 04, 2017

What’s for Dinner?

What's for dinner is a shameless aping of Simcha Fisher's regular feature "What's for Supper?"...

May 2017

May 26, 2017

The Adventures of Tony, Cap, Donald and Bigfoot

My daughter does not play with Barbies. That's not for lack of exposure; she has...