Mantilla the Hon on Modern Churches

I am thinking about these American Catholic churches hon.

They are all comfortable with padding in the seats. Let me tell you hon, these Americans have enough padding in their seats already. You know what I mean? Most of them are mucho grande–and especially they are big south of the border. You know?

So these Americans need more padding in their seats? Maybe or maybe not. They have churches that are round and the altar is on a stage with stage lights and all these things. Then Father celebrates the Mass and he remind me of these smiling men on TV who don’t look real. They have these sun tans and hair that is sprayed and straight teeth. What is this with the Americans and straight teeth? If you ask me hon, it makes some of them look like a horse. They are always grinning with their teeth.

So I am thinking about these churches and what is wrong with them and then I realize what it is. They are thinking that a church is just a place for people to sit and see Mass happen and maybe listen to Father talk about going to the beach or tell jokes or something. You know what I mean hon? But the churches we have in Espana–these are not built to be places to go and listen to somebody give a homily. This is what the Protestants do. Our churches are God’s house. Jesus lives there in the little tabernacle. So we make God’s house beautiful because heaven is beautiful. You know what I mean hon? We make the churches last a long time because heaven is forever. This is the problem with the Americans. They are always looking for entertainment so they turn their churches into theaters, but the church is not a theater hon!

I remember Monsignor Quixote at Salamanca telling us that a church is like a temple. It is not a place where the people come to meet. You can do that at a restaurant or a club or a theater. No. The church is not a meeting place. It is God’s house. We go there not to meet each other, but to meet God. OK, hon, nothing wrong with meeting each other too, and maybe you want to stay behind and eat a Krispy Kreme donut and drink coffee which they do in America which is a nice idea, but that’s not the main thing.

So I am telling Augusto about this because you know we are planning to get married this summer and he say, “You’re right about that Mantilla..and this is why I am wanting to marry you in church–because this is God’s temple like you say, and this beautiful church remind me of you because you are God’s temple too.” Then he is starting to come close and take my mantilla off so I am having to slap him and then I stamp my foot like I do sometime, and he starts calling me his pretty little toro…

Never mind about that. What I am really saying hon, is that I am hoping these Americans start to build a beautiful churches again. So I ask my friend over there Father Longenecker who write this blog, and he tell me he is trying to build a beautiful church, but it not easy. This I think is crazy, they are the richest peoples on the earth and richer than anyone has ever been and then he tell me that the people are not wanting to build a beautiful church because it costs too much money.

Let me tell you something hon–these are peoples who have great big houses that cost a million dollars and they have a beach house and lake house too. This makes me pretty mad hon, and I think one day they are going to find themselves not in their own house, but in a hot house.

You know what I mean hon?

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