Caitlin O’Rourke on St Joseph

Last updated on: December 24, 2014 at 12:50 pm by Fr. Dwight Longenecker

Caitlin O’Rourke on St Joseph 2014-12-24T12:50:58-05:00 Fr. Dwight Longenecker

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The history book slipped honest it did I was trying to throw it over to Flora when Jimmy Pochowski thought I was throwing at him and then he ducked but in the wrong direction and he wasn’t hurt that bad and when he cried I know I shouldn’t have laughed but his face looked so funny all scrunched up like a baby and my brother Evan doesn’t cry like that even the time I shot him with the BB gun he just yelled and hit me back but he didn’t cry like a big fat baby and then Sister made me stay in at recess but I don’t care because I was able to sit in the chapel where there is a very nice statue of St Joseph and baby Jesus and I knew I was right that St Joseph says we don’t have to give up what we gave up for Lent today because I had a ham sandwich and was eating chocolate cake at lunchtime and I told Flora she could have some too and Jimmy told us that we couldn’t and that he knew because he was an altar server and that girls couldn’t be altar servers so he knew more about it which isn’t true anyway because Sister told us that St Theresa of Avila loved baby Jesus and St Joseph and she was a girl and she was a doctor of the church which means she could take people’s temperatures and things like that and she even showed us a picture of St Theresa wearing a biretta like Fr. Florsheim’s which means she was very important and I told Jimmy and he said that girls could never wear birettas and I said yes they could too and then he told me I was a dumb girl who didn’t know anything and I shouldn’t have stuck my tongue out to him but I did and then he did something bad with his middle finger which I will not even tell you about because it would cause scandal if I did but that’s when I threw my history book to Flora but it slipped and hit him instead and then I was the one who got the detention because he started crying which made me look bad and I don’t think is fair but I don’t care because when I was done I lit a candle to St Joseph and said an act of contrition which Sister Mary Albert taught me to do and I promised to go to confession tomorrow and tell Jesus and he will forgive me and I’m glad Fr Florsheim has school confessions because I always like it and feel close to Jesus when I’m there and I thank him that Sister Joan isn’t here anymore and is in a rest home for old nuns because she stopped school confessions and told us we don’t have to go to confession because Jesus loves us and forgives us anyway which Aunt Margaret says is a load of horse poop because you have to ask for forgiveness or its not forgiveness and anyway I said a prayer for Sister Joan too that God would make her happy making braided rugs which is what Aunt Margaret said she was probably doing all day with the other old nuns and that it might just keep her out of trouble for once.

Caitlin O'Rourke

Alter Egos

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