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How Many Before Mary? An Advent Tale of Consent

How Many Before Mary? An Advent Tale of Consent

Last updated on: December 12, 2025 at 4:15 pm by Teresa Blythe

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How Many Before Mary? An Advent Tale of Consent 2025-12-12T16:15:17-08:00 Teresa Blythe

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Before the teenaged Mary said YES to the angel Gabriel’s invitation to give birth to God’s son, how many young women took a pass? Consent can never be coerced. If you will be punished for saying NO, it’s not consent. So, when 15-year-old Abby considered the invitation and preferred to marry her fiancé and have his baby, Gabriel smiled and said, “No worries, Abby. If it’s not your calling, it will be someone else’s, and that’s OK. You are still deeply loved and cherished by God.” As he left her house, he offered her peace.

14-year-old Ramona looked Gabriel straight in the eye. “Are you kidding me? I’m not ready to be anyone’s mother! But thanks for thinking of me.” Again, Gabriel smiled sweetly, gave her a hug and thanked her for being so clear with him. “It’s definitely a job that’s not for every woman,” he said. He noticed she looked distressed, so he reassured her that this didn’t mean God was upset with her. And he peaced-out.

Gabriel then went to visit Dottie, who, at 16, was a little older and very smart. “Dottie, would you be willing to bear the son of God?” he asked. “What does it involve?” she asked. Gabriel explained what he could, but Dottie had to be honest. She asked, “Do I even know this God you work for?” Gabriel laughed. “God knows and loves you. Isn’t that what matters?” She wrinkled her nose and began to worry that if she did not agree to this proposal, she might be cast into darkness (whatever that meant—she wasn’t sure). “No, not at all,” said the angel. “God is looking for someone who sincerely wants this job and holds no hard feelings toward those who don’t.” He offered her peace and moved on.

He found another deeply devout 15-year-old girl. “Maybe Simone will be interested,” Gabriel mused. Simone considered the invitation seriously but was concerned how she would explain an out-of-wedlock pregnancy to, well, everyone. She was part of a faith community that was militant about purity. “I don’t think I’m right for the job,” Simone told Gabriel—who at this point was weary of rejection. Still, Simone always wanted to please God, so she had to ask, “Will God be terribly upset at my rejection?” Gabriel softly replied, “No, God won’t be upset. I’ll be sad, but this invitation is freely given, and God wants it to be freely accepted. You’re still beloved in God’s eyes, and we’ll find another job for you.”

Gabriel didn’t want to visit Raquel because he knew she was “spiritual but not religious,” and he felt another rejection coming on. But he always delivered God’s messages. 16-year-old Raquel peppered the angel with about a hundred excellent and important questions. By this time Gabriel was so tired he needed a couch to lay on. “Do you or do you not want to accept this invitation?” he asked. Raquel shook her head and RSVP’d. “Please let God know I appreciate being selected but this thing God wants is simply too great a job for me. I love God. I just don’t know God well enough to take this step at this time.” Gabriel gathered his things and stood from the couch. He offered her peace and assured her that saying NO was the right thing for her to do.

Gabriel was just about to confront God about the difficulty of this task he’d been given, but since he liked to be seen as a go-getter angel who delivered results, he plowed ahead to visit young Clara. Maybe she would be the one. After explaining everything he was allowed to explain, Gabriel asked, “Well…? What do you think?” Clara needed a lot of time to think about this. “Can you come back in a year or two?” she asked. “I’d love to, but this is a rather time-sensitive assignment,” he said as he rubbed his forehead in frustration. She noticed his distress. “Oh no, is God going to be mad at me for wanting more time?” she asked.

Why is everyone asking me this? he wondered. Don’t they know God is love and only wants to procreate with someone who enthusiastically consents?

Gabriel sat on a big, flat rock outside Clara’s house and asked for an audience with God. “This is not going our way,” he told his Boss. God laughed. “You’ve never dated, so you don’t know how it goes. Sometimes a person has to fall in love and be rejected a number of times before they find the lover willing to commit. Doesn’t make the ones who say NO bad people. It can be a numbers game, really.”

“Ok,” said Gabriel. “I’ll go visit Mary in Nazareth. But I’m not making any promises.” Again, God laughed. “If you don’t want this job, you don’t have to do it. I’m not into forcing people—you know that. Raphael might be willing to take over.”

“He’s good at healing but I’m not sure he has the gift of gab,” said Gabriel. “It’s not that I don’t want the job. I just want to succeed at the job!”

God reminded Gabriel that he was not asking him to be successful, but only to be faithful. (He took that line from Mother Teresa since for God time runs past, present and future all at the same time.)

“OK, Mary it is,” said Gabriel.

And you know the rest of the story. Mary said YES.

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About Teresa Blythe

Teresa Blythe is a full-time spiritual director and ordained UCC minister living and working in Phoenix, AZ. She is founder of the Phoenix Center for Spiritual Direction and served as the Director of the Hesychia School of Spiritual Direction in Tucson for over 14 years. She now trains spiritual directors in the Apprentice Training Program, which she created. Contact her at [email protected]. You can read more about the author here.

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