Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

The Not So Excellent Wife

Home
Family, Parenting and Religion
3 Powerfully Simple Ways to Make Your Marriage Happier

3 Powerfully Simple Ways to Make Your Marriage Happier

Last updated on: December 20, 2019 at 12:51 pm by Sheila Qualls

3 Powerfully Simple Ways to Make Your Marriage Happier 2019-12-20T12:51:08-06:00 Sheila Qualls

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

how to make your marriage happier Did you go into marriage thinking it’d be your happy place?

I did. And when it wasn’t, I blamed my husband.

He was supposed to be my personal happy machine.

He didn’t see it that way. And since he wasn’t making me happy, I started making him miserable.

I’d nag and complain because he seemed more interested in anything other than me. I longed for a happy, emotionally intimate relationship.

We weren’t ever going to have one at the rate I was going.

What can you do to make your marriage happier?

In truth, my criticism and complaining were dragging our marriage down. And they didn’t move me one step closer to the loving, compassionate, emotionally intimate marriage I wanted.

Fortunately, I found three happy marriage tips that helped me get the connection I want.

1. Let him know he can make you happy.

If your husband feels like all you do is complain, he’ll think he can’t make you happy and he’ll stop trying. Let him know when you’re pleased. Tell him what you like. When he knows what you like, he’ll do more of it. He sees your complaints as criticism of him. Let him know you appreciate what he does. If he makes the bed, thank him instead of re-making it. Act like you’re happy to see him. Tell him you’re glad he’s home or you missed him. Find another outlet for your complaints. Focus on telling him what you like. Ask yourself, “Would I want to come home to me?” When you feel good about him, he feels good about himself. Instead of complaining let him know what you want. When he knows what you want, he may try to get it for you.

2. Smile at him.

The simple act of smiling can transform you and those around you. When you smile, your face sends a message to your brain that you’re happy. And smiling makes you look better. You appear approachable. Would you want to approach someone who always has a sour face? When my husband walks in the door and I smile at him, he automatically smiles back. When I’m happy, he’s happy. If you want to be happy, act happy. People like to be around happy people.

3. Say thank you.

Seems simple, but it works. One way to be thankful is to let your husband know you appreciate him. Thank him for what he does, even if it’s something he’s supposed to do. If he picks up the kids from school, thank him. If he takes out the trash, thank him. Look for reasons to thank him. When he feels appreciated, he feels respected. When he feels respected, he’s going to want to make you happy. A grateful wife is a happy wife. Make a list of things you’re thankful for in your marriage and in life in general. Start focusing on those things and expressing thanks for them.

Need skills to build intimacy?

Get on the waitlist for my next group coaching session–Change Your Mind; Change Your Marriage.
Visit my website, like my Facebook page and join my private Facebook group.
Check out my FREE resources and download “How to Be A Wife No Man Will Ever Want to Leave” Challenge!
Apply for private coaching with Sheila.

Subscribe to updates from The Not So Excellent Wife here!

Also known as the Not So Excellent Wife, Sheila Qualls understands how tiring a tough marriage can be.

She went from the brink of divorce to having a thriving marriage by translating timeless truths into practical skills. She’s helped women just like you turn their men into the husbands they want.

After 33 years of marriage, she’s a coach and a speaker whose passion is to equip women to break relationship-stifling habits and do marriage God’s way. And you don’t have to be a doormat to do it.

She and her husband Kendall live in Minnesota with their five children and their Black Lab, Largo.

In addition to coaching, Sheila is a member of the MOPS Speaker Network. Her work has been featured on the MOPS Blog, The Upper Room, Grown and Flown, Scary Mommy, Beliefnet, Candidly Christian, Crosswalk.com, The Mighty and on various other sites on the Internet.

Marriage

christian encouragement

Christian living

happy wives

how to make your marriage happier

women's emotional health

Previous Post

October 4, 2019

4 Benefits of Marrying Young

Next Post

October 8, 2019 4 Words No Husband Wants to Hear

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Emotional Health Faith Health Marriage Motherhood Parenting Uncategorized

Select a Month September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 January 2023 June 2022 March 2022 June 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 July 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 February 2017

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz