Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
Jewish
I was not at Sinai

I was not at Sinai

Last updated on: September 10, 2018 at 6:17 pm by Hebrew College

I was not at Sinai 2018-09-10T18:17:17-04:00 Hebrew College

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Parashat Nitzavim (Deuteronomy 29:9-30:20)

By Rabbi Elisha Herb

Rabbi Elisha Herb The people stand at Sinai as would-be converts to the Torah covenant, long since created in the mystical realms but yet to be received by the people Israel.

The Torah tells us, it is “…not only with you that I make this covenant and this oath, but with [1] those who are standing here with us this day before the LORD our God and [2]those who are not with us here this day” (Deut. 29:13-14).

The Talmud, Shevuot 39a, famously explains that those who are not with us here this day applies to all subsequent generations of those born Jewish and all converts in the future.

From this mystical perspective, all of the souls of all Jews, including would-be converts, have the Torah inscribed upon them; the covenant is hardwired into us. Parashat Nitzavim hints at this inherent relationship; the Torah, we read, is “very close to you, in your mouth and in your heart, to observe it” (Deut. 30:14).

Often, this midrash from Shevuot is invoked to be inclusive of converts. Once while visiting the shul of Rabbi Michel Twerski in Milwaukee, we were hosted by a pious young couple from Jerusalem. When they heard of my journey, the wife reminded me that the souls of converts, too, stood at Sinai. Her intent was clear: to make me feel encouraged, supported and – at least on a spiritual level – equalto her. That our souls were standing together at Sinai meant that her soul and mine were bound together, made of the same spiritual stuff. I received the intended kindness.

And this teaching does not sit well with me.

Beyond the implications of (a) the ethnicity of souls and (b) determinism that this tradition carries, there is something else.

That some souls are predestined to connect to Torah – which I understand in the most expansive sense – misses what it means to choose Judaism. In another famous Talmudic passage, one sage teaches that God held the mountain above the people and said to them, “If you accept the Torah, excellent. If not, here you will be buried.” To this midrash, Rav Akha bar Yaakov responds, “From this teaching there is a substantial caveat to the obligation to fulfill the Torah” (Shabbat 88a). Rashi explains that Rav Akha is pointing out the lack of freedom-of-choice in this scenario. “If Israel is called to judgment as to why they do not fulfil what they have accepted upon themselves, they are able to respond ‘But our acceptance was coerced [and therefore null].’” (Rashi, ad loc.)

All of the souls of all Jews past and present, and the souls of all converts, are thus born with the mountain hanging over their heads.

This situation calls to mind the poem Heritage by Chaim Gouri: after surviving the trauma of his father nearly slaughtering him as a sacrifice at God’s command (Genesis 22), Isaac leaves a timeless legacy to his descendants:

But he bequeathed that hour to his offspring.
They are born
And with a knife in their hearts.

Those born hardwired with the Torah in their souls have only the choice between “life and good, death and evil.” (Deut. 30:15) The life and good if they choose Torah; the death and evil if they don’t.

This is why I say I was not at Sinai.

I was not born with the mountain hanging over my head; nor was I born with a knife in my heart. These are not choices; these are inheritances. I chose this path because of my Jewish teachers, because of Jewish spiritual practices, because of Judaism’s intellectual maturity, because of the spiritual language of this tradition, and because of Jewish community.

I chose being Jewish because in it I did indeed see “life and good, death and evil.” But in the choosing there was no coercion whatsoever. Quite the opposite. This means that the choice between life and good, death and evil is a free choice, made based on the merits of Judaism and Jewish people. If there is anything I believe I have to offer as a ger that is unique, it is a Judaism that is not born with a mountain suspended over its head, without a knife in its heart; that this soul was “born” into Judaism having been drawn in by its wisdom, its saints and mystics, and its teachers.

Rabbi Elisha Herb serves the community of Temple Beth Sholom in Salem, Oregon. A 2016 graduate of the Rabbinical School of Hebrew College, he is also a wilderness river guide for the Four Corners School of Outdoor Education in Monticello, Utah.

Learn more about Hebrew College’s rabbinical and cantorial programs on November 12, 2018 at Ta Sh’ma (Come & hear), our Fall Open House & Day of Learning for prospective rabbinical, rav-hazzan and cantorial students.

Seventy Faces of Torah

shabbat

Torah

Previous Post

August 21, 2018

The Torah needs a Trigger Warning

Next Post

September 12, 2018 Hypocrisy, Boundaries, and the Mitzvah of Part-time Piety

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Uncategorized

Select a Month April 2026 March 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz