Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

To Give a Defense

Home
Catholic
A Poem for My Stillborn Daughter, Caitlyn

A Poem for My Stillborn Daughter, Caitlyn

Last updated on: March 6, 2018 at 10:40 pm by Scott Eric Alt

A Poem for My Stillborn Daughter, Caitlyn 2018-03-06T22:40:58-04:00 Scott Eric Alt

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Photo by the author

Eleven years ago today, my daughter was stillborn. That day, in the hospital, a nurse who provided grief support to parents who’d experienced perinatal loss visited with me. (Kim, who had eclampsia and had had a seizure the prior morning, was still spending a large part of the day asleep and half-aware of what was going on.) During the conversation, the nurse suggested to me that I write something for my daughter and have it buried with her, in order to mitigate a sense I had that I wouldn’t be able to do for Caitlyn, or say to Caitlyn, all that I wanted to.

That was on April 18, 2006—the Tuesday after Easter.

The next day, April 19, I wrote these words. I have never published them until now. I had them buried with her on April 24, 2006—the day after Divine Mercy Sunday.

To a Daughter Going Home
for Caitlyn Elisabeth Alt

When first I heard, my mouth fell,
Awed that I had made a child
Who’d grow into a thing of joy on joy.
I remember that I cried.

As month passed month, I clung unto the souvenirs
Of things that told me that you were:
The heart I heard record your life,
The many times I felt you kick.

Your mom gave all she had for you,
To bring you out and hear you breathe.
Your one room here was in her womb:
A room alone, designed by God,

Who held you there when you lost life,
So He could resurrect you at your birth
And bring you unto your new home
To wait there for your mom and dad.

A little while we held you here within our arms
To assure you that our love is great.
And though we know you skipped the hurt of Earth,
How beautiful your face that could not see.

My baby girl, I’ll never see you learn to walk
Or miss and worry when you go to school.
I’ll never hear you laugh or cry
Or comfort and uphold you when you hurt.

I’ll never walk you down the aisle
To give you to the man you love.
I’ll only lift you up on high
And give you to your King.

Dear little Caitlyn, little tiny thing, so good,
I cannot imagine all the joy that’s yours,/>While we here hurt and miss and cry./>And every day I have I’ll look for you.

So take with you some words of love
For your new room, prepared for you by Christ,
Who loved you first and best
And gave you shortly unto us.

How beautiful that time! more beautiful your home!
We’ll see you there when Christ does call,
And never leave, and know your face,
And give you all the love we’ve held for you.

Love,
Daddy

***

Do not let your heart be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, that where I am, there you may be too. (John 14:1-3).

Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them. For the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these. (Mark 10:14)

***

Personal Narrative

Caitlyn Elisabeth Alt

Death of a Child

Fathers and Daughters

Previous Post

April 12, 2017

Sean Spicer Is Right: German Jews Weren't German Citizens

Next Post

April 24, 2017 The Incoherence of "Just Clarify Amoris! Answer the Dubia!"

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Abortion About Me Answers for Calvinists Answers to Media Fictions Answers to Objections Anti-Catholicism Apologetics Apostolic Succession Atonement Authority of the Church Baptism Benedictines Biblical Exegesis Blogging Book Reviews Books & Writing &c. Calvin's Institutes Capital Punishment Catholic Church Chastity Christology Church Fathers Church Social Doctrine Confession Contraception Conversion Stories Crusades Debates Depression & Suicide Deuterocanon Development of Doctrine Ecumenism English Language Eucharistic Adoration Exorcism Extra Ecclesiam Fisks & Rebuttals Freedom of Religion Freedom of Speech Fundamentalism Gender Politics Gender Theory Good Works Homosexuality Humor Idolatry Immaculate Conception In the News Inquisition ISIS Islam Just for Fun Just War Justification LCWR Limbo Liturgical Abuse Liturgical Year Magisterium Marriage and Family Mary Mortal Sin New Evangelization NFP Papacy Papal Documents Papal Infallibility Personal Narrative Politics Pope Francis Pope Francis Derangement Syndrome Population Control Praying to the "Dead" Priesthood Primacy of Peter Protestant Denominations Purgatory Radical Islam Radical Traditionalists Real Presence Right to Conscience RIght to Life Saints Same-Sex "Marriage" Seven Quick Takes Social Justice Social Media Sola Scriptura Spirit of Vatican II SSPX The Eucharist The Mass The Resurrection Traditionalism Vatican II Year of Mercy

Select a Month August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 November 2018 October 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 April 2018 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 May 2013 April 2013 February 2013 January 2013

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Who was the giant defeated by David?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Goliath Pharaoh Samson Herod