CLOSE THE DOOR! YOU’RE LETTING THE FLIES IN!

Last updated on: August 22, 2014 at 3:56 pm by Rebecca Frech

CLOSE THE DOOR! YOU’RE LETTING THE FLIES IN! 2014-08-22T15:56:19-05:00 Rebecca Frech

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Summertime in Oklahoma would be more honestly known as “Fly Season”. They’re everywhere. Every house looks like the set of the Amityville horror with the swarms on the windows. We killed 32 this morning. 32! and this is a regular day. We’ll probably massacre 20 or more this afternoon before the Computer Guy gets home.

I hate flies. They’re nasty. They eat poop and throw up on stuff, and my husband has OCD….do you have any idea what it is like to live with an OCD person during fly season? I don’t believe you can even imagine it. I see-saw between being annoyed and amused like a schizophrenic who’s off her meds. (Darn it…I missed a doctor’s appt. this morning. I’m losing it here people.)

The kitchen door is always open. Always. I scream at people to close it. I beg. I bribe. I yell obscenities in the hopes that the shock will make them finally listen. Who keeps leaving the blasted door open?! &^%$#@*^!!!!!!

The dog. The dog has learned to open the door and let herself outside. She never listens to me any more than the children do, so she leaves it open in case she needs back inside. Air condition the outside? Yes, please! The dog!!!! I never knew she was this smart.

I’ve been grounding children all week for letting her outside when the garage was open and letting her run the neighborhood. They haven’t. I watched her yesterday. She hears the garage door open and lets herself out just as nicely as you please. She goes on a jaunt down the street, sniffs a few behinds, and then meanders her way home again.

I don’t need this. I already have 5 children conspiring against me to drive me insane, lock me in an institution and steal the house. Now I find out that the dog is in on it too.

She’s always been a little odd, but what can you expect from a boxer/beagle mix that was abandoned by her mother and nursed by a cat? She’s going to be off a bit mentally….don’t you think? We used to think she was cute but dumb…now we know that she was just lulling us into a false sense of security so that she would be poised to take over…..

Here’s a picture of Grace, our criminal mastermind:

Uncategorized

Previous Post

July 16, 2008

Another Brilliant Jib Jab Cartoon

Next Post

July 22, 2008 Can you possibly want more children?

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Uncategorized

Select a Month May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Who brought to Jesus the woman taken in adultery?

Select your answer to see how you score.

The Apostles The Disciples The Publicans The Pharisees