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Here’s the Thing about Trump Ordering Troops into DC

Here’s the Thing about Trump Ordering Troops into DC

Last updated on: August 11, 2025 at 1:09 pm by Rebecca Hamilton

Here’s the Thing about Trump Ordering Troops into DC 2025-08-11T13:09:35-06:00 Rebecca Hamilton

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Jeffrey Epstein, Source: Wikimedia Commons, public domain.

The thing about Trump ordering troops into Washington DC for no reason and threatening to do the same to Oakland, Chicago and Baltimore, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump trundling off to Alaska for a confab with Putin, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump calling President Obama a traitor and ordering his puppet Attorney General to convene a Grand Jury to “investigate,” is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump using DOGE to dig through our private records to find things, no matter how insignificant, that he can direct his puppet “justice” department to “investigate” them for, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump threatening to take away Rosie O’Donnell’s citizenship, is he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump using threats of taking away their broadcast license to force news networks to stop reporting his crimes and stupidity, is he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump standing on the White House roof like the Pillsbury Dough Boy, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump sending the FBI to chase down Texas democratic legislators so he can steal the 2026 election is that evidently, the FBI still hasn’t found the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump saying Taylor Swift is “no longer hot,” is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump turning Jackie Kennedy’s Rose Garden (that belongs to us) into a parking lot, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump redecorating the White House to look like a Victorian whorehouse, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump deciding to build a huge ballroom onto the White House (that belongs to us) without even asking Congress for the money, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump demanding billions of dollars in payoffs from other countries to stop him from illegally (Congress is supposed to have oversight) imposing sky-high tariffs on them, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump planning to keep for his very own private thingy the big beautiful jet that Qatar gifted to him; the one that he is using for Air Force One because Air Force One wasn’t luxurious enough for him; the thing about that is he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about rural hospitals closing because of budget cuts so billionaires could get a big, beautiful tax cut, is he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about Trump building ICE into a private police force that is showing signs of becoming a combined Gestapo and Einsatzgruppen, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing about the rising prices on things you and I buy, is that he still hasn’t released the Epstein Files.

The thing … the real thing … is that if, say, just for pretend, you were president, and lots of people were beginning to think you must be a pedophile who raped little girls alongside your pal Jeff, wouldn’t you release the Epstein Files; protect the victim’s identities, but otherwise print every word, show every video, let everyone, everywhere see that you weren’t in the files and had nothing to do with this evil?

Unless, of course, (just spit balling here, I don’t know anything) you were in the files.

Note: The paragraph at the end of this post, which begins “The thing … the real thing … is that if, say, just for pretend” is a play on a meme I saw many times on the internet. It is not original with me.

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