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Christian Persecution: Are Atheists Vampires?

Christian Persecution: Are Atheists Vampires?

Last updated on: February 9, 2017 at 12:04 am by Rebecca Hamilton

Christian Persecution: Are Atheists Vampires? 2017-02-09T00:04:15-07:00 Rebecca Hamilton

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I haven’t written about the recent flap over the 9/11 Cross. I’m not going to say much now. I just want to share a theory I have that might clear up a small mystery.

For those who don’t know, the 9/11 Cross is a cross that formed by two pieces of rubble falling together amidst the collapse of the Twin Towers in New York on September 11, 2001.

The 9/11 Cross has great meaning for many people, and so far as I can see, harms none of those who do not find it meaningful. However, the American Atheist Foundation disagrees. They filed suit against use of the 9/11 Cross, which was dedicated to the World Trade Center Memorial.

According to a September 11 article in Charisma News, their claims of the “damages” they have suffered because of the 9/11 Cross include,

David Silverman, president of American Atheists, contends that atheists are experiencing horrible physical reactions after seeing the rubble cross, such as “inter alia, dyspepsia, symptoms of depression, headaches, anxiety, and mental pain and anguish.”

The atheists claim that the cross makes them “feel officially excluded from the ranks of citizens who were directly injured by the 9/11 attack.” (Read more here.)

As they used to say on the old Laugh-In show, “let that percolate through your being.”

These folks are seriously taking the position in a court document that the mere sight of a cross causes them to experience, among other things, “dyspepsia, symptoms of depression, headaches, anxiety and mental pain and anguish.”

Atheists aren’t very hardy people are they? It makes one wonder how such delicate little flowers managed to survive millions of years of natural selection. One would think that they’d have just dyspepsiad away some night after witnessing an unshielded baptism.

I’ve thought about this. Not a lot. But I have thought about it. I can only come up with two possible conclusions.

1. Atheist organizations are set on harassing, insulting and attacking Christians at every turn in an attempt to drive us underground and silence us.

or ….

2. Atheists are vampires. I mean, who else reacts like that to the sight of a cross?

These not-so-well-thought-out conclusions, if followed to their own conclusions, lead us inevitably to two possible plans of action.

1. We can fight back. Maybe sue them for harassment or wanton stupidity or something.

or ….

2. We can try putting a couple of them in front of mirrors. See if they have a reflection. If they don’t, well, we’ve all watched enough vampire movies to know what comes next.

Whichever way we go on this, I think it’s important to never invite an atheist into our homes. You know what happens when you invite a vampire in, don’t you?

Anyway, I guess that’s all for now. Remember: Next time you see an atheist, whip that mirror out. And keep your garlic, backup holy water and crucifix handy. Even if they don’t turn to ash or anything, the crucifix alone is documented to produce crippling dyspepsia.

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