Monday Morning Confessional – The conspicuous consumer-exhibitionist

Last updated on: March 12, 2012 at 6:23 am by Tim Suttle

Monday Morning Confessional – The conspicuous consumer-exhibitionist 2012-03-12T06:23:00-06:00 Tim Suttle

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I confess that the last time I was on an airplane I seriously struggled with my own non-violence. The woman next to me carried on some sort of salad reeking of garlic and blue cheese, and sat chewing and smacking her lips while having a loud phone conversation as though she was the only person on the planet. The person on the other end of the line was obviously trying to get off the phone because my obnoxious neighbor kept saying, “No, I’m fine, they haven’t shut the door yet.” I confess that the more I tried to let it go, the more uptight and angry I became.

I confess that I think there is a new (possibly not new), breed of person out there I’m calling the conspicuous consumer-exhibitionist. They talk loudly on their blue-tooth, gesticulating with their hands, while standing in lines in a public place (I’m at Panera right now watching one such blue-toother pace back and forth a speak forcefully… I’m sure the other callers are enjoying the sounds of him chomping his bagel). They eat a smelly entre while in confined quarters. They blast their music through their headphones so loudly you can sing along while standing next to them in a moving subway and still hear the music. They can’t sit alone for 2 minutes w/out whipping out the ipad. Everything the conspicuous consumer-exhibitionist does screams “look at me as I engage in the latest thing.” I confess that I attempt to conspicuously ignore them so as to refuse them the satisfaction.

I confess that last week I omitted one important fear from my top fears: man made things in water. They freak me out. A beach or lakefront – I’m totally fine with. A man made dam or especially some big cement and steel structure that goes down into the water gives me the shivers.

I confess that “springing forward” was especially painful this year. Losing an hour of sleep hurts, especially when you are not a morning person, but it is much worse when your Lenten fast is sleeping in. I further confess that although I hate rising early, I love being up before the sun comes up. So, unless I move to Nova Scotia or Maine, I’m doomed to either loathe the alarm clock or the sun.

I confess that I believe violence begets violence. I confess that I believe there is only one way it all stops: if the offended person forgoes vengeance. Violence stops when people refuse to kill other people even when killing is warranted. This is how people, and even nations, can prove that they have wisdom and understanding. You can’t kill murder; you can’t murder hate; you can’t war people into liking you. Please God; lead this country not into another war.

I made my confession – you make yours!

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