If It Were My Son

Last updated on: July 15, 2013 at 8:56 am by Peter Dybing

If It Were My Son 2013-07-15T08:56:00-06:00 Peter Dybing

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Deep inside of me there is the belief that if my child were to meet an untimely end at the hands of a stranger there would be justice. Police would investigate; prosecutors would involve me as the parent of the victim. My community would recognize the tragedy.

In my grief I would be comforted. Words of compassion would wash over me. The disbelief of everyone I know would remind me that in this nation we can seek justice, expect action, find closure.

But of course I AM WHITE.

If an individual who the police told to not follow him, gunned down my white son, there would be justice. Our culture would stand proclaiming that the individual who shot my son was responsible because he did not follow the lawful instructions of the police.

Anyone attempting to paint my son as having caused his own death by defending himself would be swiftly denounced as a victim blamer, unable to see the tragedy of this young blond haired and blue-eyed boy having lost his life.

But of course my son IS WHITE.

His mother would not be bombarded by images and opinions attempting to paint her lost child as a thug. When a photo is discovered of him flipping his middle finger, it would be dismissed as the normal actions of teenager expressing his defiance and crossing boundaries. Just a part of growing up

But of course his middle finger IS WHITE.

Those who say, “The verdict is in, lets move on” are ignoring the devastating consequences of this case on people of color in this nation. Mothers across this nation are in fear for the lives of their children. Boys are shot down, never to become men and families grieve without the expectation of justice or accountability.

Of course these sons are Black

This is nothing new, the lives of young African Americans have long been held as less valuable in our communities. There is no international attention when these boys loose their lives, no discussion of breaking the cycle of violence in the mainstream press. No national empathy for the grieving parents.

Of course these victims are BLACK

This is racism, yours mine and our entire cultures. No, it is not the racism of the KKK burning crosses in the 60’s. No, it is not the racism of our grandparents still using the “n” word. No, it is not the racism of job discrimination. This is the racism that belongs to every person who enjoys the benefits of not having to worry about our children being shot for who they are. In our belief that our children are safe, in our belief that such things happen to others, in our collective lack of action in response to the injustice recently perpetuated in a courtroom in Florida, we are responsible.

George Zimmerman is not the boogieman, he is us; an individual whose actions reflected unconscious beliefs and prejudices held by our culture, our families’ and our selves. We have an opportunity to confront our own privilege, to speak out, to stand in unity with our brothers and sisters of color and loudly proclaim enough, we will hold our community accountable for its unjust attitudes, we will confront the vestiges of racism instilled in us by our cultural experiences. We will work to transcend the mirage that is our legal system. We will seek compassion, openness, and self-awareness in all that we do.

A young Black man is dead; let his life be the call to action, the event that finally calls us to a real solution to the false and destructive lie that is equal protection under the law. Let us no longer tolerate this system that ignores the real racism in our society and ourselves.

All that is needed for the evil that is racism to prevail is for us to do nothing, to move on in our lives. Now is the time to spread this message far and wide, we will act, protest, join in the cause of real justice, call our system to account; shed the racism that encumbers real change!

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