Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

The Mormon Therapist

Home
Latter-day Saint
Health, Fitness and Religion
Forget Religious Freedom… We Need Rights Protected from Religious Patriarchy, Oppression and Shame

Forget Religious Freedom… We Need Rights Protected from Religious Patriarchy, Oppression and Shame

Last updated on: March 25, 2018 at 11:24 am by Natasha Helfer

Forget Religious Freedom… We Need Rights Protected from Religious Patriarchy, Oppression and Shame 2018-03-25T11:24:43-05:00 Natasha Helfer

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Over the last week, due to the leaked interview of Joseph L. Bishop, I have read hundreds of comments in regards to situations where the priorities of how we deal with sexuality in our church would be considered comical (twilight zonish) if not for it being so tragic and life altering for its members. I think I get used to hearing these stories after so many years… but I have to admit, my anger has been riled to high levels again this week.

I thought I would share this particular comment… because in light of how much time, money (many millions of dollars) and energy (“religious freedom” and “traditional marriage” have been the code words against LGBT+ members spoken at every general conference for as long as I can remember) our church has spent fighting the “gay agenda” (I literally heard this phrase in my own ward setting just in the last few weeks)… it’s just mind boggling to me how upside down our priorities have been.

Jim Summers was born and raised in the church and served a full-time mission in the Washington DC North Mission. After his mission he married in the temple and served in many callings, including Ward Mission Leader and Elders Quorum President. During all of this time he was trying to hide his true self not only from his family and the church, but from himself. He is now married to a wonderful man and together they own and operate a small interior design and event planning business.

Jim Summers photographed on the right with his husband.

When I “came out” and confessed to my wife and bishop that I was a gay man and had been unfaithful to her we lived in the Phoenix area. Just prior to coming out I had worked for the BSA and my assigned area included Chandler, AZ. It did not take long for the word to spread through the members of the church about my “outing”. This man (Joseph L. Bishop) lives in Chandler and was one of the multitudes of people who felt compelled to communicate their “disgust” with me to me directly. I spent countless hours crying and considering taking my own life because of him and many like him. I wish I could now return the favor.

I would also like to link to this excellent article written by Tresa Edmunds and MMHA member, Barbara Sensiba. It also does a great job of highlighting the irony we face as a church on the types of sexual shaming hypocrisy we have been doling out pretty much since we started… given the polygamous history we come from and the exploitation that took place, threatening women with their own exaltation and their family’s if they did not comply.

Guest Post: How Many Blips Are There? #MormonMeToo

It is going to take a very long time to take accountability and make amends. And the sad part, is that we really haven’t even started the work that needs to be done.

* And before everyone has a hissy fit with my title… I do believe in the importance of religious freedom… absolutely… I just think we’ve got plenty of it… and I’m much more concerned in regards to the rights that get trampled on in the name of religious freedom (and not just in our faith).

Natasha Helfer Parker, LCMFT, CST runs an online practice, Symmetry Solutions, which focuses on helping families and individuals with faith concerns, sexuality and mental health. She hosts the Mormon Mental Health and Mormon Sex Info Podcasts, writes a regular column for Sunstone Magazine, is the current president of the Mormon Mental Health Association and runs a sex education program, Sex Talk with Natasha. She has over 20 years of experience working with primarily an LDS/Mormon clientele.

Previous Post

March 20, 2018

Mormon Leaks and Systemic Issues with LDS Sexual Perpetrators in Leadership

Next Post

March 25, 2018 "Thanks, past me." The Importance of Self Care

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Abortion Abuse Addiction Adolescents Anger Anxiety BDSM Bipolar Disorder Body Image Boundaries Children Circumcision Civil Rights Consent COVID19-Coronavirus Death Depression Divorce Domestic Violence Emotional Abuse Erectile Dysfunction Faith Crisis/Faith Transition Gender Identity Gender Roles Gospel Teachings Grief Homosexuality Infidelity LGBTQ LGBTQ+ Male Issues Marriage Masturbation Menopause Mental Health Mindfulness Miscarriage Missions Mixed-Faith Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Parenting Perfectionism Physical Abuse Physical Health Pornography Premature Ejaculation PTSD Race Relations Relationships Rest Righteousness Self Care Self Injury Self-Esteem Sexual Abuse Sexual Disorders Sexual Education Sexuality Single Adults Social Media Spirituality Suicide Survey Temple Issues Transgender Health Trauma Uncategorized Violence Women's Issues Word of Wisdom

Select a Month September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 December 2018 November 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 March 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 July 2015 February 2015 January 2015 November 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 April 2014 February 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 May 2012 April 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Who was Samuel's mother, who prayed for a child at Shiloh?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Leah Hannah Peninnah Rebekah