Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

The Mormon Therapist

Home
Latter-day Saint
Health, Fitness and Religion
Why is no one addressing the issue of women watching pornography?

Why is no one addressing the issue of women watching pornography?

Last updated on: March 14, 2009 at 11:45 pm by Natasha Helfer

Why is no one addressing the issue of women watching pornography? 2009-03-14T23:45:00-05:00 Natasha Helfer

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

If it’s obvious that so many women (inside AND outside the church) are also having difficulties with sexual addiction and porn addiction, why is it never once addressed in General Conference or in the Women’s Broadcast or the Ensign? The only time porn is brought up is in the Priesthood session. I’m positive a lot of girls grow up not even realizing that some of what they’re engaging in is wrong because it’s never brought to the attention of women, particularly when they’re young girls and teenagers. The YW manuals never once mention any such problems; the only chastity lessons they get are how to keep boys at arm’s length. Why is no one addressing this issue? Why do women have to wait until they’re already addicted before anyone will help them not be addicted? Why is it that when women see their bishops they’re often treated as freaks of nature because “that’s a man problem, not a woman problem”? Why isn’t the church educating bishops and stake presidents about the possibilities of this being a large problem for women as well and how to help them like they help the males in their congregations?

First off, I have to make it very clear that I do not speak for the Church nor am I aware of what their official stance is on how they plan to address the issues surrounding the overwhelming and growing use of pornography. I agree with you that they are most definitely addressing this problem among the priesthood members. And, to their credit, it is a problem that affects more men than women. However, I also agree with you that it is not addressed among the sisters of our church. Here are some reasons that I believe might contribute to this:

It’s impossible for the Church to address every problem that arises for its members. I believe that they do their best to follow major trends and try to address these as they come up. There are so many different problems that surround the area of sexuality, I’m sure it’s difficult to address.
A major trend that has been a very real issue for the women of the Church of late is the rising frequency of clinical depression. I have noticed that the talks directed towards the sisters focus more on self-acceptance, not running faster than we have strength, self-esteem, etc. I’m sure that although the leaders recognize that there are inappropriate behaviors that women are engaging in, they would rather not add one more thing to the “guilt tank” LDS women are already dealing with.
I agree with you that in our culture in general (not just LDS) we tend to think of men as being more sexual than women. This is actually not the case at all. Our sexual templates (what turns us on) and drives may differ, but all human beings are sexual. I also agree that because of these perceptions, we tend to be surprised or excessively judgemental when we hear that a woman could be a sex addict or enjoys looking at pornography. Even women who have a higher libido than their husbands can be left feeling “weird” or inadequate. This is an area we need to become more comfortable addressing.

It’s important to remember that pornographic use does not automatically translate into pornographic addiction. Those who struggle with sex or pornographic addiction have a high likelihood of sexual trauma in their past. Remembering this can help us as members be more empathetic and understanding when these issues come up.

It is also important to be aware that some women who look at pornography do so because they feel pressured to so by their spouses as a way to liven up their sexual lives or legitimately enjoy seeing their spouses excited by the pornography. Therefore for these people, the use of pornography has more to do with the spouse than with their own desires. My findings have been that although this can create a sense of false intimacy at first, it is exactly that: false intimacy. And it then becomes a harder task to go back and recreate the true intimacy that couples want in their sexual relationships.

It is paramount for us as members to become educated about our sexual & cultural surroundings, relevant statistics, and negative trends so that we are better able to educate our children and react appropriately to friends and other members within our stakes and wards. We cannot always rely on the Church to do all of this for us.

Previous Post

March 13, 2009

FYI: Cyber Sex/Pornography with Teens & Youth

Next Post

March 16, 2009 What happens when one spouse has become a liberal mormon and the other still believes in the doctrine?

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Abortion Abuse Addiction Adolescents Anger Anxiety BDSM Bipolar Disorder Body Image Boundaries Children Circumcision Civil Rights Consent COVID19-Coronavirus Death Depression Divorce Domestic Violence Emotional Abuse Erectile Dysfunction Faith Crisis/Faith Transition Gender Identity Gender Roles Gospel Teachings Grief Homosexuality Infidelity LGBTQ LGBTQ+ Male Issues Marriage Masturbation Menopause Mental Health Mindfulness Miscarriage Missions Mixed-Faith Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Parenting Perfectionism Physical Abuse Physical Health Pornography Premature Ejaculation PTSD Race Relations Relationships Rest Righteousness Self Care Self Injury Self-Esteem Sexual Abuse Sexual Disorders Sexual Education Sexuality Single Adults Social Media Spirituality Suicide Survey Temple Issues Transgender Health Trauma Uncategorized Violence Women's Issues Word of Wisdom

Select a Month September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 December 2018 November 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 March 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 July 2015 February 2015 January 2015 November 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 April 2014 February 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 May 2012 April 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009

Follow Us!

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What did Moses' staff turn into as a sign for Pharaoh?

Select your answer to see how you score.

A dove A serpent A branch A frog

Related posts from The Mormon Therapist

Latter-day Saint

RECLAIM YOUR TRUE SELF

The Mormon Therapist

Latter-day Saint

Comments on Navigating Mixed Faith Marriages

The Mormon Therapist

Latter-day Saint

The Mormon Therapist

Latter-day Saint

A Letter to Mixed Faith Couples

The Mormon Therapist

TRENDING AT PATHEOS Latter-day Saint

Did Prayer Cure His Cancer? Or Was It...

At 4 AM one morning, Joshua W. Brown’s wife awoke to a...

8 Ways a Near-Death Experience Rewires the Soul

Does Consciousness Survive Physical Death? After 50 Years of Research, Dr. Raymond...

Holy Longing: What Our Restlessness Is Telling Us

“One can find so many pains when the rain is falling.” -John...

The Making of a Dumbass

What this is NOT about. This blog is definitely not about...

Who Told You That?

Who said the Israelites were God’s chosen? That’s right, they did. Who...

The Spirit World Is the Real World: God...

A Monk’s Wisdom on Body and Spirit I sit with Brother Martin...

view all Latter-day Saint blogs

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Copyright 2008-2026, Patheos. All rights reserved.

Subscription Support Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In

Follow Patheos