Learning To Wait Well – When Inner Calm Trumps Control

Last updated on: June 30, 2025 at 8:50 am by Michele Howe

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Learning To Wait Well – When Inner Calm Trumps Control 2025-06-30T08:50:08-05:00 Michele Howe

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Learning To Wait Well

Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.

Psalm 27: 14

“How do we get to the morning, to the sunshine, to the joy? There is only one way. By waiting for it.”

Ken Gire

I hate waiting. Like everyone else, I struggle against the ticking of the clock when I feel such a sense of urgency inside for something to change or for relief to come right this minute that I can scarcely breathe. By far, the longest “wait” I’ve ever experienced came the night my daughter was missing. I remember sitting in the dark kitchen at 1:00am staring out the window into more blackness and pleading with God to bring her home. Was I sure He would? Not really.

Waiting When A Life Is At Risk

At that period of her life, my daughter was partying and clubbing and putting herself into one dangerous situation (and relationship) after another. So smack in the middle of that tortuously sleepless night as I waited for her to call or to respond to my text message…for any sign of life from her, I wondered if I would make it through the night. Somehow God reached into my heart and gave me just enough strength to keep breathing (and praying) as I waited, but it was the longest, most painful “wait” I’ve ever endured. This in part because I was keenly aware that there was nothing I could do but wait. In those terrifyingly dark hours, I honestly didn’t know how God would answer my prayers. I didn’t know if I’d ever see my beautiful daughter again. One I did know one thing for certain…that God waited with me.

God Waits With Us

What have you waited for? All of us have had experiences of desperate waiting, haven’t we? We can all recall a few (or more) heart pounding, pulse-racing moments when God seemed absent but was really there right with us. Every one of us has experienced those times when we really believed we couldn’t wait another moment for help or relief from a tragedy too large for us to handle. But what about those times when we’re called to wait on the not so urgent? Those countless daily opportunities when it’s not a life or death situation…it’s purely “uncomfortable” and we simply don’t like it?

We’re a sorry bunch of “waiters” aren’t we? Our entire nation wants, no, demands that needs be met immediately. Whether the coveted object(ive) is small or large, matters not. Americans young and old are continually being fed the fabrication that if we desire something, it is within our power and rights to immediately obtain it. No delay required.

Everyone Is Waiting For Something

Real life begs to disagree. And disagree it does. Consider all that you’ve waited for in your own life. We wait to get better after feeling ill. We wait for someone to reply to an urgent request. We wait for doctors, dentists, hair stylists, spouses, children. We wait in lines. We wait for our turn. We wait to be heard. We wait to be found or found out. We wait for a better job. We wait to receive an education. We wait for repair technicians, for parts, for labor, for bills. We wait to hear the weather. We wait for the sports news, evening news, bad news, and good news, any news at all. Let’s face it, for a huge portion of our lives we must wait.

Since in large measure, waiting is life and life is waiting; why not learn to wait the best way we can? Let’s switch around former assumptions and learn to view wait time as the opportune time to: develop quietness, listen better, see more clearly, contemplate tough decisions, reflect and be thankful. We can do this. We can. If we choose to use all that anxiety-ridden energy and channel it into a different direction, our waiting will be transformed.

Waiting Can Change Us For The Better

We’ll be changed and as we accept waiting as a necessary ally rather than a mortal adversary, everything about “us” will alter too. There will suddenly be more time for what’s important, for appreciating the subtle beauty of daily life, and for resting contentedly wherever we find ourselves. We can take comfort that time is fluid, moving, and never stagnant. No matter how long the wait, or how painful, it won’t last forever. History proves this. It should also convince us that there are moments and spaces of time when it is only after we traverse through the waiting stage that genuine hope arrives on the scene.

Waiting Well Is A Lifelong Skill

Author Ken Gire writes, “We can’t hurry the dawn, no matter how anxiously we pace the floor or how impatiently we watch the clock. And so the question is not do we wait or not wait, because waiting is all we can do. The question is; how will we wait? Will we wait well…or will we wait poorly?”

General Christian

Family, Parenting and Religion

About Michele Howe

Michele Howe is the author of 30 books for women, children, and families. She has published over 3000 articles, reviews, and curriculum. Read more about waiting well by reading Michele's book, Finding Freedom and Joy in Self-Forgetfulness. You can read more about the author here.

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