Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Micha Boyett

Home
Family, Parenting and Religion
Because I love Jesus so much…

Because I love Jesus so much…

Last updated on: December 15, 2011 at 6:00 am by michaboyett

Because I love Jesus so much… 2011-12-15T06:00:14-07:00 michaboyett

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

We’re talking about Christmas songs at the lunch table. I say, “My favorite song is ‘Silent Night’. I like to sing it when it’s Christmas Eve and the church is dark except for all the candles glowing in every person’s hands.”

“I don’t like that song.” My three-year-old says.

“But it’s really beautiful.”

“Hmmmm.” He takes bite of cheese quesadilla. This is the start of the days his 13-year-old self will use that word to answer every question I ask.

I’m feeling talkative, like I need to prove something.

“Sometimes,” I say, “when I sing that song, I think about Jesus being born and his mama holding him and the angels singing and the donkeys scooting around the barn and then I cry. I cry because I love Jesus so much and I’m so glad he came to rescue us.”

August looks up at me, confused. Great, I’ve confused him by saying I cry about Jesus. He’s going to think Jesus makes me sad.

After lunch when I’m leaning over his bed, whispering a story then tucking him snug as a bug in a rug, he gets that look on his face and moves his head like a tiny professor, shifting his eyes to the corner because he feels that what he’s saying is very important.

“Mommy, sometimes I cry because I love Jesus so much,” he says.

“Honey, you can love Jesus without having to cry,” I say, trying to correct my careless confusion. “You know me, I just cry about everything.”

“No,” he says. “Sometimes I just sing and sing and cry because I love Jesus.”

“Well, I’m really glad you love Jesus,” I say.

Then I blow him a big bubblegum kiss that invisibly pops onto my face. I roll it up in my hands and stick it on his face, blankets snuggled up to his chin.

Later that week, after Chris tucks him in, he comes into the living room. “You won’t believe what August said tonight,” he says, laughing. He said, “Sometimes I cry when I sing about Christmas because I love Jesus so much.”

I laugh and bury my face in my hands. “I’m the worst,” I say. “Is that good or bad?”

Chris isn’t worried. (He’s never worried. That’s my job.) But I wonder: What will he remember about growing up in our home? What will stick in him about our faith? What will I have said that breaks him later? What image of Jesus have I projected to my boy?

Then, it’s Sunday. I stand beside my husband, my boys down the hall in their Sunday School classrooms, and I sing “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel.”

There in that room, this Advent Sunday is bright with the sunshine of morning, the world is awaiting a Savior who is coming to “Disperse the gloomy clouds of night, / And death’s dark shadows put to flight.”

The author, that 12th century brother or sister in the faith, bids me Rejoice. And sometimes I cry because I love Jesus so much and I’m so glad he came to rescue us.

Linking up with Heather at the Extraordinary Ordinary in an attempt to “Just Write“…

Previous Post

December 14, 2011

{Practicing Benedict} When it is best not to speak

Next Post

December 16, 2011 Darkness

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category A Deeper Church Beautiful Beautiful and Broken Books Broken Deeper Story Family and the Christian Year Family Life Found Friends Guest Post Invitation Motherhood My Chalkboard One Good Phrase Pinterest Place and Stability Poetry Practicing Benedict Thankful Tuesday The Daily The Mama Monk the Praying Life The Pursuit of Enough This Sacred Everyday Uncategorized Vlog Women and the Church World Vision

Select a Month March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Who was the Roman governor that sentenced Jesus to be crucified?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Felix Pontius Pilate Herod Caesar Augustus