Post Mom’s Group Confession

Last updated on: February 24, 2010 at 3:39 pm by michaboyett

Post Mom’s Group Confession 2010-02-24T15:39:05-07:00 michaboyett

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

I’m usually annoyed by people who confess their “sin of pride.” I know that’s a terrible thing to say, but I have rarely encountered what I felt was an earnest confession from someone dealing with pride. Maybe it’s because I’ve been around angst-ridden college students for the past decade in a lot of large group Bible studies. So it seems to me that pride is the sin you admit to “struggling with” when you have to share your sins with a group. Here’s why:

You sound like you’re doing so well at morality. When people hear that your current struggle is “pride,” they immediately believe that you’ve got the sex thing under control, that the alcohol/party thing is no issue, that greed has nothing on you. Yep, it’s just pride in your heart. That means you’re one step away from holiness!
It’s so emo. You can tear yourself apart for thoughts you have! You can let people know there’s sin in you that they can’t see! You’re so deep.
It’s an easy sin to admit to and not have to deal with.

Why do I feel this way about pride confessors? Because I am one. Or I was one before vowing that I wouldn’t be one anymore. Then of course I became prideful about how I am always annoyed by confessions of pride.

So confusing.

What I’m trying to say is this: Pride is a monster who lives in my brain. He takes over all my most genuine moments and tells me I’m the coolest person in the room. And because the monster lives in me, I can never really talk about him with complete purity. No matter what, there are always motives underneath my most meaningful confessions. I do want you to think I’m deep. I do want you to think he’s the only monster, when in fact, he’s just the one who shows up most often.

This morning in Mom’s Group when a woman brought up Lent and asked us about our current Lenten practices and I jumped in like I own the whole “contemplative” world and yakked about the Examination of Conscience and how I love the liturgical calendar, I wish I had spoken of those things in sincerity, with kindness, without showing how vain I am–even when it comes to prayer. I didn’t. There’s a fine line between genuine excitement over an idea and egotism. It feels like I walk in an out of that line all day long.

So, driving home from Mom’s Group with August in the back seat, in between singing his favorite song (with the motions) in my usual Wednesday attempt to keep him from falling asleep in the car before lunch, I had that sudden moment of clarity, that feeling of yuck. I saw myself as I really am. I saw the monster winning.

Friends, I think this blog is going to be a really great thing. But I’m just putting this out there: I’m vain. And if you read it and hear the monster yakking, I hope you’ll give me grace.

Previous Post

February 23, 2010

Thank you, Elizabeth Bishop.

Next Post

February 25, 2010 Vigils

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category A Deeper Church Beautiful Beautiful and Broken Books Broken Deeper Story Family and the Christian Year Family Life Found Friends Guest Post Invitation Motherhood My Chalkboard One Good Phrase Pinterest Place and Stability Poetry Practicing Benedict Thankful Tuesday The Daily The Mama Monk the Praying Life The Pursuit of Enough This Sacred Everyday Uncategorized Vlog Women and the Church World Vision

Select a Month March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

In Revelation, what does the rider on the white horse have coming out of his mouth?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Fire Words of judgment The word of God A sharp sword