A Simple “Thank You” That Makes a Big Difference

Last updated on: November 22, 2018 at 11:24 am by Mark D. Roberts

A Simple “Thank You” That Makes a Big Difference 2018-11-22T11:24:37-06:00 Mark D. Roberts

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

A few years ago I learned something that has changed my life. Maybe it has changed the lives of others too, at least a bit. What I learned was a simple kind of “thank you” that turns out to make a big difference.

Howard E. Butt, Jr. and yours truly in 2007, shortly after I began at Laity Lodge.

I learned about this simple “thank you” from Howard E. Butt, Jr. when he was president of the H.E. Butt Foundation, where I worked for seven years. During that stretch of time, I regularly met with Howard in a variety of settings, including his home, restaurants, and Laity Lodge. If we were at a restaurant, Howard would do something that I had rarely done in the past. At the end of the meal, Howard would quite intentionally find our waiter, look him or her right in the face, and thank him or her, usually mentioning specific things that the waiter had done. Howard always expressed some version of, “Thank you for your work.” That’s it. Like I said, it’s a simple “thank you.”

Over the years, I watched the response from those whom Howard thanked. A few seemed embarrassed or uninterested. But the vast majority of those Howard thanked were obviously moved. It mattered to them that Howard had paid attention to them and their work. And they were touched by his expression of gratitude. Occasionally, the person being thanked would have tears in his or her eyes. I got the feeling that this person didn’t receive thanks like this very often.

In the last several years, I have learned to imitate Howard’s exercise of simple thanksgiving. Now, at first, this was not easy for me because I am by nature not someone who speaks to strangers. But as I stretched myself in order to thank people who served me, I soon discovered the reward of seeing people feel appreciated and valued. Yes, I do this as a way of affirming others and their work. But, frankly, I think I get as much joy from this practice as those who receive my thanks.

I’m sure many of my readers already do this. You may even think it strange that I’m talking about this as if it’s something unusual. But, I believe that many of us have not developed the habit of expressing simple gratitude. We haven’t had this modeled for us by someone like Howard Butt. Doing so will make a big difference to those you appreciate. And it will make a big difference in your life as well. Beyond that, who knows? But wouldn’t it be great to live in a world where people felt regularly seen and valued for their work?

Thanksgiving

Previous Post

November 20, 2018

Grace Will Find You Out

Next Post

November 26, 2018 How to Make Your Job So Much More Than Just a Job

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Advent Advent Calendar Alissa Wilkinson Archeology Art and Faith Ash Wednesday Bible Books Business Business and Faith Christian Year (Liturgical or Church Year) Christmas Christmas according to Dickens Christmas, Culture, and Christ Christmas: Keeping Christmas Well Church and Culture Church and Ministry Church and Technology Church Life Church: What is a Church? Cities Code of Ethics for Pastors Contentment Creativity Cultural Commentary Culture Daily Reflections Dallas Willard Deliberating on Digital Dignity Easter Education Ephesus and the New Testament Ethics Eugene Peterson Evangelical Existential Questions Faith Faith and Work Family Food Friendship Fun Good Reads Gospel Centered Christianity Grace Handel's Messiah Harvard University Health High Calling History Holidays Holy Spirit Holy Week Hospitality How Does God Guide Us? Hunger Games Insights for Leaders - De Pree Center Inspiration from the High Calling Jesus Jesus: Following Him as a Disciple Jesus: Seven Last Words Jesus: Was Jesus Married? Jesus: What Was His Message? Jesus: Why Did He Have to Die? Laity Lodge Leadership Leadership Conversation Lent Les Miserables Life for Leaders Linda's Advent Doodles Linda's Lenten Doodles Living Well Loving Neighbors Max De Pree Center for Leadership Mental Health Mission of God and Missional Church Money Moral Dilemmas Mormonism Movies Nature New York City Pastors and Churches Pentecost Photos to Share Poetry Police Blotter Politics Prayer Preachers Portal Preaching Presbyterian Church Quotations Reading the Times Recommendations Reflecting on Technology Religion and Culture Ruminations Sabbath Science Seven Last Words Sexual Harassment Social Media Something to Think About Spiritual Warfare Sports Stations of the Cross Stephen Hawking: Heaven and Faith Stories Technology and Culture Technology and Education Technology and Mental Health Technology Bits Texas Thanksgiving The High Calling Thin Places Uncategorized Vocation Women Words Work Worship

Select a Month November 2018 October 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 March 2017 February 2017 December 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 April 2015 March 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 November 2010

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What does "Bethesda" mean?

Select your answer to see how you score.

House of olives House of bread House of mercy House of wind