Thrown Out to Witness

Last updated on: March 9, 2017 at 11:14 am by Libby Anne

Thrown Out to Witness 2017-03-09T11:14:13-04:00 Libby Anne

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Growing up in an evangelical home, I was taught that saving souls was the most important thing we could do. Because I was homeschooled, however, I wasn’t exposed to a lot of unsaved people as a child. There were the international students my parents sponsored, but these students were older than I was, and evangelizing them was more my parents’ game. I did try to evangelize several relatives, one aunt in particular, but (perhaps unsurprisingly) that didn’t go so well. One reason I decided to attend a secular college rather than a Christian one was my desire to evangelize—something I had found difficult to do in an already evangelical environment.

Evangelizing my peers in college didn’t go so well either, and looking back, I’m starting to realize why. Oh, there are lots of reasons evangelization will face challenges regardless of the particulars. Evangelicals tend to under-appreciate the staying power of more moderate or progressive Christian traditions, and they tend to undervalue these traditions more generally. Additionally, atheists and agnostics generally have a firm grip on why they believe or don’t belief what they do or don’t. There is usually a very narrow margin for evangelization—those who dissatisfied with their current belief structure and open to change.

But I had a more pressing problem. I stuck out, and not in a good way.

Let’s start with my physical appearance. I wore my hair in two braids every day, I didn’t pluck any facial hair (a mistake, with my genes), and I wore jumpers or T-shirts with frumpy skirts. In college. There were reasons for this, of course. I believed it was ungodly to spend too much time on my appearance, and that makeup or facial hair removal reflected an attempt to be physically attractive (something that fades and is fundamentally unimportant) rather than letting my inner beauty shine through. As for my clothes, well, I was trying not to draw attention to my curves, because curves could lead men to sin (i.e. lust).

I don’t have any pictures of myself to show, and it wasn’t a time in my life I really want to revisit. But what made me think about all this again was coming upon this picture on another blog:

The photo was captioned “MI Right to Life oratorical contest” and is from the blogger’s teenage years. But that dress. I remember those dresses. I wore those dresses too. I wore dresses like that in college.

And then I wondered why no one took me seriously.

When it comes down to it, if you want to evangelize someone, to persuade them to adopt a new belief system, you have to make them want what you have. And to do that, you have to make what you have attractive to them. I did know this, at the time. I suppose I thought what I had would shine through and that my appearances didn’t matter. The problem was not simply that appearances affect people’s perceptions whether we think they should or not—although the was at issue—but also that my appearances belied something else: my position as a cultural outsider.

I was a cultural outsider by design. I grew up outside mainstream American culture. My parents likened it to a greenhouse—they were raising me in an insulated evangelical homeschool environment to keep me safe until I was strong enough to weather the elements outside that environment. The result was that I had no idea how the world worked outside of my evangelical homeschool “greenhouse.” I didn’t understand cultural references, I didn’t even know how to talk to or interact with peers who weren’t homeschooled. It was like a foreign culture.

I didn’t know the culture, I didn’t understand the culture, I couldn’t speak the culture, and somehow I still thought I could evangelize the culture. It was a colossal, absolute blunder. Looking back it’s hard to believe I was that naive—but I was.

I would have done far better to learn to understand the culture and my peers. I would have done far better to dress in a way that did not automatically identify me as an outsider. I would have done far better to model a way to be an evangelical Christian without being a complete cultural outsider—a way people could adopt evangelical beliefs, if they were at a point in their lives where they were ready to try new ones, without walling themselves themselves off from the larger society.

But then, I didn’t know how to do those things myself.

Note: I am by not suggesting that we should judge people on their appearances or that women’s natural facial hair is a problem. I had a unibrow and was wearing culturally out of place clothing when I met the man who is now my husband; dressing and appearing this way does not make one unlovable. But if one’s goal is evangelizing, and not just living life and forming friendships, looking completely out of place and out of step with cultural norms is not going to smooth the way in a purely pragmatic sense.

I have a Patreon! Please support my writing!

Evangelicalism/Fundamentalism

Previous Post

March 8, 2017

Voting for Trump with Jesus in the Room

Next Post

March 9, 2017 Why Trump's Irish Merchandise Broke My Irony Meter

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Atheism Evangelicalism/Fundamentalism Family Feminism Homeschool Meta Parenting Patriarchy Politics Purity Quiverfull Social Justice Uncategorized Worthwhile reads

Select a Month February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What Jewish festival was being celebrated when the Holy Spirit descended at Pentecost?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Hanukkah Purim Passover Shavuot