Part 5: Chris Heuertz on How to Love Within Diverse Communities

Last updated on: February 5, 2013 at 9:00 am by Andrew Marin

Part 5: Chris Heuertz on How to Love Within Diverse Communities 2013-02-03T16:09:30-06:00 Andrew Marin

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

This is Part 5 of our interview with Chris Heuertz (his Facebook and Twitter) on his new, vulnerable book, Unexpected Gifts. In case you missed them, check out Part 1 (my overview of the book), Part 2 (the beginning lessons of living with Mother Teresa), Part 3 (on working with mutilated childhood soldiers in the Sierra Leone civil war) and Part 4 (on the importance of contemplative spirituality to sustain good work over the long haul).

Andrew: One of the most difficult aspects of “community” and incarnational living, is that it gets messy really quick. What best practices can you share with us from your two decades invested in loving within diverse communities.

Chris: “In my new book, Unexpected Gifts: Discovering the Way of Community, I try to unpack the messy assumption around our notions of community—assumptions that are sometimes filled with unrealistic idealizations of what it should be or what it might become. Many of those expectations often lead to disappointments, and in turn we find ourselves perpetually transitioning in and out of communities looking for the perfect one.

If we stay in a friendship, relationship or community long enough we will experience inevitable challenges. These inevitable challenges (things like failure, doubt, betrayal, the mundane, a loss of identity, sexual chemistry, messy transitions and others) are legitimate reasons for people to leave their communities. However, sometimes the reasons we leave are actually invitations to stay—and when we stay, work through these inevitable challenges, they often become unexpected gifts.

But one of the reasons many of us leave communities is because of how homogenized, insulated and isolated our communities tend to become.

Here’s a simple test to try:

Take out your cell phone and review the last ten calls you made or texts you sent. Who’s on that list? What names come up? How many of our recently contacted friends are people of a different race, ethnicity, or nationality? Do any names of folks outside our age bracket show up? For Christians, how many people on our call lists are Hindu, Muslim, Jewish, or even nonreligious? What about their sexual orientation? What does our circle of friends communicate to people whose sexual preferences are different from ours? How inclusive or isolated is our call history?

Not that one’s cell phone usage is the singular measure of the diversity in relationships, but for many people, the folks whose names appear in the call history staring back at us from our phones look a lot like we do. Many of us have a homogenized circle of friends who live like us, look like us, and probably even worship like us. Our call history is often a mirror of who we are. And, as a consequence, of who our community is.

So we need to begin by confessing the poverty of our friendships if we hope to allow the space and freedom for our communities to become more diverse, which ultimately is more human/divine in all its most beautiful ways.”

How have you all learned to love within diverse communities, or diverse settings where people believe different things as yourself?

Much love.

www.themarinfoundation.org

Contemplative Activism

Previous Post

February 5, 2013

Feb 5: My One Sentence Bible

Next Post

February 6, 2013 Feb 6: My One Sentence Bible

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Book Reviews Bridging Opposing Worldviews Culture Don't Drink and Drive Faith Guest Posts I'm Sorry Campaign Interviews Language Laura Statesir LGBT Living in the Tension Living in the Tension Gatherings Love Is an Orientation Love Is an Orientation Blog Love Is an Orientation Book Love Is an Orientation DVD Melinda Guerra Memory My One Sentence Bible Newsletter Our Last Option Parents & Families Politics Quick Quotes Quotes ReEngaging Civility Sexuality Speaking The Marin Foundation Theology Uncategorized Us Versus Us Videos Warren Perry Youth and Campus Ministry

Select a Month June 2016 May 2016 December 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz