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Lisa Duffy: A Million Unheard Souls

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Are You Ready Now to Accept the Medicine Pope Francis Recommends to End Your Suffering?

Are You Ready Now to Accept the Medicine Pope Francis Recommends to End Your Suffering?

Last updated on: July 6, 2016 at 7:00 am by Lisa Duffy

Are You Ready Now to Accept the Medicine Pope Francis Recommends to End Your Suffering? 2016-07-05T17:13:21-04:00 Lisa Duffy

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By Amanda Rose

It’s natural to look for someone who understands our pain. It offers a bit of balm for our wounded soul. But ultimately, as Pope Francis has so tenderly reminded us, our healing comes through prayer, through building or rebuilding our relationship with God.

Photo by Dawn Armfield, Unsplash.Com, CC

I was the first woman in my group of Catholic moms to be divorced. I felt ashamed and alone. There was no one who understood my pain, no one who understood my devastation. The internet led me to some online support groups that helped me feel like I wasn’t alone. I found companions on this journey – a journey none of us had wanted to take. Whether we were abandoned or left a marriage due to abuse, the journey isn’t a barrel of laughs. It’s hard and it hurts. We wonder when there be an end to our suffering.

Pope Francis acknowledged these hidden sufferings during the Prayer Vigil to “Dry the Tears” held in St. Peter’s Basilica on May 5th of this Jubilee Year of Mercy. There have been jubilee events this year for the ill and disabled but this vigil was for those suffering interiorly. In the words of Pontifical Counsel of the New Evangelization in their press release for this vigil:

“The sufferings—large or small—that every person carries inside are many and varied, but they all have in common that they bring “a struggle” to life and, often, a lack of hope and faith.”

Dangling Without a Net

As divorced Catholics, we may carry feelings of betrayal, fear, loneliness, anger, grief or crushing disappointment. We may struggle to hold onto hope and faith, and sometimes we may lose them and feel like we’re dangling without a net. We distrust a God who could allow the break-up of our marriage. We feel cheated because he didn’t answer our prayer as we begged him to bless our family.

Pope Francis describes well the anguish we go through in his meditation at the vigil:

At times of sadness, suffering and sickness, amid the anguish of persecution and grief, everyone looks for a word of consolation. We sense a powerful need for someone to be close and feel compassion for us. We experience what it means to be disoriented, confused, more heartsick than we ever thought possible. We look around us with uncertainty, trying to see if we can find someone who really understands our pain.

Relationship With God On The Rocks?

It’s natural to look for someone who understands our pain. It offers a bit of balm for our wounded soul. But ultimately our healing comes through prayer, through building or rebuilding our relationship with God.

Relationships are never static. Our relationship with God also changes. It grows and deepens as we spend time in prayer and growing in the virtues. On the other hand, it can deteriorate as any friendship would if we distance ourselves and gradually stop communication. Perhaps we offer a few perfunctory words or actions. If we haven’t abandoned Sunday Mass, we may carelessly make the sign of the Cross as we dip our fingers in the Holy Water as we enter the sanctuary. We offer the sign of peace while nurturing anger. We say the words of the prayers but they lie dead our mouths. Can God revive our hearts? How long will we suffer alone?

The Medicine for Our Suffering

The good news is that we don’t have to be alone. There is hope and there can be comfort. There is a true medicine for our suffering.

In the moment of confusion, dismay and tears, Christ’s heart turned in prayer to the Father. Prayer is the true medicine for our suffering. In prayer, we too can feel God’s presence. The tenderness of his gaze comforts us; the power of his word supports us and gives us hope. – Pope Francis, Meditation at Prayer Vigil to “Dry the Tears”

We can turn our heart in prayer to the Father as Christ set the example for us. It is only in prayer that we will be able to accept the medicine for our suffering that he offers.

Although I did find companionship through that online forum for divorced Catholics, it was prayer that sustained me. My online friends had no answers, but we had a communion of souls struggling to stay close to Christ; using all our strength to continue believing that God was still with us. We were finding God amidst the shambles of our lives.

It’s been seven years since my divorce and sometimes I still struggle to find answers when questions assault me. However, these questions are ultimately only answered in the silent communication of loving prayer. I can attest that these words of Pope Francis from the Vigil are true because I have lived through many moments of “confusion, dismay and tears.” I have felt the “tenderness of his gaze and the power of his word” in the scriptures.

God will never abandon you. He is close to you. The Holy Spirit will help to sustain and console you. Turn to our Lord and pray, “Jesus, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.” Reach out and let him take your hand. Let him be mercy to you.

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