5 Steps To End Unwanted Attention After a Bad Date

Last updated on: June 24, 2016 at 10:00 am by Lisa Duffy

5 Steps To End Unwanted Attention After a Bad Date 2016-06-24T10:00:16-04:00 Lisa Duffy

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3. Do not give a reason for your request.

Once you’ve broken up, you don’t need to give a reason for wanting contact to stop. In some circumstances this just adds more fuel to the fire by providing them with an objection to overcome, like a used car salesman trying to get you to pay top dollar for the ugliest car on the lot.

4. Do not apologize for your request.

You do not owe them an apology when you state your request simply and with respect. Apologizing may encourage further contact by giving an emotional manipulator ammunition to try to make you feel guilty about not wanting to talk to them.

5. Do not respond to further communication.

Do not answer their calls, do not respond to their texts or emails, and do not react on social media. Responding, even to again ask to not be contacted, gives them the attention they want.

Then What?

These five steps should extinguish the burning flames of desire in a normal person. If the person continues to attempt contact with you after a few days or so, especially if the contact increases in frequency or anger, then the behavior is moving towards harassment or stalking and not simply annoying behavior.

Even if contact doesn’t include threats or angry messages, frequent contact, as little as once a week in some states, may still constitute harassment, stalking, or menacing behavior in your state. Take action sooner rather than later to protect your peace of mind and possibly to protect your safety.

Safety First

If at any time there are threats, violence, or other behaviors or communications that scare you then please contact your local law enforcement agency or call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 for advice. They can help you assess possible safety concerns and guide in what your next steps should be if it is a dangerous situation. It is better to over-react and be safe than to under-react and leave yourself at risk.

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Lisa Duffy

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