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Learning to Choose What’s Better

Learning to Choose What’s Better

Last updated on: July 9, 2025 at 12:00 pm by Lee Ann B. Marino

Learning to Choose What’s Better 2025-06-03T16:58:41-04:00 Lee Ann B. Marino

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The Biblical story of Martha and Mary is an interesting look at God’s word to overachievers in every age. Found in Luke 10:38-42, we see Martha, excessively preoccupied with serving and making preparations, as Jesus was their guest. Then we see Mary, Martha’s sister, seated at the feet of Jesus as He spoke and taught. Martha grew annoyed that Mary just sat there while she did all the work. As a result, she complained to Jesus. Jesus’ response to Martha was:

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:41-42, NIV)

On first glance, why would Jesus say this? Most of us understand Christians should serve, so why was Martha called to attention…and Mary not? If we want to recognize Jesus’ message to all of us, we must dive a bit into cultural expectation to understand what happens in the text.

Jesus with Martha and Mary of Bethany

Martha and Mary, Public Domain

Meeting worldly expectations

Among several ancient cultures, hospitality was of vital importance. Nations were judged by the way they served their guests. As a result, Martha wasn’t of service because it was what she genuinely wanted to do or felt called to do. She was acting out of custom. It might sound like a nice custom – even an important one – but her motivation was a sense of obligation. She was meeting the expectations of the world, not the expectations of God. And, as people often do in these situations, she resented the fact that her sister wasn’t living up to the same expectations.

Mary chose not to meet worldly expectations, but instead followed the Lord’s leading. Had Jesus asked Mary for a drink, I have no doubt she would have provided it for Him. She was not unwilling to be of service to the Lord, nor was she shirking duty. Mary was attentive with and to the Lord; she did not let worldly cares interfere or distract her time with Him.

All of us who live in Christ know the importance of spending time with Him absent the distractions of this world. He is the One thing needed, and it is better to choose Him over the cares of this world. Even though the many cares of this world may seem overwhelming, they cannot be more important to us that the Lord.

Service to the Lord, not the world

Emphasizing the issue of service, Christians are called to be in the service of the Lord – not the service of the world. Martha’s service was a worldly one. She was not trying to please the Lord, but
working to meet a societal or worldly custom. The story of Martha and Mary addresses the issue that it is not just being of service, but why and to Whom we are of service that matters.

I grew up in a church where the women were very service-minded. You were judged by the amount of service you performed for the church. The sad truth about the service many of them did, however, was that it was Martha work. They did their tasks out of a deep sense of worldly obligation rather than rendering unto the Lord. No matter what they might have said, the services they performed were not for Jesus. The proof of that is that Jesus never told them to do it! They would not sit still long enough to learn of the Lord and find direction in their lives.

Making the right choices

Choosing to turn aside from worldly expectations and follow the Lord is a choice – we don’t fall into it, but rather, we choose it. I believe the story of Martha and Mary holds within it a special message for many of us, especially as Christians. So often, we spend our lives feeling like we just don’t measure up to the world’s standards. We spend our lives running around, trying to meet worldly expectations. More of us spend our lives trying to be Marthas than Marys – and we need to back up, examine this, and promptly change it as we draw nearer to our Lord and Savior, Jesus
Christ.

The housework can wait. The children can wait. Our spouses can wait. Work can wait. Take time to sit at the Lord’s feet and learn from Him. Everything this side of heaven will one day change, but Jesus will never change. We need to make that choice to choose Christ over the distractions of this world.

Finding our center

We will never discover our personal call to the Lord’s service if we do not take the time to sit at His feet and hear His voice. We can all use a reminder from time to time that we are called to be Marys – not Marthas. The constantly puts pressure on us to live up to certain expectations that, as we can see in the story of Martha and Mary, can actually take us away from God rather than toward Him.

As we find a better understanding of our Christ-centered calling, others may not understand our choices. Following Christ is counter-culture. Every society feeds us messages to produce for it – rather than serving God. It takes courage to follow God in the way Mary did. As she sat at Jesus’ feet, she did not have a care in the world about worldly desires, thoughts, or what Martha might have been
doing. That kind of focus, dedication, and attentiveness can place any one of us in the very center of God’s will for our lives because we are not distracted by everything else in life.

This can be difficult to attain, but that doesn’t make it impossible. Those who are in our lives must learn to respect that God is first and that He comes first. We don’t attend to the things of God after we are done attending to everything else. Herein was precisely Martha’s problem: she did not make the things of God her first priority. She attended to everything but those of God, and was angry when Mary did not leave spiritual things and attend to worldly ones with her.

Embracing the truth about Martha and Mary

Being of service to others is a great thing. However, if service takes the place of God in our lives, it is time to realize we aren’t in service to God. Marthas, take some time and spend it with the Lord to gain direction and guidance in your life. Marys, never regret or feel guilty for your choice, no matter what others may tell you. A Martha heart chooses the world. A Mary heart chooses what’s better.

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About Lee Ann B. Marino

Dr. Lee Ann B. Marino, Ph.D., D.Min., D.D. (”The Spitfire”) is “everyone’s favorite theologian” leading Gen X, Millennials, and Gen Z as apostle of Spitfire Apostolic Ministries. Her work encompasses study and instruction on leadership training and development, typology, Pneumatology, conceptual theology, Ephesians 4:11 ministry, and apostolic theology. She is author of over thirty-five books, host of the top twenty percentile podcast Kingdom Now, and serves as founder and overseer of Sanctuary International Fellowship Tabernacle - SIFT and Chancellor of Apostolic Covenant Theological Seminary. Dr. Marino has over twenty-five years of experience in ministry, leadership, counseling, mentoring, education, and business. You can read more about the author here.

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