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October 2018

October 09, 2018

President Trump Blasts Allies Due To Hurricane Michael

Washington DC - Hurricane Michael is approaching America’s Gulf Coast. President Trump is blasting NATO...

October 08, 2018

Catholic Church Tries Out Communion Fondue

Montpelier, Vermont - This may be the smallest state capital in the United States of America...

October 07, 2018

Mike Pence And A White House JesusWeen

Vice President Mike Pence is planning the first official White House JesusWeen. In keeping...

October 06, 2018

Brett Kavanaugh To Fight A Kangaroo

White House - As per his deal with President Trump, Supreme Court nominee Brett...

October 03, 2018

President Trump Renames New Mexico

Washington DC- President Trump signed Executive Order #1,938 today, and in doing so changed...

October 01, 2018

President Trump Orders FBI To Investigate The 13th Amendment

Washington DC - President Trump ordered the FBI to investigate the 13th Amendment of...

September 2018

September 28, 2018

Brett Kavanaugh And OJ Simpson Search For The Real Criminals

Vowing to bring the real criminals to justice, Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh and...

September 25, 2018

President Trump Pardons Bill Cosby

Washington DC - President Trump pardoned comedian and TV legend Bill Cosby today. Mr. Cosby...

September 23, 2018

President Trump Orders Bicycle Lanes Demolished

Washington DC - Citing bicycle lanes as a threat to national security, President Trump...

September 19, 2018

President Trump Withdraws US From The Treaty Of Versailles

Washington DC - Citing the 1919 Treaty of Versailles as “the worst deal in...

September 18, 2018

Trump Wins Trade War And US Gets China’s Great Wall

Washington DC - President Trump announced he won the trade war with China. The...

September 15, 2018

Military Refuses President Trump’s Order To Assassinate Hurricane Florence

Washington DC - New leaks reveal President Trump ordered the assassination of hurricane Florence...

September 14, 2018

Christians In Indiana Litter Road To Thwart Satanists

Zion, Indiana - Christians are carrying their crosses and their trash from Chik-fil-A to litter...

September 13, 2018

Minister Eats Nikes During Church

Belgrade, Maine - Reverend Andrew Canard of the First Avenue Baptist Church ate a...

September 12, 2018

Donald Trump States Being Anti-Straw Is Anti-American

Washington DC - President Trump is taking a bold stance and championing straws. In a...

September 11, 2018

Creationist To Walk 2 Penguins From Antarctica To The Middle East

Trinity Church, Antarctica - A prominent researcher of the Great Flood is hoping to...

September 10, 2018

God Takes A Break From Facebook

Heaven - God the Almighty, Tamer Of Leviathan, and LORD is taking some time...

September 09, 2018

School District Bans Scientific ‘Theories’

Fredonia, Arkansas - The school board for the Fredonia County School District voted unanimously to...

September 06, 2018

President Trump Measures The Noses Of Senior Officials

WASHINGTON - In the wake of the New York Times publishing an opinion piece...

September 04, 2018

Trump Administration Cancels UN Science Funding

Washington DC - Citing the war against fake news, fake facts, and fake scientific...

August 2018

August 30, 2018

Donald Jr And Eric Trump Give Their Dad A Parade

White House - The Pentagon postponed President Trump’s military parade. The event was set...

August 28, 2018

President Trump Endorses The ‘Back To Africa Movement’

Columbus, Ohio - President Trump addressed a campaign rally last night and declared his support...

August 27, 2018

Iceland Raises Age Of Religious Consent To 21

Reykjavik, Iceland – The island country of 330,000 nestled in the North Atlantic is making big...

August 26, 2018

President Trump Caught Red Handed In Baby-Gunpowder Plot

Washington DC - Security arrested President Trump and a handful of loyal lickspittles last...

August 26, 2018

Arkansas Minister Sells Believers ‘Heavenly Air’ In Mason Jars

Pangburn, Arkansas - Reverend Lucius E. Polk is selling Heaven’s Air out of his...

August 24, 2018

Betsy DeVos Orders Flat Earth Disks In Every Classroom

Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos is using federal funds to ensure discs depicting a flat...

August 23, 2018

Melania Trump To Star in ‘Real Housewife Of The White House’

Washington DC - From the producers who brought us The Real Housewives of Orange...

August 22, 2018

Queen Elizabeth Offers Tower Of London To Imprison President Trump

London, England - Londoners are apprehensive about the lack of any coherent plan concerning the...

August 21, 2018

Pumpkin Spice Riots Erupt In Boston

It’s late August in Boston. Typically, August is a quiet time for this city. College...

August 20, 2018

President Trump Slaps Tariffs On French Fries

Washington DC - President Trump escalated the trade war with Europe by slapping a 25%...

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