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January 2019

January 11, 2019

President Trump Demands ‘Burrito Tax’ For Border Wall

Washington DC - President Trump is telling Congress to pass a special tax on...

January 10, 2019

Donald Trump Jr Turns Immigrant Detention Centers Into Zoos

Donald Trump Jr. attempted to support his father’s idea of a border wall by...

January 09, 2019

President Trump Urges Americans To Boycott Chinese Restaurants

Washington DC - President Trump addressed the country last night about the need for...

January 08, 2019

The NRA Agrees To Build Trump’s Wall

Washington DC - The National Rifle Association (NRA) is building President Trump’s border wall....

January 07, 2019

Vice President Pence Kicked Out Of Iceland

Reykjavik, Iceland - Icelandic officials prevented Vice President Mike Pence from entering their country...

January 05, 2019

President Trump Loses Key Evangelical Support

President Trump lost a key evangelical ally. A powerful group of ministers that up until...

January 03, 2019

President Trump Demands A Wall Just Like Australia’s

Washington DC- President Trump called a press conference today and restated his position about...

January 02, 2019

Mississippi Town Opens Thoughts And Prayers Medical Center

Thaxton, Mississippi - This municipality may only have 238 residents, but it’s dreaming big....

January 01, 2019

Donald Trump’s Diet And Exercise Plan For 2019

President Trump always said he was a great athlete. The President’s physician states Trump is...

December 2018

December 31, 2018

Men’s Fitness Journal Sues Jordan Peterson

Men’s Fitness Journal is suing Professor Jordan Peterson, the famed academic, public speaker, and...

December 30, 2018

Betsy DeVos Moderates Flat Earth Roundtable

United States Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos moderated a discussion of thought leaders at...

December 29, 2018

Melania Trump Is Now A Registered Sex Worker In Amsterdam

Amsterdam, Netherlands - First Lady of the United States Melania Trump is now an...

December 28, 2018

Vice President Pence Suspects He’s Gay

Washington DC - Vice President Mike Pence suspects he is a rabid homosexual after...

December 28, 2018

President Trump Drops Wolves On US-Mexico Border

Washington DC - President Trump ended the government shutdown today by announcing a low cost...

December 27, 2018

Natural Health Fans Are Infusing Urine Into Vodka

Sherley, MA - Amber Canard is a licensed natiformopath and a self-described expert in...

December 26, 2018

President Trump Blasts Boxing Day And Justin Trudeau

Washington, DC - President Trump went to Twitter early this morning. He ranted about...

December 25, 2018

Satanists Perform A Living Great Flood On Christmas Day

Boston MA - Members of The Satanic Mosque (TSM) re-enacted the biblical Great Flood...

December 24, 2018

BREAKING NEWS: Santa Claus IS Satan

North Pole - After centuries of controversy and conjecture, Santa Claus is putting all...

December 22, 2018

President Trump Demands A Wall With Canada

Washington DC - Incensed the Democrats didn’t fund his border wall with Mexico, President...

December 20, 2018

Jordan Peterson Joins Vice President Pence’s Task Force

Washington DC - Famed author and psychologist Jordan Peterson is joining Vice President Pence’s...

December 19, 2018

Santa Claus Revives Coal Industry Thanks To President Trump

North Pole - Santa Claus has seized the world’s supply of coal and not...

December 18, 2018

Donald Trump Jr In Surfing Accident While Visiting Hawaii

Honolulu, Hawaii — While taking a family vacation with the entire Trump clan, Donald...

December 17, 2018

Iceland Arrests Evangelicals For Saying ‘Merry Christmas’

Reykjavik, Iceland - Twenty-two American evangelicals were arrested last night for saying Merry Christmas. They...

December 16, 2018

President Trump Bans ’Feliz Navidad’ From White House

Washington DC - President Donald Trump is banning the classic Christmas song Feliz Navidad...

December 14, 2018

New Study Finds Jordan Peterson Fans Are Mentally Ill

A new study from the University of Melbourne in Australia finds those who self...

December 09, 2018

Donald Trump Replaced Krampus In Annual Krampus Run

Berlin, Vermont - Little Billy Toaletten is only nine-years-old, but he’s a veteran in the traditional...

December 08, 2018

ICE Unveils App To Deport Illegal Immigrants

Washington DC - The Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) released a new app for iPhone and...

December 06, 2018

Tiffany Trump Adopts Nigerian Children

President Trump may think Nigeria is a crappy country, but daughter Tiffany thinks otherwise....

December 05, 2018

President Trump Blasts Bush Family On Twitter

George Herbert Walker Bush is being put to rest today. Politicians and notable notables...

December 04, 2018

Boy Scouts Are Selling Deadly Christmas Trees

Atlanta, GA - The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) released shocking new findings concerning deadly...

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