Millard Says, “Use Sheep Instead of Lawnmowers”

Last updated on: August 19, 2013 at 3:06 pm by Kermit Zarley

Millard Says, “Use Sheep Instead of Lawnmowers” 2013-08-19T15:06:43-07:00 Kermit Zarley

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Today’s USA TODAY has an interesting article on p. 3 entitled “The USA Is Getting Its Goats.” It’s about people and various entities in the U.S. increasingly using goats and sheep to keep the brush, weeds, and grass clipped. They’re using them to replace lawnmowers. It’s better for the environment and cheaper. No more spraying chemicals. This article compares the costs in detail.

Sheep eat grass, and goats eat everything else but grass. Both of them eat all day, only laying down to take a brief rest occasionally. I like sheep, first, and goats, second. When I was a child, living near Yakima, Washington, I was allergic to cow’s milk. So, my mother bought a goat, milked it, and fed me goat’s milk. One day, that goat butted her so bad in her butt that she got mad and sold him. Many years later, again in Yakima, I almost became a sheepherder in order to keep the grass clipped low.

I’m an idea guy. Always have been. I constantly get ideas. I think of how to improve something that already exists or create something new that makes life just a little bit easier. See my previous posts about “Inventing a Better Golf Club” (“Part 1” on 6/24, “Part 2” on 7/1, and “Part 3” on 7/9.) That’s why I started an invention business five years ago. (See trianglebook.com.) I think some of my ideas are pretty good, but some of them are absolute hairbrainers. That’s what I always thought about my idea for using sheep, that is, until I read this article today. Now I’m thinking maybe that idea wasn’t so bad after all.

I was born in Seattle, Washington, went to college in Houston, Texas, and lived most of my life there. But during the 1970s, I purchased 60 acres of land just outside the city of Yakima. My primary purpose for acquiring this land was to build a nine-hole golf course on it with an experimental course design I had thought of as a teenager due to reading books on the history of golf and old golf course design. My idea was to build the course so that one day golfers would play it in one direction, and the next day they would play the course in the opposite direction. It would have one extra green and two sets of tees for each hole. I called it “the reversible course,” which wasn’t a new name.

In fact, my reversible course idea wasn’t new, either. That’s how golf started. The Old Course at St. Andrews, England, was the first golf course in the world. At first, it consisted of only three golf holes that went straight out. Then the golfers turned around and played those same three holes backwards to their original starting location. Eventually, that added three more holes that continued straight out. My reversible course idea was basically the same, but with added improvements. No golf courses had ever been constructed like I planned to make mine. And no golf courses had been played forwards and backwards since the early history of golf, a game that started in Scotland and then England about 500 years ago.

However, there has always been much dispute about the early history of golf. I think its because those golfing Scots drank too much of their own, refined whiskey and thus couldn’t remember what they did. Some people say that golf has eighteen holes because those Scots would sip a nip from the bottle on every tee, and the bottle was dry after eighteen holes. That’s surely how they got the term “19th hole.”

In 1981, I decided not to compete on the PGA TOUR that summer. Instead, my family and I spent the entire summer in Yakima as an experiment to see if I wanted to make this golf course idea become a reality. I used heavy equipment to clear the land and shape the greens throughout the summer. But soon after we arrived there, I implemented one of my hairbrain ideas. I told my wife Marilyn and our three children–Christy, Monica, and Michael–“Go to the stockyard auction and buy three sheep.” They said, “What for?” I didn’t want to tell them. Because, when I then did so, they all said, “Are you crazy?” I’ve been accused of worse.

Nevertheless, they did what I said, coming back with three rather unruly, and very wooly, white sheep. I built a wire pen for them, which didn’t always work. I spent some wasted time chasing and catching sheep. Why the sheep? I wanted to see how well they would eat grass. That is, I wanted to know if they would keep the turf cut low enough to play golf on it. That’s how golf was played for centuries in the old country. Their lawnmowers were sheep.

Did my three sheep keep the grass cut down enough to play golf on it? The jury was still out on that one. As for the golf course I was starting to build, at the end of that summer I had to abandon the idea. My life, and that of my family, would have been quite different if I had carried through with it.

That summer, I phoned my close friend Joel Goldstrand in Minnesota. We had been roommates in college, he was best man in my wedding, and he played the Tour for a few years. Joel was now the club pro at Minneapolis Golf Club and designing golf courses in his spare time. I asked Joel various questions about grass and course design. When I told him my unique course design idea, he thought it was a terrific idea and asked me if I’d mind if he tried it. I told him OK, but I said I didn’t want him to talk about it much. If I completed my project, and golfers liked it, I might make golf course design my future occupation. I didn’t, but Joel did. During the 1980s he designed and built eight, reversible, nine-hole golf courses in Minnesota and Iowa. They were the first such golf courses ever constructed in the Western Hemisphere. They still exist. I’m told that the golfers who play them love their unique golf course.

Well, my family returned from that stockyard auction with one more animal–a cute puppy dog. He was half Black Labrador and half Weimaraner, and he became our family dog for the next fifteen years. The kids gave him his name and had a big laugh doing so. What was it? They knew that I didn’t like my middle name and that I wouldn’t ever tell it to anyone unless I had to. I was a junior, so I got it from my dad, and he got it from my Zarley grandparents.

What is it? Millard! As in Kermit Millard Zarley Junior. Now, that’s a whackey, hairbrain idea for a name if ever there was one. Comedian Bob Hope thought so, too. I’m glad he didn’t know about the Millard part. No telling what he would have done with that.

(In 1965 on national television, Bob Hope nicknamed Kermit Zarley “the pro from the moon” because of his unusual name.)

Golf

Joel Goldstrand

reversible course

Previous Post

August 15, 2013

The Israeli-Palestinian Peace Process Is Revived

Next Post

August 20, 2013 More Turmoil in the Lawless Northern Sinai Peninsula

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Angels Billy Graham Blog Description Book Reviews Christian Living Christianity Christology Church History Current Events Deity of Christ? Disarmament Eschatology Evangelicalism Ezekiel 38-39 Film Reviews God Golf Gospel Harmonization Health History Holy Spirit Incarnation? Interview Islam Israeli-Palestinian Conflict Jesus Last Empire Literary Announcements Major Championship Winners Masters Monotheism My Books New Testament Old Testament Politics Primitive Weapons Ryder Cup Science Society of Biblical Literature The Bible The Restitution of Jesus Christ Trinitarianism Trinity? Uncategorized Unconditional Love? War on Terrorism

Select a Month October 2026 September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 May 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What did God create on the first day?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Plants Animals Light Land

Books by This Author Books by Kermit Zarley Blog

See All Titles »