Fundamentalism and Wife Abuse: A Matter of Conscience

Last updated on: May 13, 2015 at 5:48 pm by John Shore

Fundamentalism and Wife Abuse: A Matter of Conscience 2015-05-13T17:48:25-08:00 John Shore

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Yesterday my piece “Bible Believing” Pastors and the Enabling of Domestic Violence was published by Huffington Post. Shortly thereafter it was featured on Yahoo.com.

Shortly thereafter beganeth the outcry of complaints against me.

Twitter!

Well, whaddaya gonna do? You stand under a mass of flocking birds, you get crappethed upon. (I also got a lot of love and support, for which, as always, I’m grateful.)

Perfectly representative of the complaints I’ve received about my essay is the email below, just in. It says exactly what so many bold Defenders of the Faith have been saying to me that I thought I’d take a moment to address it:

I just read your article that appeared in The Huffington Post about the Pastor whose daughter was in an abusive relationship. One of the things you said to this Pastor absolutely infuriated me! You stated that because of the subservient teachings of the Bible that if a man wanted to beat or otherwise abuse his wife it was okay and that a woman would just “take it” or face hell. I happen to be a women who believes in marriage as the Bible states and no where in the scripture have I ever seen evidence that God has sanctioned this type of behavior from a husband toward his wife. It is absolutely absurd that you would associate that type of behavior with Biblical teachings! Husbands and wives are supposed to love, honor and respect each other, entreating each other in the same love that God has displayed toward the church. They are not supposed to abuse each other and no TRUE pastor would tell one of his congregants that she should just tolerate abuse or face hell. In such a case the “unbeliever” (which is the abuser, because no “believer” would justify that type of treatment toward their spouse since it is completely against the tenets of Christianity) needs to leave or the person being abused needs to leave. God NEVER intended for any of us to be someone’s punching bag!!

So, to be … in some magical way clearer than I was in my original post: Nowhere, not once, at any point, ever, did I write that the Bible sanctions a husband beating his wife.

Nor did I ever write that a Christian woman should just “take it or face hell.”

What I said was:

He [the Christian fundamentalist husband] is free to beat her [his fundamentalist wife] if he wants to, confident in the knowledge that, because of the way you trained her, [fundamentalist] pastor, because of what you made her believe about herself, she’ll take it. She’ll take it or (she believes) she’ll go to hell.

Look, fundamentalists: Rail and complain and struggle against it until you collapse, but the truth remains the truth. And the truth is that if you institutionalize the teaching that God has decreed that wives should submit to their husbands, then it is one-hundred percent inevitable that a lot of husbands so inculcated are going to feel as if they have God’s authorization to beat their wives. And, believing it their duty to practice “sacrificial obedience” (not to mention because they don’t want to go to hell for being “rebellious” Christians), a lot of women so inculcated are going to silently suffer those beatings.

That’s not me talking. That’s you talking. You believe that women were born to serve men. You believe that God wants every woman to be utterly fulfilled having no options in life besides motherhood and serving as her husband’s “helpmeet.” You believe that chief amongst those disciplines that should be practiced by the good Christian wife is that of “sacrificial obedience” to her husband.

No one is saying that those beliefs, in and of themselves, cause wife abuse. But any fool can understand that those beliefs are most certainly soil in which the evil weed of wife abuse very readily takes root, grows, and is cultivated.

Complementarianism (the view that the “created order” of roles for men and women is for men to be leaders and women to support men) fuels wife abuse in the exact same way that the vile Christian belief that black people are cursed by God (the so-called “mark of Cain”) fuels the KKK.*

That fundamentalism fosters wife abuse isn’t an issue between me and you, fundamentalist. It isn’t an issue between “progressive” Christians and “Bible-believing” Christians. It isn’t an issue between Christianity and “secular” society.

It’s an issue between you and your conscience.

And if it’s not, it sure as hell should be.

*From Wikipedia’s article, Curse and the mark of Cain: The split between the Northern and Southern Baptist organizations arose over slavery and the education of slaves. At the time of the split, the Southern Baptist group used the curse of Cain as a justification for slavery.”

Christian Issues

Previous Post

May 11, 2015

She has no sex drive. Is it immoral to allow her husband to sleep with his ex?

Next Post

May 15, 2015 Women being "subservient" is everything Jesus opposed

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Christian Issues Christian Spirituality Dear John En Espanol Everywhere She's Not Humor Look See Pastor Bob's Corner Personal Portuguese Relationships Russian Short-short story Smith Family Chronicles Uncategorized

Select a Month March 2024 August 2022 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 February 2020 December 2019 June 2019 December 2018 May 2018 May 2017 January 2017 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Which Genesis figure "walked with God and was no more, for God took him"?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Seth Abraham Enoch Lamech

Books by This Author Books by John Shore

See All Titles »