Do “good” Christians help you avoid temptation?

Last updated on: October 23, 2012 at 8:45 am by John Shore

Do “good” Christians help you avoid temptation? 2012-10-23T08:45:37-08:00 John Shore

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

I’m 21, a Southern Baptist raised, but with an open heart. I was “saved” in 4th grade, baptized in 6th. Yet . . . I’ve been a lukewarm Christian most of my life. Good kid, good grades, didn’t use any drugs or alcohol till I was 16/17. Nor did I have a strong relationship with God.

Fast forward: failed out of my freshman year at Alabama, then lived as a prodigal son in my parents’ home; moved out, then had a road to Damascus moment and started devoting my life to Christ again.

My problem is that I have a very hard time connecting with Christians, or finding a group of Christians I can relate with and enjoy. I have a lot of Christian friends, some who truly follow Christ, but most don’t. But I can’t seem to relate or have any connection with the truly devote ones: the only thing I truly have in common with most of them is Christ. I’ve made a few attempts to hang with them outside of church, but it feels like I’m trying to hang out with them because I have to, or because it’s the right thing, instead of because I want to.

The reason I’m stressing this so much is that I’ve been struggling with going back to my old ways of drinking and stuff again and don’t want to go back to that.

So my question is: Do you think you have to be with Christians that you don’t necessarily have anything in common with besides Christ in order to stay out of temptation’s way? It would seem the answer is yes, obviously; I know that it’s true. I guess i just need to grow a pair and just live for Christ no matter what.

So first of all there’s no such thing as staying out of temptation’s way. It’s like trying to stay out of the way of air: you can’t, because it’s everywhere. The desire to waste oneself via physical indulgence isn’t a problem with what’s outside in the world. It’s a problem with what’s inside each and every one of us. Everyone is seriously prone to damaging excess, and everyone struggles against it their entire lives. You will, too. It sucks. But, alas, it’s part of being human. (And later we can, and, duh, really should, talk about this.)

Secondly, no, you don’t have to hang out with anyone with whom you’re not comfortable hanging out. If you don’t enjoy hanging out with someone, there’s a really valid reason for that. Pay attention to that reason. Respect it. It’s trying to tell you something about those people that you’d be a fool to ignore.

Mostly it’s trying to tell you to go find someone you do enjoy being with. Do that! Life’s too short to spend it with people you don’t love being with.

You’ve got a deeper problem, though, than just not liking the people you feel you should. That’s really just a distraction for you. Your real problem is that you don’t know who you are. And that’s cool. You’re young. Young people never know who they are; they haven’t had time yet for life to prove to them who they are.

You’re just stuck in that weird “I’m not a kid anymore; I know shit now; but I have no idea who I am or what I’m doing” phase of life. When I was there I got high, a lot. Didn’t help. Made it worse. Don’t recommend.

I’ll tell you one thing: you need to get your ass back to college. Fail to do that and I guarantee that within a year your life will have narrowed down so fast you’ll think you fell into quicksand. The world is brutal to people without an education. Without a piece of paper signed by a Big Deal Institution attesting to the fact that you’re smart and know how to think (whether you are or do or not), you’re fully hosed. Without a degree all you can do is get some scratch-ass job you’ll hate but be stuck in.

And that’s not even the real reason to go to college. The real reason is that you don’t know who you are. And a lot of that is because you don’t know what your options in life are. Well, college gives you those options. College is the whole world handed to you for your perusal and enjoyment; it offers you nothing but choices you can choose about what you like, what you find interesting, what moves your spirit and mind. It not just encourages you to become the best you you can be, it sort of makes you the best you you can be. It offers you templates you can fill in with yourself.

Just trust me: Go to college. And take it seriously. Make that what you do for the next huge chunk of your life. Beg your parents to pay for you to return to school. If they won’t, beg them some more. And keep begging them until they relent. If they simply can’t afford it, then make it happen some other way. But go.

If you return to college you have a chance in life. If you don’t, then . . . then you make of yourself a horse it’s hard to bet on. Then you will drink yourself into nowhere, because nothing else will seem as appealing to you. That’ll be your best option.

(Btw: in my absolute arrogance, stubbornness, and full-on anti-everythingness I sure as hell didn’t go to college once I was released from high-school. Which is how I found myself at 38 years old making $11.00 an hour pushing around a mail cart and cleaning the kitchen in a law office. Not. Good. Go to college! Without it your mind only knows what you bring it, and . . . you can only learn so much watching TV and playing video games. Again: trust me on this. An uneducated person is too much like a mouse stuck in a maze. You want something better; and if you don’t now, you sure will later. Promise.)

Christian Issues

Previous Post

October 22, 2012

I got married to God by a Bad News Bear

Next Post

October 24, 2012 Post-posters and proposal post

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Christian Issues Christian Spirituality Dear John En Espanol Everywhere She's Not Humor Look See Pastor Bob's Corner Personal Portuguese Relationships Russian Short-short story Smith Family Chronicles Uncategorized

Select a Month March 2024 August 2022 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 February 2020 December 2019 June 2019 December 2018 May 2018 May 2017 January 2017 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What did the angel tell Mary she would name her son?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Peter Immanuel Jesus John

Books by This Author Books by John Shore

See All Titles »