Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
Progressive Christian
Church Authority, Smurch Schmashmority

Church Authority, Smurch Schmashmority

Last updated on: November 14, 2010 at 4:48 pm by John Shore

Church Authority, Smurch Schmashmority 2010-11-14T16:48:25-08:00 John Shore

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

I’m not generally keen on acquiescing to authority. I couldn’t even manage to join the Cub Scouts when I was a kid: one time, when I was just considering joining, the Den Daddy, or whatever he was called, cried out, “Okay, boys! Line up! Let’s go! Single file!”

I didn’t much care for his tone. But I understood the concept of lining up. I’d done it before. I got it. And I did like the Boy Scout uniform: I thought those crisp navy-blue shirts were extremely cool.

So, okay. I lined up. No worries.

But apparently the line we boys formed wasn’t tight enough for our DD. “Come on!” he barked. “You can do better than that! Everybody! Stare at the back of the neck of the boy in front of you!”

I walked out of the line. I didn’t want to stare at the hairy mole on the back of the neck of the kid standing in front of me. And I didn’t want to have to suddenly be self-conscious about what the back of my neck looked like, either. I knew I never washed back there. For all I knew, I had mold growing back there.

That night my mom asked me, “What happened? Why did you quit the Cub Scouts?”

“Because I’m too young to join the military,” I said. “Those guys are Nazis.”

“Fair enough,” my mom laughed.

Anyway, with following I’m not so good. And by “not so good,” I mean spectacularly bad. I’m … congenitally predisposed toward independence. I’m actually sort of feral about remaining independent.

For the record, that’s not something I’m proud of. I’m aware that being the sort of guy who doesn’t (as I didn’t) get his picture taken for his senior year high school yearbook has in my life done me at least as much harm as good.

It also doesn’t mean that I don’t like people. I do. A lot! I love people! I stalk seven or eight of them, assiduously. You could set your watch by when I show up at certain bushes throughout my town.

Har! Stalking jokes!

Always not quite funny!

Anyway, about church authority.

I have zero interest in it. None. Zero. Zilich. Nada. I just don’t care what anyone else thinks about what I think about God.

Which is not to say that I’m uninterested in what other think about God. Far from it. I know I can be deeply enriched through other people’s thoughts, experiences and explorations of God, as well as by studying the history of religion generally and Christianity in particular.

Good times, for sure.

But tell me what I should think about God? Tell me what God or Jesus really means by something in the Bible? Tell me (of all things) what church authority has always said about this thing or that?

Then you might as well tell me to line up, and stare at the neck of the guy in front of me.

What is the Holy Spirit for, if not to let us know all that we need to know about God? What was the whole point of the Reformation, if not to definitively assert that everyone can quit listening to church authority, and just start being with God? Why in the world am I supposed to think that someone who has a seminary degree, or graduated from Yale Divinity, or (of all things) wrote a bestselling Christian book, knows more about, or has more direct access to, God, than I do? Who cares about that stuff? Getting a seminary degree is a career choice, not a special ordination from God. Going to Yale Divinity means that you could afford to go to Yale Divinity (and are unlikely to ever have a real job.) Having a bestselling Christian book means that pastors bought your book in bulk to use in their church’s adult education classes—which means the book was really, really safe (read: boring), and encouraged people to give. Is there any way such a book won’t be excruciatingly boring?

Some guy with great hair and a magnetic personality heads a mega-church, and I’m supposed to think he’s got some kind of direct Bat-line to God?

Homey don’ think so.

Okay. Back to work for me. Thanks for letting me rave at you, friends.

obeying church authority

Previous Post

November 13, 2010

One Woman's Conversion Experience (While Driving!)

Next Post

November 15, 2010 Listen to God; Screw the Rest

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Christian Issues Christian Spirituality Dear John En Espanol Everywhere She's Not Humor Look See Pastor Bob's Corner Personal Portuguese Relationships Russian Short-short story Smith Family Chronicles Uncategorized

Select a Month March 2024 August 2022 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 February 2020 December 2019 June 2019 December 2018 May 2018 May 2017 January 2017 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

I am the first to fall asleep in death for following Jesus. I saw heaven opened as stones struck me. Who am I?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Peter James John Stephen

Books by This Author Books by John Shore

See All Titles »