Venus Spinning Backwards: The Christians’ Achilles Heel?

Last updated on: March 3, 2008 at 5:19 am by John Shore

Venus Spinning Backwards: The Christians’ Achilles Heel? 2008-03-03T05:19:23-08:00 John Shore

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It must be admitted that atheists make some good points about why and how a person might arrive at the conclusion that there is no God. Fair enough; reason is a beautiful thing, and we must all respect its power. (Of course, in my last post, Atheists of America Agree: Christianity Makes Eminent Rational Sense!, I proved so conclusively that the Christian view of life is the only one that makes sense that everyone who read and/or commented on that post agreed with it. I expected no less.)

I’m so sure that Christ was God come to earth as man that I am willing to hand the atheists what I think is their final, best bet for making the case that there either is no God at all — or that if there is a God, he’s such a dunderhead that anyone who ignores him will surely be forgiven.

Listen up, atheists: This is your Big Chance. What I am about to tell you is like Achilles stopping on the battlefield, pointing to his heel, and hollering out, “Hey, everyone! Shoot me here! This is where I’m vulnerable! Just aim right here!”

Venus spins backwards.

Oh, like you knew.

You atheists have to act like you know everything, don’t you?

Anyway — since I do know you people want proof of everything — verification that Venus turns the wrong way is here.

Atheist or not, you will, I know, be upset to learn that one of our Key Planets doesn’t even know which way it’s supposed to turn. I must admit that I, too, was shocked to discover this most disorienting of facts.

Aetheist or Christian, we all want to exist in an ordered, dependable universe. A retarded Venusian revolution certainly challenges the assumption that we do.

Challenges it, yes. But wins that challenge? I think not.

I believe that Venus spinning backwards does not prove that God doesn’t exist. As we all know, since time immemorial, Venus has represented love. I think having Venus spin backwards is God’s way of bringing all of humanity together under the one great and universal truth that no matter who you are, where you come from, or what you believe in, love remains an insane thing you can’t predict, control, or feel comfortable with at all.

We can argue about the existence of God until the cows forget how to come home. But surely we must all agree that when it comes to the human emotion of love, we are, and must forever remain, out and out morons.

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