Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
Pagan
The Limits of Accessibility for Pagan Clergy

The Limits of Accessibility for Pagan Clergy

Last updated on: April 25, 2019 at 3:00 am by John Beckett

The Limits of Accessibility for Pagan Clergy 2019-04-23T18:07:40-06:00 John Beckett

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

A few days ago a Pagan clergy friend posted a straightforward but complicated question: “How accessible do you think someone who is clergy should be?”

My response was basically “we all have to decide for ourselves.” If you’re never accessible you aren’t serving as clergy. If you’re always accessible you’ll do nothing else. The boundaries lie somewhere in between, and they’re different for everyone. But there are some guidelines that can help some of you draw your own boundaries as clergy, and can help others understand why your favorite Pagan clergyperson isn’t as accessible as you’d like them to be.

I covered some of this in “Self-care for Priests and Other Pagan Leaders” at Sacred Space, I workshop I’ll give again at Mystic South in Atlanta in July (come to Mystic South – it’s awesome!).

Who is Pagan clergy?

Titles like “priest” “priestess” and “clergy” are not always well understood in the Pagan community. Some people claim them who don’t deserve them, while others reject them even though they’re doing the work. In 2014 I wrote a fairly detailed explanation of my views on Pagan priesthood. Priesthood and clergy often go together, but not always.

In the context of the original question and in my own practice, the clergy are the people who care for a religious community. In particular, they provide pastoral care, especially counseling. And that’s where questions of boundaries and accessibility come in. If you’re serving as clergy – regardless of your title – do you have to be available 24/7?

That question has a simple answer: no.

Our ministry isn’t our livelihood

The only model most of us have for clergy is what we see in other religions: Protestant ministers, Catholic priests, Jewish rabbis, and such. Many of us assume that Pagan religious leaders should do more or less the same things in more or less the same ways.

That wasn’t the case in ancient times – you didn’t go to a temple priest for counseling. Their job was to care for the shrines and to perform necessary rites, not to provide pastoral care. Whether modern Pagans should return to that model is an interesting question, but one for another time.

The problem with comparing ourselves to, say, UU ministers, is that their congregations are paying them to provide pastoral care (among many other things). Nobody is paying us – that means we have to make a living doing something else. If you call me at 3:00 AM, that’s going to impact my ability to do my paying job the next day. If you want an hour of my time every week, that’s an hour I can’t spend writing blogs or books or resting up from my paying job.

I’m always happy to answer brief questions or to make recommendations free of charge. If you want more lengthy services, you should expect to pay for it – whether you come to me or any other Pagan clergy.

The limits of expertise

I’m a Druid and a priest who makes his living as an engineer. I’m not a psychologist. I can provide basic pastoral counseling and spiritual care. I cannot provide therapy. It’s not a question of licensing so much as it’s a question of expertise – I don’t know how to provide mental health care.

Spiritual issues and mental health issues are often intertwined. But spiritual treatment is no substitute for proper mental health care. If I think someone has mental health issues, or if their needs simply exceed my skills, I’ll refer them to a mental health professional.

The same is true for spiritual matters. If you need a major magical working, I’m probably going to refer you do someone who does that kind of work on a regular basis.

If you’re serving as clergy is it essential that you know your skills and your limitations. When someone’s needs exceeds what you can provide, the only ethical option is to refer them to someone with greater skills in that area.

Emergencies vs. regular occurrences

We all intuitively understand that extraordinary situations call for extraordinary responses. If a friend is critically injured in a wreck, that calls for a different level of response than if someone scratches the paint on their new car. Part of being in community is being available for people in their hour of need. When emergencies happen, we go.

But with some people, emergencies can become regular occurrences. Maybe that’s legitimate: some medical or psychological conditions have flare-ups that can happen at any time. Or maybe it’s not, and they’re trying to take advantage of your generosity.

We need not judge who is worthy of our help and who is not (unless they’re being manipulative, in which case judge away). Just as expertise is a limitation, so is bandwidth. Doing something once or twice in what we think is an emergency does not obligate us to do it on an on-going basis. If someone needs more from you than you can provide, refer them to social services or other professionals.

Family, community, and acquaintances

We may all be created equal, but everyone is not equal when it comes to providing pastoral care. Reciprocity matters. Ties of blood, sweat, and tears matter.

I have my family, some of blood and others of choice. These people have always been there for me and so I’ll always be there for them. They can call on me any time, for any reason, and I’ll respond. I know they’ll do the same for me.

Then there’s my community, the people I know and work with (in person or on-line) on a regular basis. People who share my beliefs and practices, who share my goals to build a better world here and now. They may not have done me any personal favors, but we’re part of the same movements and the same organizations. We’re neighbors (regardless of physical distance) and so I’m going to respond in an neighborly fashion. My boundaries here are tighter than they are with family, but they’re still pretty generous.

Then there are acquaintances, people I barely know, or who know me from my writing even though I don’t know them. Here there is no reciprocity, no past favors I’m obligated to return. But there is hospitality – welcoming those in need and doing your best to be a good host. I’ll do what I can for acquaintances, but my boundaries are pretty firm.

In practice, though, what is within my boundaries has almost always been enough.

Set your boundaries now

Clergy work has a way of finding the people who can do it. Build a strong practice of your own, demonstrate good listening skills, show you’ve got a bit of wisdom about yourself and people will find you. Some of them just need to be heard. Some need help with discernment. Some need professional assistance. If you can do any of that they’ll find you, no matter your titles, certifications, or lack thereof.

But whatever you can do, you can’t do everything. You can’t be everything for everyone, and you can’t be available to anyone at all times. Setting boundaries is not only proper, it’s necessary – otherwise you’ll burn yourself out and you won’t be able to help anyone.

I can tell you how I’ve set my boundaries, but I can’t tell you how to set yours – you have to do it yourself.

If you’re functioning as Pagan clergy, you probably know that many times people don’t need advice so much as they need affirmation. They need someone to tell them they’re doing the right thing and to help them find the confidence to do what they know they need to do, even though it’s not easy.

Consider this your affirmation. Boundaries are necessary. Limits on accessibility are necessary. Drawing and enforcing them will help you to serve as clergy effectively for a long time while still living a healthy life.

Blessings to you as you do the sacred work you’re called to do.

Previous Post

April 23, 2019

Memento Mori: The Bone Church of Kutna Hora

Next Post

April 28, 2019 Walking in the Temples of a Foreign God

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Books Community CUUPS Druidry Foundations and Context Gods and Goddesses Magic Myth Nature Ritual Spiritual Practice Theology Travel Uncategorized Videos

Select a Month October 2026 September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 May 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

How many disciples did Jesus have?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Twelve Thirty Seven One hundred