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Drugged. Interstellar Exploration of the Incarnation

Drugged. Interstellar Exploration of the Incarnation

Last updated on: December 21, 2020 at 1:42 pm by Jeff Hood

Drugged. Interstellar Exploration of the Incarnation 2020-12-21T13:42:53-06:00 Jeff Hood

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Drugged.

Interstellar Exploration of the Incarnation

Loud music. “Jesus is alive!” Loud music. “Do you know Jesus?” Loud music. “With every head bowed and every eye closed…” Soft music. “X number of people have come to know Jesus!” Loud music. “We can’t leave tonight without giving a portion back…” Loud music. “Go live for Jesus!” Loud music.

The formula was always the same.

Truth be told, I hated all of it. It always felt so produced…predictable…inauthentic…fake…bogus…false…counterfeit…phony…synthetic…fraudulent…artificial…feigned…deceptive…faked…pretend…plastic…fictitious…dead…put-on…contrived…invalid…forced…mechanical…misleading…strained…manufactured…mimicked…untrue…constructed…worthless…imitative…fabricated…deceptive…insincere…invented…concocted… Ok, I think you get the point. Despite my best efforts, I always seemed to find myself near that bullshit. I’m sure I was mindlessly chasing some ass that night. I can’t think of any other reason that I would’ve been there. Yet, there I was.

I was there but I really wasn’t. Looking back, I suspect that someone drugged me. That’s why some of my memories are disjointed. Let’s see… I remember wildly running toward the light. I remember thousands of hands grabbing at me. I remember the speaker declaring me chosen. I remember starting to shake as everyone cheered. Then, everything went dark. I was out. I woke up in a white room. Five other people were there too.

When I tried to unlock the door or ask what was going on, I was told to stop interrupting, kneel quietly and pray for the mission. I didn’t know what in the hell they were talking about….but they looked beyond serious. I don’t know how long I prayed…but I do know that I never want to pray that long again. When I was just about to explode, the door swung open and a woman demanded that we come with her. When I hesitated, I was picked up and carried by the other people in the room. One by one, they proclaimed, “We will carry this burden together…” I still didn’t know what in the hell they were talking about. I hadn’t signed up for shit. Then again, I couldn’t remember whether I had or not.

Stunning light filled the room. I thought I might be dead. Loud music started booming out of the speakers. The music sounded familiar but the words were different. Everybody else started raising their hands, shaking and falling all of the floor. Not wanting to be suspicious, I did too. In the midst of it all, I tried to listen to the words…to get some clue of what was happening. “The heavens will declare will declare you majesty…as I fly far beyond my celestial home to share your glory!” As I was trying to figure out what they were talking about…the door swung open and a man motioned for us to follow him.

We were told to sit in one of the six chairs. I had never even seen a chair so large. Seatbelts shot out of the chair and strapped us down. I started freaking out. Immediately, a nurse came over and gave me an injection that knocked me out. When I woke up, I was still in the chair…but now I had a thick protective bubble around me. Looking around, I asked the other five people why it felt like we were laying down. Nobody answered. Thunder erupted. Everything shook. The windows revealed a sky exploding towards us. Then, I realized what was going on. “I’d been drugged into going into going into outer space!” Once we left the atmosphere, the woman next to me said, “You should be thanking us. We took you out of your sinful lifestyle…and now you are on a mission to take the name of Jesus farther than it has ever been carried before. God has blessed you with this opportunity!” Judging from her tears, I didn’t respond how she thought I would. “Fuck you.”

“Cryosleep initiating…”

…and just like that, I was out.

We slept for years…maybe even centuries…hell, maybe even millennia…then again, I guess it could only have been for a few seconds. “What is going on?” I didn’t have a clue. I was becoming more and more desperate for answers. Then, I saw a strange looking planet come into view. “Where are we?” Finally, one of the guys up front answered. “You were intensely prayed over and chosen to be a part of this special mission. We were put into a spacecraft and shot out into the abyss of space as far as we could possibly go. We are millions and millions and millions of light years from earth. There will be no return. The singular purpose of our lives is to land on this planet and share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with its’ inhabitants.” “Why didn’t anyone ask me if I wanted to be part of this bullshit?” “We did.” “You said yes.” “I was drugged!” “Regardless, you’re here now…”

“Landing sequence initiated…”

…and just like that, I was falling.

We landed with a thud. Everyone in the cabin started cheering praises to God. I was in hell. When the door opened, I was shocked at the landscape. I couldn’t figure out what I was looking at. Descending the stairs, I kept wondering if I was dreaming. Before I knew it, one of the others planted a Christian flag and declared the planet conquered for Christ. Everyone cheered…everyone but me that is. For months, we fanned out in different directions looking for signs of life. We didn’t find a damn thing. Then, something miraculous happened…

“If there is anything on this planet…save me from this futility…”

…and just like that, I saw the ooze.

I was terrified. I hadn’t signed up for any of this. Quickly, everything started to change. My heart was strangely warmed. Then, the ooze spoke, “Who do you say that I am?” “I don’t have a fucking clue.” “No, who do you say that I am?” “I don’t know what to say.” “Listen to your heart.” All of a sudden, the answer welled up from deep within me. “You are the Christ…the very ooze of God.” “Go and tell the others what has been revealed to you.”

“Lo, I am with you always…”

…and just like that, the ooze disappeared.

I raced to tell the others what I’d seen. None of them believed me. In fact, everything I said just made them angrier and angrier. “Blasphemy! There is no Christ but Christ they all screamed repeatedly.” Before I knew it, they locked me in the ship until I recanted. After about a day, I told them I must have been mistaken. One by one, the others told me how glad they were that I was returning to Christ. I didn’t know what they were talking about. I didn’t care. I just knew I wasn’t locked up anymore.

“Greetings my children…”

…and just like that, the ooze appeared.

The others were terrified. “Be not afraid.” I wasn’t. “God has sent me to proclaim salvation to you. For, I am the Christ.” For days, the ooze stayed with us and shared exactly what our hearts had always longed for. The miracles were incessant. Before the end of our stay together, we were all on our knees worshiping this newfound Christ. We begged the ooze not to go. It was of no use.

“Let not your hearts be troubled…Believe in God, believe in…”

…and just like that, the ooze disappeared.

Months passed and we were growing more confused by the day. We just didn’t know what to do except wait for the ooze to return. One day…after most of us had lost hope…thousands of oozes appeared in our midst. We were shocked. We thought there was only one. We were wrong.

“I wanted you to meet the fullness of Christ…”

…and just like that, the oozes were everywhere.

Indescribable. Uncontainable. They’d placed all the stars in the skies and they knew them all by name. What our minds could not comprehend…our hearts knew. We had come to a knowing of something so much greater than anything we’d known before. Namely, that the fullness of the incarnation is available to all. We could all become Christ. We didn’t hesitate.

“Draw near to us…”

…and just like that we were all turned to ooze.

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