“[His] death cannot go by with no meaning at all.”

Last updated on: May 23, 2017 at 9:32 am by Jane the Actuary

“[His] death cannot go by with no meaning at all.” 2017-05-23T09:32:03-06:00 Jane the Actuary

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

from pixabay, https://pixabay.com/en/sling-hangman-hanging-knot-1222466/

The front-page story in today’s paper: “Naperville teen’s senseless tragedy: ‘They scared him to death’.” It reports on a Naperville teenager, Corey Walgren, who committed suicide after being confronted by a school official and a police officer over a recording he made, and reportedly shared with others, of a sexual encounter — the girl on the recording had made the complaint, and, as it happened, the video was not viewable, so that it was, functionally, an audio recording only (whether she knew that or not is unknown).

The article contains, by and large, the usual rose-tinted profile — he had never been in “serious” trouble before, he was notable for playing hockey without penalties, he was on the honor roll, he had a group of tight-knit friends, and so on. Then the article details the police visit — he was pulled into an office during lunch at school, the school dean and the officer asked to look at his phone and found the video in question, they talked to him for 18 minutes, then called his parents and discussed the matter with his mother by phone (she was at work), at which point the officer suggested the matter might be handled by a “station adjustment” – that is, an informal agreement to do community service or the like rather than going through the formal juvenile system. The boy was then escorted to an office waiting area to wait for his mom to leave work and come to the school to sign some paperwork, but he walked away, and was finally found after he jumped off the top of a parking garage.

Doug and Maureen Walgren plan to file a lawsuit against both the school district and the police department. They hope legal action will spur the school and police to rethink how they handle future incidents involving minors.

“There has to be a change in their policy and their procedures,” Maureen Walgren said. “Corey’s death cannot go by with no meaning at all.”

What exactly is their complaint? What do they think the school district and police department did wrong? The article says that the police failed to contact the parents soon enough — that various legal “guidelines” state that unless the student is an immediate danger to others or immediate action is needed to prevent destruction of others, the parents should be contacted before the police has any contact with the student.

Would this have made a difference? It seems to me that having a parent on the phone when being confronted by the police, or having to wait while mom leaves work, sitting, mind racing about the consequences, could have made it worse. Or is the lawsuit claiming that the boy shouldn’t have been able to walk away but should have been under close supervision? Or that, indeed, they should have never pursued the matter in the first place? (There was a real girl that was harmed by his actions.)

This chain of events suggests to me, more than anything else, that the picture-perfect life the article portrays, was not truly the case. Perhaps it is indeed the case that otherwise “normal” kids, with no mental health issues or other problems with their lives, when confronted by something sudden that they don’t know how to cope with, are in fact at risk of suicide (though I doubt that suicide-prevention is the objective of the “call the parents” rule). But it just seems unlikely — and, what’s more, though I get that it’s a coping mechanism, the notion of pursuing a lawsuit in order to have a suicide “mean something” doesn’t sit well with me at all.

After all, it wasn’t all that long ago that everyone was talking about the “13 Reasons Why” Netflix show — criticizing the implicit message that committing suicide can “accomplish” something, even if it’s just exacting revenge on people who think have wronged you. In fact, it’s still in the news: the New York Post, for instance, reports on parents claiming that the story inspired their son to kill himself.

And it’s something that shows up more that it should – the idea that a suicide can be meaningful. There was a CNN report a while back that I blogged about, in which a transgender teen committed suicide, with the seeming objective both to punish the parents and to bring about social change. The Robin Williams case, too, seemed to have a fair bit of reaction that he had a “good reason” to kill himself. And the suicide rate in the US is rising (though still not as high as in other countries — according to WHO, we rank 48th) — remember that suicide outranks breast cancer as a cause of “premature” death.

Now, I know that causes of suicide are complex, and have to do with mental illness and also the increasing precariousness of working-class lives, but I worry that we’ve lost the ability to say that suicide is simply wrong, and that this cultural “brake” on suicide is gone and we’re left trying to reason our way out of it.

Image: from pixabay, https://pixabay.com/en/sling-hangman-hanging-knot-1222466/

Uncategorized

suicide

Previous Post

May 22, 2017

Wishful thinking isn't enough: the demise of tracking at Illinois high schools

Next Post

May 24, 2017 The terrible, horrible, no good, very bad budget "cuts"

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Actuarial/Retirement Issues Politics Uncategorized

Select a Month September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 December 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 August 2021 June 2021 April 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What city's name means "house of God" and was the place of Jacob's dream?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Shiloh Bethel Nazareth Bethlehem