Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Grow Mama Grow

Home
About
Contact
All Posts
- Islamophobia and The Prophets: What We Can Learn
- Is Islamophobia a Reality at School? How to Talk to Your Kids About It
  - There’s a Used Condom on My Door Handle: Hate Crimes and the Burden of Proof

Home
Muslim
Sleepless in Suburbia

Sleepless in Suburbia

Last updated on: November 10, 2011 at 5:00 am by Admin GrowMama

Sleepless in Suburbia 2011-11-10T05:00:05-04:00 Admin GrowMama

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

I used to be known as the “log”. Once I fell asleep, I was out cold. It would take forever to wake me up, and I could sleep for hours on end.

That all changed once I became a parent. Now my husband and I will be lucky if we can get through even half the night with unbroken, solid slumber. Our kids love coming into our bed at night and look for any excuse to sleep with us. Even though we have a king size bed, it is not meant for four individuals to sleep on it at once.

We have come to terms with our sleepless nights. It has been a reality of our nighttime routine since my daughter was a baby. She was born premature and needed help to maintain her body heat. We figured the obvious solution was to keep her next to us in our bed at night. She is now six years old and still likes to sleep with us. Our three-and-a-half-year-old son, on the other hand, was not a preemie but sure loves to cuddle at night. They both start off the nights in their own room but somehow always end up in our bed before morning. This is our rendition of co-bedding.

Both of my kids were never “ferberized.” I am not a big believer in the Ferber method of letting the child “cry it out” and soothe himself to sleep. My heart is not cut out for it. Those that choose to use the method and it works for them, then more power to them.

For a newborn, his mother is the only world he knows and recognizes. He goes from her womb to seeking nourishment from her breast to adapting and adjusting to this big, crazy world. So how do we expect this same baby to immediately find comfort elsewhere away from any familiar warmth or scent? These are powerful senses to which a baby first responds.

I do not consider attending to your child’s needs as necessarily spoiling him or her. These soft-hearted, little beings have an inner compass that naturally points to their parents as a consistent source of comfort and security. Parents provide a true sense of constancy for their children.

However, this provision needs to be consistent during the day and night. We are so aware of our children’s wants and needs during the day, so why can we not be the same at night? Why are we so quick to outcast them from the comfort of our arms and shoulders when they need us the most at night? Yes, there is a need for a couple’s personal space and privacy, but the entire night is not needed for a couple’s “alone time”. These are precious years that just fly by in the blink of an eye, even if it is a sleep-deprived eye. By letting your kids know you are there for them at night when they may be the most vulnerable, you will be helping their emotional and physical growth and development. It is also a great way to build long-lasting, solid bonds with your children.

Eventually there will come a time when your kids will understand the concept of privacy and give you that space and want that same space and privacy for themselves. Until then make the most of these warm, cuddly sleepless nights. And to all a good night…

Tips on Avoiding Sleepless Nights (or at least reducing them)

Make the transition into the child’s own bedroom exciting and personal. Let her pick the colors, help with the décor, set up the furniture and choose fun bed linen for herself.
Offer soft, fuzzy stuffed animals for your child to snuggle and rely on during the night.
Leave a small night light on in her bedroom, in the hallway near your bedroom, and the washroom to avoid any injury or the child’s possible fear of the dark.
Use a consistent night time routine to calm the child’s nerves at bedtime: warm bath, aromatherapy, soothing sounds, lullabies, saying a prayer, story time, etc. This is also a great way to bond and comfort your child.
Leave a cup or bottle of water near the child’s bed in case she gets thirsty at night.
Take care of all potty business before bedtime. If the child does happen to get up at night, take her straight to the washroom while keeping the lights dim. Try not to say much to her at that time or make too much noise, since she will probably still be in a sleepy state. Then just tuck her back into her bed.
Have a corner or area of your bedroom ready for company with a sleeping bag or mat on the floor. Let the child know, if need be, she is welcome in your room, just not in your bed.

Tayyaba Syed

Tayyaba is a freelance journalist from Illinois. She has been featured on NPR and writes for numerous publications. She also speaks about marriage and family. Most importantly, she is blessed to be a mother of two little adventurers and blogs at www.tayyabasyed.blogspot.com. ” Sleepless in Suburbia” was originally published in Chicago Parent Magazine.

Motherhood Reflections

Previous Post

November 7, 2011

The Water of Zamzam

Next Post

November 14, 2011 All American Reality TV Show

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Book and Movie Reviews Community Connecting with Allah Counselor's Corner Environment fatherhood five stars GrowBaba Spotlight GrowMama Picks Growmama Roundup Health Light Fare marriage Motherhood Reflections moving Parenthood Photography Poems Schooling Self-development tragedy Tutorials Uncategorized

Select a Month December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 November 2008

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Which king had dreams interpreted by Daniel?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Belshazzar Ahasuerus Nebuchadnezzar Darius