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Set Apart by God: When Your Gifts Make You Different

Set Apart by God: When Your Gifts Make You Different

Last updated on: November 1, 2026 at 5:00 am by Michele Gunn

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Set Apart by God: When Your Gifts Make You Different 2026-10-20T07:51:59-05:00 Michele Gunn

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Child being told to blend in

Set Apart by God: When Your Gifts Make You Different/created in Canva

Growing up as a child, I often felt left out. Also, I felt different, like I didn’t belong and I did not have the self-awareness then that I now have. I also hadn’t yet acquired the knowledge I needed to become who God created me to be. I am different. So are you. That is a beautiful thing! You need to know that you are set apart by God. God has created each of us with unique gifts, talents, personalities and strengths. We aren’t meant to be identical. We are meant to use what He has given us to fulfill His purpose for our lives and serve others.

Yet sometimes the very qualities that make us unique are the ones that cause us to feel like we don’t belong. When you are feeling different, maybe even left out or like you don’t belong, remember Jeremiah 1:5, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I dedicated you, a prophet to the nations I appointed you.” Although these words were spoken specifically to Jeremiah about his prophetic calling, they remind us that God knows us intimately. Our existence is not an accident, and our lives have meaning in His eyes.

What if the qualities you have spent years trying to hide are among the very gifts God wants you to develop?

When Different Feels Like Too Much

There were several things in my childhood that made me feel awkward and like I didn’t belong. Some circumstances even made me feel ashamed as if I was doing something terribly wrong. It was in first grade when I had a horrible and embarrassing experience in school. I was a talker. Apparently, my talking was disruptive in class. I don’t remember that, but I do remember the consequence I was forced to face as a six year old child. The teacher put tape over my mouth. She chose to silence me. It was then that I was taught not to be me, at least that part of me. The experience stifled my natural outgoing personality. It actually made me more shy and hesitant to speak. I began burying something that I now recognize as part of my God-given gifts.

Of course, children need to learn when to speak and when to listen. Those are important life lessons. But there is a difference between teaching a child to use her voice appropriately and making her feel ashamed of having one. For years, I didn’t fully recognize the impact that experience had on me. Looking back, I can see how something that once made me feel embarrassed and inadequate was connected to gifts I would eventually learn to appreciate. Today, I use my voice through writing, speaking, teaching and encouraging others. The little girl who was once silenced eventually discovered that her voice could be used to make a positive difference. That doesn’t make what happened right. But it reminds me that our painful experiences do not have to define the rest of our lives.

Have you ever wondered whether you needed to become less of yourself in order to belong?

Set Apart Doesn’t Mean Separated

Oftentimes, people feel rejected when they don’t fit in. Yet there is a difference between being rejected by others and being uniquely created by God. God doesn’t create everyone with identical personalities, talents, strengths or purposes. You are uniquely created to be flawed yet fabulous! That means none of us is perfect, but every person is uniquely created and loved by God.

I find comfort in Romans 12:4–8, “For as in one body we have many parts, and all the parts do not have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ and individually parts of one another. Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us exercise them: if prophecy, in proportion to the faith; if ministry, in ministering; if one is a teacher, in teaching; if one exhorts, in exhortation; if one contributes, in generosity; if one is over others, with diligence; if one does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.”

St. Paul explains that just as one body has many parts with different functions, we are one body in Christ, each possessing gifts that differ according to God’s grace. Think about that for a moment. A body cannot function as God intended if every part tries to perform the same role. The same is true of our families, churches, workplaces and communities.

Set Apart with Gifts

Some people are natural leaders. Others are compassionate listeners. Some have the gift of teaching, while others are gifted at organizing, creating, encouraging or serving quietly behind the scenes. None of these contributions is insignificant. We sometimes confuse belonging with fitting in. We believe that if we think, act, speak or behave like everyone else, we will finally be accepted. But belonging doesn’t require sameness. God calls us into community, not isolation. Our differences aren’t necessarily barriers to connection. When guided by love and humility, they can become the very qualities that strengthen our relationships and communities. Being set apart for God’s purposes doesn’t mean believing we are better than anyone else. It means recognizing that we each have something meaningful to contribute.

Your Gifts Were Given for a Reason

Gifts aren’t simply characteristics that make us special; they’re entrusted to us for service. It is not just having them that matters. It is how we use them! 1 Peter 4:10 reminds us, “As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God’s varied grace.” Do you know the reason for your gifts?

Sometimes we become so focused on discovering our purpose that we overlook the gifts already present in our everyday lives. Consider the person who naturally notices when someone is struggling and offers encouragement. Or the individual who can bring order to a chaotic situation. Think about someone whose creativity helps others see possibilities they hadn’t considered. These qualities may seem ordinary to the people who possess them. In fact, we often underestimate our strengths because they come so naturally to us. But what comes naturally to you may be exactly what someone else needs.

The challenge is learning to recognize those gifts, develop them and use them intentionally. We don’t have to wait for a special calling, a perfect opportunity or a particular title to begin serving God. Sometimes our purpose is revealed through the small, faithful ways we use what He has already given us.

Gift or Wound? Learning the Difference

Sometimes behavior comes from insecurity or past hurt rather than gifting. Prayer, self-awareness, wise counsel and honest reflection help us discern the difference. There is another important part of discovering who God created us to be. Not every characteristic we develop is necessarily a God-given gift. Sometimes we behave in response to past hurts, insecurity, fear or the desire to be accepted.

For example, someone who always puts others first may genuinely possess the gift of compassion. But that same behavior can sometimes come from a fear of disappointing people or being rejected. A person who takes charge may have natural leadership abilities. Yet the need to control every situation may also develop from experiences that left them feeling powerless. Even being quiet can reflect different things. Some people are naturally reflective and thoughtful. Others may have learned to remain silent because they were once made to feel that their opinions didn’t matter. The behavior may look similar, but the motivation behind it can be very different.

This is where prayer, self-awareness and spiritual discernment become important. Ask God to help you recognize the difference between the gifts He has given you and the protective habits you may have developed along the way. We can also benefit from honest reflection, trusted relationships and wise counsel. Healing doesn’t mean abandoning who we are. Sometimes it means releasing the fears and beliefs that have prevented us from becoming who God created us to be. God can use our experiences to help us grow, but we don’t have to carry every wound into our future.

Stop Shrinking What God Wants to Use

I encourage you to stop automatically apologizing for healthy qualities that God may be asking you to steward. How often do you apologize for qualities that are actually healthy parts of who you are? Perhaps you’ve been told you’re too talkative, too sensitive, too enthusiastic, too curious or too ambitious. Maybe someone suggested you should be quieter, less emotional or less willing to take the lead. Sometimes feedback is necessary. We all have opportunities to mature and learn how to use our strengths more effectively.

But there is a difference between refining a gift and suppressing it. Being enthusiastic doesn’t mean you shouldn’t learn to listen. if you are compassionate, you may need to establish boundaries. Being a leader doesn’t mean you shouldn’t practice humility. Spiritual growth isn’t about making ourselves smaller. It’s about allowing God to shape our gifts so they can be used with wisdom, love and purpose.

For many years, I didn’t understand the value of my own voice. Today, I realize that the ability to communicate, encourage and connect with others is something I can use in service to God. I am still growing. I am still learning. And I am still discovering new ways to use the gifts He has entrusted to me. So are you. Stop looking at your differences as something that needs to be corrected and begin asking how God might be inviting you to use them. You don’t need to become someone else to be valuable in God’s Kingdom. You need to become more fully the person He created you to be.

Rise, Align, and Shine: Embrace Your God-Given Gifts

Rise into the truth of how God created you. Release the belief that being different makes you less worthy of love, acceptance or belonging.

Align your gifts with His purposes. Prayer, reflection and discernment can be used to consider how your natural abilities and life experiences can be used to serve others.

Shine by faithfully using what God has entrusted to you. Don’t hide your gifts. Bring His love and light into the world by using your gifts.

Remember, you were never meant to blend in. You were created to shine!

A Moment of Graceful Reflection

Take some time to reflect on the following:

What qualities have you tried to hide because they made you feel different?
Are there past experiences that have influenced how you see your own gifts?
How might God be inviting you to develop and use those gifts to serve others?
What is one small step you can take this week to embrace who God created you to be?
What have people told you to tone down that God may be asking you to faithfully use?

Let’s end with prayer to guide us in this journey.

“Heavenly Father, thank You for creating me with intention, love, and purpose. Help me recognize the gifts You have entrusted to me. Heal the wounds that have caused me to question my worth or hide parts of who I am. Give me wisdom to develop my strengths, humility to use them well, and courage to serve others without fear of being different. May my life reflect Your love and bring glory to You. Amen.”

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