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Overcoming a Critical Spirit: Prayer, Humility, and Grace

Overcoming a Critical Spirit: Prayer, Humility, and Grace

Last updated on: October 9, 2024 at 10:44 am by Gillian Nichols

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Overcoming a Critical Spirit: Prayer, Humility, and Grace 2024-10-09T10:44:52-05:00 Gillian Nichols

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Woman sitting with clasped hands on top of an open Bible.

Struggling with a critical mindset? Learn how to replace judgment with prayer, humility, and God’s grace. Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

Believers, forgive me- I’m going to hit you right where it hurts (in love) today. Is one of your first reactions with others to be critical of their actions? Do you struggle with bubbling bitterness that pervades your thought life? What is at the root of this? We are going to get to the bottom of our thoughts, apply Scripture, and heal our hurting hearts by God’s grace. Let’s go!

Listen, no one in the Church talks about this frankly, but our sanctification can be messy.

Sanctification, or the ongoing process of the indwelling Holy Spirit in our hearts making us more like Jesus, can often be, dare I say it, stinky. I mean, give Him a break, He is literally remodeling your heart, mind, and strength!

Just like everyone, we love a remodeled home or project, but we loathe the messy part, right?

Oh we want the new floors, but when we actually see the mess of the old ones being torn up OR we see what they will cost us, we decide to keep the old gnarly ones.

Let us not be like this with our hearts, Christians!

It’s time for our Spiritual upgrade. Will you let it happen?

Bringing My Error to Light

A few weeks ago, it got messy for me and I humbly ask for your grace as you read further.

As the Spirit was atop my heart-scaffold, tearing down and building things up, He brought to light a terrible practice I often do: when I hear someone confide a hurt or something, I judge their behavior or actions first.

Instead of praying, sometimes I critique.

It’s ugly! It is not right! Shameful! I do not want to be like this! Help me, Lord!

Does this happen to you? Someone shares, and your immediate thought is for how they could fix their situation. What you would do differently.

Sadly, we cannot even play the “I am just a fix-it mom” card here, because that is not what that card is used for!

A Holy Spirit Smackdown

The other day it went like this: the need was shared.

So I thought, “Well, why do they do this though? They should be doing ______. That would solve it! That is how they got into ______.” Then other prideful thoughts chimed in until, I heard/felt the Holy Spirit say what I pray has changed my life:

“Why don’t you pray for them?”

What this person needed, was prayer and encouragement. These things lead to LIFE and hope.

What they got (originally) was my pride.

OUCH.

Now, I did not let them know I was thinking this, but God knew and He is what matters most.

Psalm 44:21:

“would not God have discovered it,
since he knows the secrets of the heart?”

Once, I heard this in my heart, I immediately felt convicted. And I prayed.

Holy People Still Slip Up

Even Paul struggled, y’all.

“For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.” (NIV, Romans 7:18-20)

The Key to Overcoming a Critical Spirit/Heart/Nature

First, know that there is hope. Always.

Prayer and humility prevail against our pride.

The key is remembering all that the Lord has done in your life. And remembering that you too are a work in progress.

Pray first. If someone has entrusted you with their problem, they need your prayers, not your pride.

I think this applies to ALL of us, especially those who are online in the social media world.

Have you noticed that social media is just one giant prayer request? Every post could spark a prayer. If you are ever wondering how to pray, just pull up that feed.

What Does Your Prayer Do?

Prayer changes things. We have all read the stickers. But prayer changes us too.

The Lord wants to rid us of all our pride. Pride can come in forms of bitterness, jealousy, superiority, criticism, self-righteousness, etc. And Satan uses this to his advantage. He wants to halt our prayers with our corrupted thought life.

This is why God’s Word says: “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (2 Cor. 10:5)

My heart went from a “better than” or “should do” posture, to one of kneeling (mentally) and giving to the Lord who truly knows that person’s situation, mind, heart, etc.

He is the only One capable of knowing what to do with any situation! How dare we act as if we can? Lord, forgive us.

Prayer releases our control (that we do not really have by the way), and recognizes God’s sovereignty in all.

Beware of this Folly!

But my brothers and sisters, beware! For we can use prayer as still a means to exact our judgement.

Side note, I hear this often: “do not judge” quoting: Matthew 7:1. However, we are not to judge hypocritically as the Pharisees did. We are called to “test the Spirits” and use God-given discernment in matters.

Reading the Word consistently will help us in this endeavor!

But our discernment should be for protection, for godly wisdom, for aid in teaching, etc. NOT for building up ourselves, but “building others up.” (Eph. 4:29)

Be Diligent in This

We must be diligent in allowing the Holy Spirit to work out His, God’s, will in our lives. If ever we feel the slightest bit of pride concerning others and their needs, that is the moment we must go back in for refinement.

God refines. We allow it. And we pray first!

John 16:8: