Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
Progressive Christian
I’m the Dad of Two Queer Kids. Are You Listening?

I’m the Dad of Two Queer Kids. Are You Listening?

Last updated on: March 15, 2018 at 2:20 pm by Robert Cottrell

I’m the Dad of Two Queer Kids. Are You Listening? 2018-03-15T14:20:01-05:00 Robert Cottrell

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Every time I tell our story, and I say that I have two queer daughters, I have to add a disclaimer. Usually something like, “that’s the phrase they chose.” If I don’t, it is inevitable that I will get confronted on my use of the word queer.

It is an immediate reminder that while we may have come so far, we have so far to go. Why should a label matter so much? If you knew my two daughters, it would help you understand. They are loving, kind, selfless, spiritual human beings. Why should it matter if they are straight or lesbian or bisexual or transgender or queer?

When I was growing up, the term queer was derogatory. It was a word you used with the intent of conveying harm, of inflicting a wound. But times have changed, attitudes have changed, that term has changed. It is now a word that is used with the intent of conveying individuality and beauty.

I think we all would benefit greatly from being a little queer, outside the norm, outside the box, outside the labels.

In food, labels can identify what it is that you don’t want in your body. Maybe the same is true with people. Labels identify who you don’t want in your life.

How sad for humanity.

You know what I think the problem is? And as a straight white male, this is an answer I give with the utmost authority: We need to listen more.

If we stop and listen, we would hear the beauty in the individual lives of our gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and queer children; we would hear the terror and fear in the voices of the 25% of the LGBTQ homeless youth who became homeless the very same day they came out to their christian parents; we would hear the calls for help from those struggling with self-harm and substance abuse as a result of family rejection; we would hear the desperate cries from the 70% who attempt suicide.

And when we hear a word like queer, instead of seeing a label or someone different, we would see a neighbor, a fellow human being, a child of God.

Someone who is loved, worthy. Someone who belongs.

Are you listening?

For more information about our work helping parents fully love, accept and affirm their LGBTQI children; and our work helping LGBTQI heal shame from family, religious and community wounds, visit www.FreedHearts.org

homosexualtiy and the bible

lgbt child

lgbt christian

Previous Post

January 4, 2018

Doesn't God Tell Us To Hate Evil? (This Could Change Everything!)

Next Post

March 27, 2018 What Happened in Just 5 Years

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Church & Religion Dear Susan Family Support Gay Weddings & Marriage GCN Conference Jesus Blog LGBTQ Support Parenting Personal Stories Suicide The Real Jesus Theology Transgender Uncategorized X Archived Posts

Select a Month August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 May 2026 February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 January 2025 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 June 2022 December 2021 May 2021 February 2021 November 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 May 2019 March 2019 January 2019 November 2018 March 2018 January 2018 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What attitude does Jesus teach toward children?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Send them away Teach them to fight Ignore them Welcome them

Support this
Column